• ALL
    la vie boheme x4

    MARK
    To days of inspiration, Playing hooky,
    Makin something out of nothing
    The need to express-
    To communicate,
    To going against the grain,
    Going insane, Going mad,
    To loving tension,
    No pension,
    To more than one dimension,
    To starving for attention,
    Hating convention,
    Hating pretestion,
    Not to mention, of course,
    Hating dear old mom and dad.
    To riding your bike midday
    Pass the three piece suits-
    To fruits-
    To no absolutes-
    To Absolut-
    To choice-
    To the Village Voice,
    To any passing fad.
    To being an us for once,
    Instead of at them

    ALL
    La vie boheme,

    Gust The Women-
    La vie boheme

    MAUREEN
    Is the equipment in a pyramid?

    JOANNE
    It is maureen

    MAUREEN
    The mixer doesnt have a case
    Don't give me that face! [a** slap]
    Hey mister, she's my sister!

    RESTAURANT MAN
    So thats 5 miso soup
    4 seaweed salad
    3 soy burger dinner
    2 tofu dog platters
    And 1 pasta with meatless balls
    (eww)

    COLLINS
    It tastes the same!

    MIMI
    If you close your eyes

    RESTAURANT MAN
    And 13 orders of fries, is that it here?

    ALL
    wine and beer!

    MIMI AND ANGEL
    To hand crafted beers made in local breweries,
    To yoga, To yogurt, To rice and beans and cheese,
    To leather, To dildos,
    To curry vindaloo,
    To huevos rancheros,
    And Maya Angelou,

    MAUREEN AND COLLINS
    Emotion, Devotion,
    To causing a commotion,
    Creation, Vacation

    MARK
    Mucho masturbation,

    MAUREEN AND COLLINS
    Compassion, To fashion,
    To passion when it's new

    COLLINS
    To Sontag

    ANGEL
    To Sondheim

    OTHERS
    To anything taboo

    COLLINS AND ROGER
    Ginsberg, Dylan, Cunningham, and Cage

    COLLINS
    Lenny bruce

    ROGER
    Langston Hughes

    MAUREEN
    To the stage!

    PERSON #1
    To uta,

    #2
    To buddha

    #3
    Pablo naruda too

    MARK AND MIMI
    Why Dorothy and Toto,
    Went over the rainbow,
    To blow off Auntie Em

    ALL
    La Vie Boheme

    MAUREEN
    And wipe the speakers off before you pack

    JOANNE
    yes, Maureen,

    MAUREEN
    Well, Hurry back!

    MR. GREY
    Sisters?

    MAUREEN
    We're close.

    OTHERS
    Brothers!

    ALL
    Bisexuals, Trisexuals,
    Homo sapiens,
    Carcinogens,
    Hallucinogens, Men
    Pee Wee Herman,
    German wine, Turpentine
    Gertude Stein,Antonioni,
    Bertolucci, Kurosowa,
    "Camina Burna"
    To apathy, To entropy,
    To empathy, ecstacy,
    Vaclav Havel, The Sex Pistols, 8BC,
    To no shame,
    Never playing the fame game.

    COLLINS
    To marijuana!

    ALL
    To sodomy,
    It's between God and me, to S&M

    BENNY
    Waiter, Waiter, Waiter

    ALL
    La Vie Boheme!

    COLLINS
    In honor of the death of Bohemia,
    An impromptu salon will commence immediately
    following dinner....
    Mimi Marquez, clad only in bubble wrap,
    Will perform her famous lawn chair handcuff dance,
    To the sound of iced tea being stirred.

    ROGER
    and Mark Cohen will preview his new documentary,
    About his inabilty to hold an erection,
    On the high holy days.

    MARK
    And Maureen Johnson,
    Back from her spectacular one night engagement
    at the 11th Street lot
    Will sing Native American tribal chants backwards,
    through her vocoder,
    while accompanying herself on the electric cello,
    which she has never studied.

    BENNY
    Your new boyfriend doesn't know about us.

    MIMI
    Theres nothing to know.

    BENNY
    Don't you think that we should discuss.

    MIMI
    It was three months ago.

    BENNY
    He doesn't act like he's with you.

    MIMI
    We're taking it slow.

    BENNY
    Where is he now?

    MIMI
    He's right.... (uhuh)hmm...where'd he go?

    MARK
    And Roger will attempt to write a bittersweet
    devocative song
    (Roger plays)
    That doesn't remind us of Musetta's waltz.

    COLLINS
    Angel Dumott Schunard will model the latest fall fashions from Paris,
    While accompanying herself,
    On the 10 gallon plastic pickle tub.

    ANGEL
    And Collins will recount his exploits as anarchist,
    Including the tale of his successful reprogramming of the MIT
    Virtual Reality equipment to self destruct as it broadcast the words,
    Actual Reality! Act Up! FIGHT AIDS!

    Benny:
    Check!

    MIMI
    Excuse me, did I do something wrong?
    I get invited and ignored,
    All night long

    ROGER
    I've been trying, I'm not lying,
    No one's perfect, I've got baggage

    MIMI
    Life's too short, babe, time is flyin'
    I'm lookin for baggage that goes with mine

    ROGER
    I should tell you

    MIMI
    I've got baggage too,
    Should tell you

    BOTH
    Baggage wine

    ALL
    and beer!

    MIMI
    AZT break

    (MIMI, ROGER, ANGEL, AND COLLINS take pills)

    ROGER
    You?

    MIMI
    Me
    You?

    ROGER
    Mimi