Journal Entry: Sat May 17, 2008, 8:39 PM
* Mood: Content
* Listening to: Nickleback
* Reading: nothing
* Watching: anime
* Playing: random demos
* Eating: whatever
* Drinking: caffeine ^_^
two years of my life spent for a future of a family but then there it was i don't know why i didn't see it before a brick wall. the car of my life flying 100 mph slammed head on into it. for the past week if spent my time climbing out of that burning wreckage of a car saying "wtf happened"but once i got out and looked at the crash i came to a realization that i have blind and ignorant.
life is not meant for love, nor joy and pleasure. Destiny douse not exist as i have been lead to think. the world we live in now is simple that. "life just is" we are here simple because we are. nothing more or less. Love is priceless, no doubt i am not saying i hate it now. nor am i saying life is worthless. but i realize if spent my entire life looking for an answer for are existence our sole purpose on this fragile planet , now i can not say it is fact but i believe there is none.
we live simple to survive what you make of the world is simple that what you make of it. it is not made to form to your relationship. just because you are happy doesn't mean that is the meaning of life. though i speak to everyone we all know this is really just a message to myself.
I can see the fire in my soul burning me no longer in my heart for love but consuming me,now is that bad is the fact that who i am inside is now who i am outside that i love my family and my friends, is that bad. NO...
my life i spent for the person who no longer cares about me instead something i have been to blind to see appears to me, the life i was throwing away.
were the ******** have i been. Thank you Arielle!!!!!!!!!! you have been the most supportive friend ive ever had were no one else was there for me there you were dragging me out of the rubble. Josh though you are being retartedly emo for the josh i once knew you still are there. i look around and i do not see nobody but everybody. Gena a slight friend was helping me ,why what do i matter to her. Echo's life sucks but as much as she tries to hide it i can see the happiness in her eyes as she looked at me, i know that look it is the look of compassion, caring,friendship were others fall.
i still stand strong, I have not named myself "SOLDIER of fire" for nothing. were others may fall i still stand, thank you for letting me know what is like to be the last man standing. I am not fighting a war but enjoying a war, playing games with the enemy and standing as the last being alive; but ONLY thanks to everyones support thank you all
-Soldier of the Burning Name
Sakua Harioto Community Member 
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