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Greetings, if you always laugh at the following words...

Balls
stick
thing
hard
snake
deep
come
any word deemed a "curse word",

or automatically think of some stupid innuendo at the sound of them, please kill yourself. Now. I'll wait.

...

.....

........

.....

...

!

Done? Probobly not, being that one who keeps their head eternally in the gutter probobly wouldn't be able to understand just why they need to die. If you can't go 10 minutes without saying something a 3rd grader would come up with, who will ever take you seriously? How will you ever make something of your short, pitiful life if all you know how to do is make an a** of yourself? Come to think of it, even if you are a 3rd grader, there's no reason not to grow up and grow out of that nonsense. If you're convinced there's nothing wrong with giggling and making stupid sex puns every time you hear one of the above words, your parents raised you wrong, go jump into a wood chipper.

A lot of people need to grow up. Maturity could help a number of childish retards, like those brain-dead punks that see themselves as "gangsters" even when they still ride the bus to school and are not, in fact, part of any gang. There's also the perverted monkeys that see any kind of interaction between a male and female as flirting or something of the like. Worse yet are the 14 year old t#$ts that think they ARE mature because their voices don't crack as much and they've begun to develop facial hair. Those are the best reasons I can come up with, being that when you ask such people how they "know for a fact" that they're perfectly grown up and definately smarter than everyone else, the answer is usually "because I am."

This is the dead givaway that they're trying to grow up, but don't quite know what it means to leave childhood. I think you truly begin to age when you put aside the silly things you once believed in, like ego and believing in things. About 3 years ago, I gave up the ridiculous notion that I could know something, being absolutly right one moment and then horribly wrong the next when I discovered one little detail that threw me off, going right back to being correct without question afterwards. At this point, I feel ancient, like my brain might crumble into dust (assuming it hasn't started to already) any given moment. Sadly, not many seem to have joined me in this unstable little rowboat of what's most likely truth, much happier with their overcomphensentarary titanic-esque cruiser of "We've got it". You know, the one that'll probobly sink and drown millions of people when an unknown iceberg scrapes it's surface, leaves a big, obvious hole into which the seas of doubt and chaos will flood, and is then disregarded when the second super ship, the S.S. Now we've got it, is built, covered with armor that may stop the iceberg from sinking it, but it becomes to heavy to sail and it sinks again, and I'll be in my rowboat.

Metaphors are fun.

Back to the original rant, the ego can be done without as well, being that it only inspires the testosterone-fueled patients of brain cancer to act even more ape-like and beligerant. If you're thinking the ego is what gives us confidence and keeps us from thinking "I should just jump into a wood chipper", that's self-esteem, kids, quite different. Ego seems to tell you "YOU are the best reardless of everything", self-esteem seems to say "you're probobly good for something and a decent human being." As far as I can tell, ego tells people to act childishly, self esteem just tells people to act.

BOTTOM LINE: Grow up.

That's this week's rant, I'm Varmeip, Goodnight.

this might just be my longest rant...