Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals


View User's Journal

Daine's Journal
A collection of stories, thoughts, wanderings, and a bunch of fictional writing. A place to develop my characters or just think out loud... You'll never know what may be true or not.
Long Trials
Since I've been told I need to update my journal since the wedding, I figure I'll do that now. Forgive me if I ramble, I'm really tired.

Soren and I were married on Gaia April 1, 2006. It was a ton of fun, though I wish more people could have showed up. I also wish we had gotten more gifts, but that's just me. And I loved everything we did get. Don't get me wrong. I really just wanted more people to be there to celebrate.

We unfortunately had to end the ceremony fairly quickly, since Soren and I needed to rush home to take care of a family emergency. We continued the RP later that night, but we did have to cut things short. The wedding is still available and running in our guild...check it out!!

In real life, Soren and I (yeah, for those of you who have been following my journal, Soren is Jon from previous entries...Jake moved away as an update. We really weren't very well suited for eachother) have been getting along fairly well. I just wish I could find the right ways to show him how much I love him. We fight a lot more frequently, but we tend to make up a lot...and its a lot of fun to make up now!!!

We're doing pretty well, but any suggestions on how to spice up a relationship would be greatly appreciatd. We recently passed the year mark ( I really can't believe it's been that long!) and I love him to death.

I do have one issue, and since he never seems to read my journal, I don't think this will be a big problem.

As I mentioned numerous times in previous entries, he insists that he doesn't want to get married. Recently, he's been saying he just doesn't want to get married NOW, which I totally respect, but I do wish I knew if his timidity came from being with me and not having been with many other people or if it was just that he really wants to wait until his older and more settled. But it has become a bone of contention between the two of us and I hate bringing it up, since it seems to stress him out. But I can't help it. I always want to know if he has intentions to settle down with me, or if he really thinks it will end and we'll move on. I love him to death and never want to be with anyone else. But we're both looking at going off to grad school, and I'm worried we may not last through then.

Although I know I always say I advocate the mantra "If its meant to be, then it will happen", its just that I'm going through a slump where I'm thinking of changing life plans and don't want to make a decision to be with him and have that not come to any fruition...or to just always be his live-in girlfriend.

Are my fears validated? I don't want to keep bugging him about this, since neither of us can predict the future and it troubles him so...but I wish I had some sign that he intended to stay with me for forever. I just don't know. I get so nervous that this will end, because it is so perfect. I love him dearly and never want to lose him...but I'm afriad pushing the point will only serve to push him away...

Anyone looking for back story...there are a number of entries not shown in the "log" on the side, so if you really want to get to the good parts of the story, you have to keep going back...

User Comments: [7] [add]
yuki sete
Community Member
commentCommented on: Thu Aug 10, 2006 @ 06:22am
my boyfriend doesnt want to get married either, and i dont really have a preference right now. he doesnt want to because (not because of commitment) he doesnt see the point. to him its just a legal document that says we're married, but we still are going to be together and grow old together and live as contently as possible. i dont know soren's deal but its only been a year. to some, a year is too short a time to commit to marriage but to others its been fairly long and they might consider getting hitched. maybe give him some time on it?

i dont know what i can tell you to spice up your life. my boyfriend and i are content to just sit and chill together or uh.. make up.. or go for a walk. we like the simple things and anything else we do, we consider a bonus.


commentCommented on: Thu Sep 14, 2006 @ 11:52pm
I think I've already PM'ed you about this issue, but here's a couple of additional thoughts as well.

As yuki sete mentioned, a year isn't a long time for some people. You two haven't even lived together yet, just dating, so it's not like it's been a really heavy commitment (no offense meant). I wouldn't push the marriage issue until you've been dating for at least another year, tried living together, or both.

My boyfriend has commitment issues as well, so I know where you're coming from. I just don't push the issue and live each day in our relationship as it comes. Some days we fight or argue, but I know he loves me very much, as I love him, and we will work things out one day when he's ready to deal with the topic/issue of commitment, engagement, and marriage. And if he doesn't want that when we talk about it a few years down the road, I'll be very sad, but it's his choice and I will respect that.

Community Member
Community Member
commentCommented on: Sat Sep 16, 2006 @ 01:06am
I wish I could have been at your gaian wedding! I was so excited, but the timezone difference and everything. I went back the next day and read through the wedding. I'm sorry a family emergency came on such a day! I hope it got all worked out though. As for Soren, I'd give him a little space with the marrige thing, maybe ask a little less. In time if he confronts you about it, talk to him and tell him how you feel. Maybe he doesn't know you feel you two are not spending enough time togther. As for the grad school thing, that may be hard, but try to keep in touch with him as much as possible if you do go to grad school. Email, IM, letters, anything, I think that may be a key to staying together. Im not sure what else to say, I just hope that might help, and I hope you two stay togther!

commentCommented on: Fri Dec 29, 2006 @ 04:58am
ok, i agree on the part about letting him tell you if he wants marriage when he's ready. Because sometimes pushing them leads to stress, stress leads to anger, anger leads to arguments, and arguments equal not good. Get what I mean? lol

I know you want to know now, but knowing that he loves you, knowing that he sees the future with you, means he's somewhat thought about marriage( you really can't miss it when you want to spend the rest of your life with someone sweatdrop ) So let's jsut let him make his decision.. and it'll come naturally.

"When life gets you down, you now what you gotta do? Just keep swimming just keep swimming just keep swimming swimming swimming" another quote from Finding Nemo ^_^

Community Member
Community Member
commentCommented on: Tue Jan 29, 2008 @ 03:04am
i think you shouldn't worry about it, sooner or later things will come together.. and if he doesn't want to settle down with you then maybe it wasn't meant to be

commentCommented on: Tue Mar 18, 2008 @ 01:04am
Cool you got married!

Community Member
Community Member
commentCommented on: Mon Jun 30, 2008 @ 03:28am
yeah guys tend to often be shy about finalizing it... DO what feels right (I am sure you already have XD) and dont regret it, tis what you felt!

User Comments: [7] [add]
Manage Your Items
Other Stuff
Get GCash
Get Items
More Items
Where Everyone Hangs Out
Other Community Areas
Virtual Spaces
Fun Stuff
Gaia's Games
Play with GCash
Play with Platinum