• christmas christmas why is it so happy i wonder
    family friends all around the christmas tree
    haveing a wonderefull time singing laughting smileing
    but me no im in my room locked up hateing all the happyness
    why do i try why do i care why why why
    so many questions so little answers
    if u only knew what made me this way
    i was a happy child but now im dead inside
    every christmas its the same
    everybody alse is haveing a good time
    everyone alse is geting wat they want
    but what am i doing, im just in my room on the computer
    nothing alse nothing alse realy matters to me right now
    family, friends.... heh friends i dont even think their friends
    why try to make them if their only their to hurt u in the end it will all be the same
    if i ever get my spirit back that will be the day pigs fly

    why do i try why do i try
    my christmas spirits gone and its never comeing back
    my heart is black im dead inside
    their is no way to resurrect me from inside its a black hole
    no light escapes its dark its black its dead.....
    ever since that one christmas day im happy im glad and them im mad
    just like that in an instent im mad their is no helping it
    its like a dagger being pierced through your body and not comeing out
    its like getting shot but liveing haveing the pain stuck their forever
    their is no cure for it their is no helping it their is no return from where im at right now
    its a dead end and i will never be ok again it will never be the same
    my hearts black now im dead inside why do i live thats simple
    i live for her... the girl i love without her im nothing with out her im dead inside and out

    Shes the reason i wake up every day
    shes the reason i live
    shes the reason i still love
    shes the reason im still here
    shes the reason why
    the reason why.......
    the reason that im still alive