In TheDarkness

• Artist: Zeelora
• Description: It's basically about a girl who was consumed with trying to keep up with what was"In" that it started to ruin her. The girl had been taken into a new prospective. A prospective that had more truth. The girl made a decision to use the knowledge she had gotten. That girl was me! I did find a place of truth. And in that place, I found the most awesome friends ever!,
• Date: 12/04/2008
• Tags: thedarkness searchingfortruth peace

She walked away from the light
She no longer wanted to fight

She finally had nothing more to say
She now felt it safe to brake away

She left her long forgotten emotions
She could now see the difference in her newly found horizons

One way or another she had a new outlook
She had a new perspective, of what for, she might now look

She knew she would no longer look in the light
She now knew that in the light it was all just a secret fight

She had found her serenity
In a place not sought by many

From the darkness she had been called
She found it very safe and not scary at all

It was from the darkness she found her true few
And it was in the darkness she wanted to stay with the reason of what she now knew

Comments

[Anhelitta De Celine-Val]

amazing.... i like this smile it works 4 a character in my book i'm in the process of writing...5...rate back?

[Zeelora]

Thanks
And I did make some awesome friends who can understand me better!
Haha there not so shallow!

[Asebi]

wow i love it ^^ 5/5
its true when u want to look away from the light and instead turn away and ignore what they say. im glad u found awesome friends and a place of truth ^^ always remember that you will sproud wings and rise above despair

[Zeelora]

Ok thats fine
thank you
but please, I'm not good with criticism! I've had enough of it my whole life from people who don't really know me!

[iBrightScales]

That's good then. If you're writing it for you and not for correctness, then it's absolutely perfect. If you like it, then that's all that matters (I guess?) I was simply stating things that I noticed in order to help you improve, because that's what most poets would like to do.

[Zeelora]

Thanks
oh and Bunnie boy or girl whatever you are I'm sorry you don't like it!
But fortunately <for me> I don't care what you think! I write to express myself in whatever way it comes out, not to impress you or anyone realy for that matter. I'ts more of a personal thing for me!

[iBrightScales]

This does NOT remind me of anything by Robert Frost.
The rhyme scheme is rather annoying, and the meter is off horribly.
2/5.