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He had a normal life. It wasn't anything extraordinary. Yet, many people wanted to be Nasuro Atayashi. That is, except him. Everyone thought his life was smooth and amazing. It was a living hell. Every day, he would come home to his father drinking. Then, a few hours later his mother would come home. His father, in a drunken rage, would yell at her for no reason. He went in his room to shut out the noise. One day, the noise stopped. He went out to talk to his mother. He was shocked at the sight.
"MOTHER!!!! NOOOOoooo..........."
His father had his mother by the hair, her body hanging limp. There was a knife lodged in her throat. Realizing that his son had seen what he had done, his father was ready to get rid of any witnesses. He took the knife from the throat of his wife and lunged. Nasuro sidestepped, but got a graze of the knife on his face. He ran towards the knives and quickly grabbed the nearest one. As his father lunged towards Nasuro determined to kill his son, Nasuro stuck the knife in his father's stomach. Blood seeped from the wound. Nasuro looked at his hands. He saw them as the hands of a murderer. His father staggered away, the blade still lodged within his stomach. As he left, he managed to utter the words:
"I'll get you back one day you son of a b***h! Your mother deserved to die, and so do you! I will find you and hunt you down! I will kill you without mercy or remorse!"
All of this was tuned out by Nasuro, who was deafened by his own emotions. He was enraged, sad, and ready to kill. He turned to his father, still staggering out the door and said nothing. He fell to the ground and began to sob for the loss of his mother.
No one knew of this. As far as anyone else was concerned, Nasuro was a cool kid without a worry in the world. Yet, he had no permanent home. He had no one to take care of him. The only things he had in the unforgiving world were his identity and the knife that nearly killed his father.
- Title: Madness Regent
- Artist: M4mh2
- Description: This is only the 1st part to my story that I am working on. Just want to hear your thoughts on the whole thing before I continue. Remember, constructive criticism.
- Date: 04/07/2010
- Tags: madness regent
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Comments (2 Comments)
- Archaic Druid - 05/02/2010
- Most of your sentences seem to be simple in form, as opposed to complex. While this can be used as a strength to provide emphasis, it would be nice to see some variation in syntax as opposed to "pronoun...verb...noun" repeatedly. Good idea, though.
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- rawr wolf boy - 04/07/2010
- Ohh.. :O I liked it alot! Very nice and unexpected in a way! XD 5/5
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