Tear

• Artist: water jake
• Description: a part of a luv story after a man breaks her heart. i wrote cause i was bored.
  Im a guy and im writing as a girl so i dont no wat u will think girls.
• Date: 08/09/2008
• Tags:

Knee deep into the freezing waters of the sea. I look down and see goose bumps start to come up from my skin. I look back up and see the setting sun, the horizon a faint peach color. The still water on my feet feels wonderful, but it can't lighten my saddend mode. Then a tear slides down my face and off my lips. And lands gracefully aswell as silently into the salty water creating a small ripple as it slides into the water and melts into the slowly retreating tide then disappears from sight.

Hope you liked my story, and if you liked it please tell me what you liked about it.

Comments

[Tatina the angle]

That a good start to a story. Will you put the rest on plz.

[PinkDawg]

That's really deep and detailed, write a full story please. biggrin 5/5

[Heart Collision]

Is that really a story? it is more a poem if you turn it into one. just a description doesn't make a story. but I guess it is a pretty sentimental description for a guy.

[DNAngel jake]

1 out of 10

[DNAngel jake]

it wasnt that good detail was ok but it needed more length

[Emo_Frenger]

i love it! 10/10

[Miscellaneous13]

Very nice.
Kagome- You mean 1000/10. 10/1000 is indeed a terrible score.