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An axiom is a belief or widely accepted notion about something that isn't really proven, I think, like a stereotype. Something that bugs me is when an axiom of a mythical creature (elf, werewolf, treant, etc.) is warped so much people wouldn't have likely guessed what it was supposed to be without being told outright. You may have guessed that I'm reffering to twilight here, as such, let the near-pointless hate speech begin.

I haven't seen the movie or read the books and have no desire to, mostly because the only good things I've heard can only be considered "good" from the perspective of a teenage girl. "Vampires," I've been told, move into a town infested with advanced stupidity being that most of the residents don't notice that the new family in town never eat or sleep, are often out at night, and sparkle like fairies when in sunlight. All but one person, bethy or something, overlooks these things and goes on being stupid. Bethy, however must have had her contacts in that fateful morning, because she deduced that edward, one of the blood suckers with severe mental issues, was both a vampire and entirely a good choice for a husband. For no adequate reason, from what I gather, she falls in love with him and he falls for her, maybe Ed was looking for the most intelligent person to stalk/act like a bipolar mormon around.

The story isn't really what bugs me most about the pitiful romance, it's what the writer did to the word vampire. In the olden days, (around 30 years ago, I think) a vampire was a humanoid monster that would drain you of blood, make you an undead slave, and leave you to fend for yourself when they grew bored of you, if not break your neck for kicks. It was thought that these demons would burst into flame if exposed to daylight and that holy water or christian religious symbols and garlic could keep tham out of arms' reach most of the time. Dracula could morph into a bat, a wolf, and an evil mist, crawl on walls like a lizard, command beasts (like the wolves surrounding his castle) to do his bidding, hypnotise with a glare and more.

The freaks of twilight light up like brooding christmas trees in sunlight, drink blood sometimes, posess super strength and speed, and for giggles, a random super power none of the others have. They would have been gothic, shiny X-men, but wait, there's more! I've been told that the powers they get are scraped from the bottom of the practicality barrel. One guy can mess with your emotions, which a silver-tongued man can do just as easily. The most useful power I can recall was the ability to read minds, sadly made void by the lack of thought that goes on in the land of retards they call home.

The biggest reason anyone could say they liked this garbage was the sheer degree of fantasy to it all. A girl meets an attractive mental case that doesn't know of a better choice for a romantic partner and they proclaim undying love to one another. Fueled with drama of the "he might and probobly will bite me" dilemma that comes packed neatly into the blood-sucking freak package, this is pretty much the common girl's fantasy, it seems.

To be clear, I don't think reimaging things is evil, I just find it annoying when people f@$k it all up with nonsense along the lines of arbitrary abilities and hollow love stories thrown in for no better reason than fan service. Sometimes it doesn't seem so much like writing as much as making a mess with a pen.

BOTTOM LINE: It's not wrong to drift a little, but can we at least stay close to the roots of what we're toying with?

That's this week's rant, I'm the Ominous Jester, Goodnight.