• Love is patient, love Is kind. Love is also blind.
    Preface
    “I love you” is the three letters used just now. It is just words, it is just words. I kept repeating this in my head, but it wasn’t enough to convince me. I mean, think of each individual word, like I. I meaning themselves as a personally as a person with feelings towards you. Love meaning a word to describe a feeling that is so powerful, its said only to those who truly matter to the person saying it. And lastly, you. It means you as a person being said that, truly matter.
    Now you know the meaning, you should know why I am upset. I wasn’t ready for this! But this isn’t not were it begins. No, the beginning was the end. In fact, it was the day I had to dump my boyfriend. Let me take you back, oh say, the worst day ever sence Edward left Bella in Twilight.
    I’m a straight C student at my school, North Douglaous Academic for the Gifted. (N.D.A.G.) I am not realy that gifted to go to this school, I just practiced violin every day until I exceeded in my regular class and got accepted to this middle school.. My parents were so happy that I would be going to this school because they didn’t aprove of my boyfriend I had at my old school, Dakota.They thought he was bad just because they didn’t aprove of his father, a druggatic in prison.
    But Dakota was a pretty good guy, until 9:56 p.m. when the fatal I.M arrived on the screen of my pink and lime green MAC.

    Daman: You there??
    Xoegurl: Yes,
    Daman: We need to talk…
    Xoegurl: bout what?
    Daman: I feel guilty… about a lot of things.
    Xoegurl: OMG about what? Are u OK?
    Daman: yes, but I hope you will be after this… I have been seeing someone else… while dating you.
    Xoegurl: WTF!!! When?? What?? Who?? What???
    Daman: I have been seeing Mia after school every day sence we’ve dated 4 weeks ago.
    Xoegurl: You F***ER. You are a son of b***h!! Why do you choose to me now that your cheatin on me w my BFF?!! I HATE YOU!!
    Daman: I’m sorry.
    Xoegurl: that’s all you can say?! Why didn’t you just break up w me??
    Daman: Well um I was confused, and its hard to explain, but… Im in love w both of you…
    Xoegurl: If that’s what you call love, then its just a feeling in your pants!! You can have Mia!! Asta la vista mother fuc-Xoegurl has signed out.


    As you can see, my day was already destined for hell the next day. And ironicaly, it was a Monday. Which meant that I had algebra for two hours with both Dakota and Mia at my table. I hadn’t even bothered to talk to Mia. The lying Beyotch! No wonder she was always was saying that Dakota was all worng for me, and when ever I would talk to her about Dakota she would ask first “Are you guys breaking up?”
    I got up that morning to the sound of my alarm clock on my phone blairing Bethovens fith. I groaned reluctantly and and swung my at my desk and of course missed and hit the corner of my navy blue nightstand. I yelped in pain and sprang from my bed. Sighing, I opened my cherry red razor cell and hit “end”. I looked at my now throbbing left hand… with my luck it will leave a big bruise… I thought.
    I showered and dressed in dark wash skinny jeans,a long beaded pink and yellow halter and slipped on my black high top chucks, then stormed down stairs to the kitchen were I popped pop tart in the toaster and turned it on high. I didn’t want to be late and hungry for my “perfect” day ahead . I went to the refrigorator and poured some ornge juice. Then while turn back to the toaster, I tripped on my little brother, who was running towards me and sloshed ornge juice all over the floor!
    “Now look what you made me do!” I exclaimed with dramatic horror. My brother, only two, looked at me with with his perfect hazel eyes and replied;
    “I clean it Zeewee…” His innocence made me slightly nauseated. Why did his life have to be perfect and my life a disaster? And when would he get my name right?
    “Jakey, how many times do I have to tell you? My name is Zzzoey.” I had to emphasized my name for him.
    Ever since he started talking a couple months ago, he never got my name right. And it didn’t help that he had an adorable lisp. He just nodded and ran off. I grungingly cleaned up the mess and relized that my poptart was still in the toaster! Running over to the toaster, my older brother, Keith, came thudding downstairs in a black and white baggy sweater and skinny jeans. His mop of so called greasy brown hair was stuffed into a purple flat bill hat.
    “Nice pants,” I said, referring to his gray skinny jeans, “did you steal them from my room?”
    He rolled his eyes and gave no remark. Lately he’s been to “cool” to make human contact with anyone but his greasy haired friends. I glanced at the kitchen clock, 8:42! I snatched up my burnt pop tart and ran out the door, not bothering to say good bye to my brothers. They didn’t realy care.
    I had to run to my bus stop were I met David, my guy best friend.
    “You’re late,” he said with a smile, flashing green braces at me. “I like your breakfast choice.”
    I replied, “Haha, sooo not in the mood.”
    His face went into genuine concern mode; “What happened?”
    He asked with sincere alarm in his voice. Justin was guy best friend, and the sweetest, most sensitive guy I know.
    I rolled my eyes and tried to pretend it was no big deal, so I said, “ It’s just that Dakota was cheating on me with Mia…And he told me last night.” I smiled wobbly, But he couldn’t be fooled.
    “Are you okay?” he asked quietly.
    I nodded and looked down at my purple high-top chucks. The bus came and I got on after David because we were the only ones at our stop. We lived in a bigger community than anyone else at our school , both of our dads were doctors.
    I walked down the isle and saw David sitting in the back with his backpack in the seat before us so no one would sit there. Something he only did only when he wanted to talk to me. His face was triumphant when I sat down.
    “So do you want to talk about it?” he asked.
    I pondered this for a second and then answered no. David was quiet and then said;
    “That bad, huh?” I nodded and prayed he would understand that I didn’t want to talk about it. And why did he care? I sighed quietly and reached into my Hollister bag to retreave my silver i-Pod.
    “ I loaded up Last resort,” I said with a smile, “like you told me to do.”
    He smiled back and I offered a pink ear bud to him. Last resort was his faveorite song, you know how guys are with their screamo music! I put my ear bud and pressed play, and after Justin was done with his air guitar solo, we sang the lyrics.
    “Cut my life into pieces!…”
    “This is my last resort…!”
    “Suffocation!…”
    “No breathing!…”
    “Don’t give a fu-”
    A shooting pain stabbed my head. My vision blurred, and all I heard was David screaming “Zoey! Zoey, Stop kidding! Zoey…” Something halted abruptly, and then I remember falling… It felt like my head was going to explode, and I couldn’t feel my body. I tried moving, but my legs were numb. Something was spinning, then screaming, shouting. I had enough feeling in my hand to know that someone was holding it.
    Then I was being lifted, and something sharp pierced my arm, I felt like the life in me was being sucked out. I had never prayed so hard in my life. If there was God, why did he make me endure this pain? My vision was blurred and all I could see was something white and red above me, and then unfamiliar faces. Then everything faded, and I was falling into a darkness, trying to scream for someone to save me...

    Chapter one:
    Understanding


    I awoke to the sound of soft weeping. It was so sad I wanted to cry also, but I couldn’t move. My eyes opened slowly, and I had a hard time understanding my surroundings. From what I saw, there was a window to the left of me were my bed was near.I saw that the white blinds had been opened slightly, and
    The walls were a pale blue, with a peeling white flower pattern wall paper. I turned my head and saw a monitor with my heart beat. Looking down I saw an I.V. tube sticking out of my arm, which made my stomach upset at the site, for some reason. Lastly, I looked down to my right side, were a boy with long, dark brown “skater” hair’s head was bent down. His shoulders were shaking, so I put my hand on his head, wanting to comfort him in some way. His head lifted, and I saw a pair of deep green eyes swimming with tears. A tear spilled, and he said, “Xoe?”
    I tried to comprehend what this boy was saying, then it all came back. Pain, darkness, flashing red lights, yelling, then nothing. I scrambled my thoughts and then recognized the boy in front of me.
    “David?” I said with caution.
    “Your awake…” He said. Takeing my hand, he pressed it to his cheek. He started to cry again, and I joined, not knowing why, but it felt good to let it out. I had never seen David cry before, and it was the saddest thing I have ever seen. Eventualy we stopped, So I asked the nagging question in the back of my brain,
    “ What happened?”
    Takeing a shuddering breath, he said,
    “We were on the bus, listening to your i-Pod, and you froze up. I didn’t knotice until you started screaming and crying. The bus driver yelled at you to stop, he didn’t know what was going on at the time, when he didn’t listen at me to stop, I pulled open the emergency door. The door flew open and the bus ran a red light on accedent and another car smashed into us. Our bus started spinning and stopped, were someone called 911.”
    He took another deep breath, and continued.
    “At first they thought that you were injured in the bus accedent, until I explained. You had a C.A.T scan, all the while you were unconscious. They later found out it was from the pain.” He shuddered. I closed my eyes and tried to soak this in.
    “Whats wrong with me?” I asked quietly.
    He answered softly, “ The doctors said that you had a brain tumor that you were born with, and it just started acting up. You‘ve had surgery, and you haven’t been awake for a month. It’s March, Zoey.”
    I said, “ Then answer me this, will I be…okay?”
    “I will always make sure you are safe,” he replied, “ And now that you are awake, I think that you will be just fine.”
    He got up and softly said he was going to go tell the others that I was awake. Before he left, he took my hand, and, to my surprise, kissed me on my cheek!
    “Sorry…” He said, probably mistaking my expression, “It’s just that you looked so… I mean, I am just happy that your with me -us again.”
    I put my hand at the spot were he had kissed me. Confusion, shock, it was all just overwhelming me! He started walking towards the door, and he turned and smiled slightly at me before he left. Thoughts raced me head and I tried to sort them out, until I turned and saw a young girl, about fourteen, sitting in a white hospital bed. Her Brown and balck highlighted hair was puled back into aa sloppy bun, and her bangs swept to the right side of her face. Her face was tear stained, and she had dark circles under her eyes. After two seconds, I relized that girl was me.
    I looked so pitful, that I started to cry again. I cried that I was in the hospital, I cried that my parents had to go through this, and I cried for David. How he must have suffered watching me on the bus, not knowing what to do…
    I heard voices and stopped crying immediately, not wanting any one to see me like this. I saw my mom first, her curly hair pulled into a ratty bun like mine. Then I saw Keith and Jakey, both wearing an uncomfortable expression.
    “Oh, honey!” my mom exclaimed, “You have no idea how worried we were for you!”
    My two brothers just stood there sheepsly, not sure how to act. After about five minutes of hugging, my mom finaly released me and said that she had to go get the docter, so she left with Jakey, leaveing me and Keith alone. I had no idea that things could be so awkward with my brother until that day!
    He shifted his wait uncomfortably, then sat in a chair. Just as I was about to say something, he cleared his throat again and said,
    “That David kid had better lay off.”
    I looked at him incredulously, and replied,
    “ What do you mean, Keith?”
    “Well it’s just that hes been here at your side ever sence you’ve gotten here, he even stayed after he got out of his own bed.”
    “David was hurt?” I asked in alarm.
    “Yeah, kid cracked his skull when the bus got hit, apparently he threw himself on top of you.”
    I didn’t know what to say. I was in awe. Why would he do something like that? For me?
    David continued, “Um yeah, if he wants to be all holding your hand all the time, He’s gonna be answering to me. We practicaly had to use pliers to get him to let go of you before you went into…”
    I understood what he was trying to say, so I didn’t answer knowing this would lead into more awkward conversation. I had enough awkward conversation comeing with Justin! Why’d he throw hiself onto me, to…protect me? That’s kinda weird… I thought that Justin and I were just friends…I think.
    “I’m, uh, just saying that its cute and all that, but he needs to keep his hands off my baby sister…” Keith said shyly with a smile.
    He got up and hugged me, which I was glad for because I needed one at that moment.
    “I should have tubes stuck in me more often if your going to be nice to me.” I said joking, but the way that he winced told me I wasn’t all that funny. He got up and left, just as the docter came in, a middle aged women in her mid thirtys dressed in slacks and a white lab coat.
    Later that after my exam (actualy I was just asked a few questions to see if I had my memory, I hope I passed…) It was about lunch time so my Mom, Dad, and brothers all went down the street to Claim Jumper to eat, and I was left alone in my bedroom, and I have to say that it was a slight relief to have some privacy after everyone was swarming me all morning, but in a way lonely. Somehow the distant sound of the phone running, the beeping of my heart monitor, and the unfamiliar voices weren’t pleasant.
    The nurse brought in a tray of food for me, an apple, a cup of herb tea, and a bowl of brocali soup. Lovely assortmant of food for someone whod had just waken up from a month long nap! I sipped m,y tea and practically inhaled my soup, but left my bruised apple untouched on my blue greasy tray. Half way through my meal,there was a knock on my dooor.
    “Come in,” I said with a slight uncertainty, knowing that I couldn’t stop any one who tried to come in anyways. I saw the door creep open, and a red flat bill hat poked in, then the rest of Justin.
    “Hey, How are you feeling?” He asked cautiously.
    “I’m okay, foods great.” I replied sarcastically.
    “Well, I brought you something..” David said sheepishly.
    He showed me what was behind his back, a gift bag with different shades of blue stripes and white sparkle tissue paper.
    He handed it to me and I pulled the tissue paper away, embarrassed that he got me something. I retreaved a small, black, velvet box, and when opened it I saw a silver heart with a precisely cut small diamond in the corner of the heart, and in the midddle were engraved the words My Love Forever.
    “Oh,” I breathed. I took the neckalace out of the box and saw that on the back was engraved, David And Zoey For Eternity And Forever. Then, unrepentantly, I began to cry. My tears spilled over my cheeks but I wasn’t realy sad. Shocked, yes, but not sad. Then I got pissed.
    “What the hell, David?!” I yelled, a little to loudly, making him jump.
    I continued, “I’m in the ******** hospital and you choose now to hit on me? What the hell!”
    “But…I mean-then, because-” He stuttered.
    “But nothing, a*****e! I’m not vulnerable just because I’m on drugs!” It hurt to strain my voice, and my head was burning.
    His face was so hurt, I started crying again, falling into darkness and confusion…
    Chapter Two
    The New Hope

    My mom told me what happened. David upset me, and it was all I could take. Upset, my a**. He was being a d**k head! I was fustrated, And in the end my mom didn’t allow him in my room. I hated him. Tyring to hit on me like the accedent changed something, that was just weird and creepy!
    There was nothing that happened the next week, just visits from my family and a visit from Andria and Mellissa, both my best friends. They had gossip and guy talk aplenty! It was nice not aveing my family there for once.
    The day I left sucked. That pretty much how to describe it. It was about lunch time, and pouring outside, and did I mention that they wheeled me out in front of these realy hot high school guys who stared. I don’t blame them I was hideous, I was sure. I mean a month and half in the hospital does things to you.
    My mom picked me up, so it was a quiet ride home. I’ve never realy had a strong relationship with my mom, I have always been involved with a sport or my violin. We arrived at our big, yellow, two story house and I pratcicaly jumped out of the car before we stopped I was so anxious to go to my room, check my pet hamester, Bob, and then rest and listen to the roar of the silence. comeing soon- the finished chapter 2 and more!!!