|
|
|
ugh.. i hate stuff right now. i mean school's okay, oddly, i men you never hear someone in highschool saying schools okay, but it is. i have no homework, and stuff's okay.. sure i can barely stay awake in french, and we have to walk/run in the cold tomorrow, but it's fine there...
but no, i feel pretty shitty. i mena my dad's being stupid "oh well, since you're obviously so busy and don't have time,. or even seem to care about me, mind if i call you tomorrow night, or would that be too much of a waste of time for you?" ******** off.
he's so ******** annoying, and really, at this point i don't give a s**t weather or not i make him feel like crap, he does it to me all the time, so he deserves it. god.. if he WANTED to be appreciated, he'd be worth respecting, but he's just a fat lump that does nothing except dole out cash, and be a jerk.
but that's nto all it is.. i mean i'm feeling a little schitzofranic.. i was fine all day, sad this morning, and now i'm retty bitchy. then again i was bitchy a few hours ago too. so sorry to anyone who ran into me.. i just dont know what it is. SOmething's bugging me, and i can;t place it.
even though i was about to pick up the phone and start screaming at my sister because she was asking my mom for money. She's always telling me not to ask, and i got it the first time. I couldn't go to the mall, i couldn;'t do a bunch of things because we have no money, and yet mal seems to have forgeotten all the yelling she did at me about it. So it's fine for her to ask for $200 after M and D pay for her tuition, rent, concerts, gas for trever driving up, trips to mexico, trips to disney land, medical expences, food, and about everything else. I mean god, i NEVER ask for money because we DON'T HAVE ANY. and then right after my mom was going on, almost crying because she had been working so hard today, but almost crying, and telling her all the bills are due the day before, and a're you sure you can't go next week, i can put it in your bank account if you can wait' , and mal just said no, i need theo money for this weekend. well that's just stupid, mallory, ******** off. we DON'T HAVE MONEY, so if YOU want to go on a vacation, YOU can pay.. you've gone to liek three concerts in the last 2 weeks, and spent about $400 on them. So leave mom out of it. She worked 12 hours straight today, 17 clients.. she's only supposed to have 8!
God she's pissing me off.. my mom was yelling at me alot too, but i completely understand where she's comming from. i mean god, i was trying to get everything done for her, and i hope i didn;'t miss anything else.. but mallory's just being stupid. If it was okay to ask for money i would too, but it's nto so lay off, you have ajob, ans if you aren;t making enough money there, then find a new one. You're being stupid saying you HAVE to work on the island.. so go work at a reasturant somewhere else.
********.
And phill, shut up. a) Love on a biological level is simply a release in chemicals triggered by the sight, smell, or thought of a particular person. The chemical release results in a feeling of euphoria. When not around them you live for the high feeling that accompanies the chemicals. b) You're liek me, so i know how you think, and you THINK You're in 'love' but you're not. sadly, you've just ran across [however subconciously triggared it may be] a streak of desperation, and you THINK i'm made for you..or whatever. But peopl think this everyday, and everyday peopel dreak up, move on, and try dating other people. So why are you any different? So true as things may be, i'm sorry i was harsh to you today, but i just don't think it's possable for your feelings to be sincear, however much you may think they are.
moving on.. i'm hungry, but i can't eat. i just don't want to. The thought's makeing me sick, and i can't think of why. I haven't eaten all day because it's making me think of throwing up. So i don't think i will.. i wonder how long i can go on liek this.. i guess i'll look it up, i have time. 3 weeks. i wonder.. i mean i don't eat much more than a meal a day, two if my mom makes me eat breakfast in front of her.. which she does on wekends. so i suppose i won't make it far with this experament.. pitty. thoes markes all over my arm are gone too now. well except for the one that was caused by the scissors. it's still there and bold. Though it is a weird feeling, it kinda tickles when you start to draw in your arm with safety pins..
still pissed, so i guess i'll go do somethign to take my mind off of it.
.!conoclast. · Fri Sep 29, 2006 @ 01:38am · 1 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|