• Once upon a time there was a girl named Goldilocks but she was being a hoe and dyed it brown.So one day when she was trying to find a coffee shop, she ended up at some big-a** house because her sense of direction(apparently) sucks. Goldi went in the house saying "WTF I don't want porridge" and she fed the porridge to a donkey. Goldi rummaged through the cupboard and found it EMPTY. "Nooooo,I want cookies and pudding" She got so pissed off she set off a dynamite in the house and the house exploded before her face. "Awesome..."
    She turned around and started walking but she met up with the bears that lived there. The bears stared at their house wide eyed, then their eyes turned to Goldi.
    "WTF GOLDI!!" Goldi started running and screaming "Molesterrr"
    Unfortunately Goldi was so damn slow and got killed by the bears but atleast the bears had something to eat and EVERYONE(excluding Goldi) lived happily ever after.
    The End.