------Well I can always say that "I'll be okay". I'm genuinely afraid at the moment. I thought I had it planned out, but I'm not so sure anymore. I can't run away anymore, not while I'm losing time, not while I'm losing time. I don't even know where I'm going with this. My thoughts aren't coalesced enough to write a long entry, yet I feel as if I do a short one or a poem, it won't go away as soon. The fear, that is the fear of the future.
------A couple of weeks back I had this weird dream where I was hiding. I don't know why, but I was hiding as if my life depended on it. Held my breath to the point where I needed to breathe and it woke me up. That never happened before, usually when my fight or flight response triggers in the dream, I fight. I realize that I'm in my dream and utilize every possible way to prevent events from happening in the dream, or to destroy the enemy. I had once had this dream where I had lost a friend via murder. When I went to confront the culprit, I crushed their minds via telekinesis rendering them a vegetable. Of course, fight or flight activated, which allowed me to utilize such power. But that didn't happen, Instead I was running and hiding, from an unknown entity that I knew I could have obliterated.
------Maybe that entity was me, and that I'm afraid of what I could do, hurting people around me and what not. Maybe its the future telling me to wake up, and grow up. Maybe its her, chasing after me again, telling me to not forget about her even though she doesn't exist. Sorry for the mess....
This is Anikacy, Signing out
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My Book
I've been writing in this since I was thirteen in 2007. I still am writing in it, and it will probably be my legacy till the day I die. (Don't start reading from the beginning as my writing was atrocious then.)
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