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Is anyone else sick of trix rabbit rip-offs? For some reason, creativity has all but departed the bowled brekfast industry and pretty much every single cartoon mascot-abusing brand of flavored pencil shavings is going with the old "cartoon animal insists on robbery from children to get some f%#&ing cereal as opposed to going to a store and f#^&ing buying some. If money's supposed to be an issue, where's the money they use to get those acme-style-Wile-E.-Coyote deathtraps they always pull?

What kind of f#%^ing motivation is it to buy cereal if you think psychotic animal people will try to steal it every morning? What's this telling the children it's probobly supposed to be appealing to, "it's ok to steal stuff if you really want it and are willing to make stupid faces/slogans at the mere mention of it"? Genius.

I don't get what the've done with cookie crisp's mascot, either, didn't it used to be a dog that dressed and spoke like a highschool football coach? Why the hell is it now a werewolf in a sweater? Another thing, if that crap qualifies for miniture cookies, I think hot sauce now qualifies for bottled magma.

Then there's Lucky charms. I don't think Lucky is very lucky at all, or even very irish judging by how he never drowns his sorrows of being attacked by stupid children that also don't know what a f#@%ing store looks like with booze.
/profiling
Then again, at least the leprechaun isn't the one doing the chasing, they've just given him magic marshmallows he can't use efficiently to save his miserable life as opposed to the gold and cunning such beings were fabled to possess.

Then there's Coco puffs, the only mascot I know of whose name was actually just a name, "sonny". I don't see any relation between that name and chocolate or crack, (which the stuff is laced with, I'm guessing) so at least they aren't just naming him directly after their product. Still, I don't think I understand why that retarded bird would choose to live in a city made of chocolate if he's trying to escape his addiction rather than a N.Q.C.A. (not quite chocolate annoymous) meeting. Really, that stuff is just about as chocolate (better known in the form of a f%^#ing hershey bar) as a certain brand of crisps are cookies.

Finally, there's toucan sam, who instead of pursuing young children, now hunts for questionable treasure with his nephews. He's not ripping off the trix rabbit, but he is ripping off donald duck.

BOTTOM LINE: I hate commercialism, particularly when it's part of this "balanced" breakfast.

That's this week's rant, I'm Varmeip, Goodnight.