YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
YourDemonicGoddess
mspltchwdr
that you are alone....
as creepy as this may sound...beleive me, i'm the last person you have to worry about stalking you...but i found this rather interesting.....
well, lets put it this way.....
your descrition of yourself is very....eerily similar to myself. a living contradiction.
feel free to ignore me if you like.
it was just fun to see a kindred spirit for once.....
as creepy as this may sound...beleive me, i'm the last person you have to worry about stalking you...but i found this rather interesting.....
well, lets put it this way.....
your descrition of yourself is very....eerily similar to myself. a living contradiction.
feel free to ignore me if you like.
it was just fun to see a kindred spirit for once.....
I know I'm not completely alone. Well right now I am for the most part. But I know a few others out there like me. And the poem was mostly about my personality disorder. So yeah. No offense but I seriously doubt you have any clue what you're talking about.
try me.
Ever since i was a child i was picked on for my weight problem. eventually i got so mad at my attackers, and my personaity at the time was kind and gentle...i developed a split personality complex...my "other half" was and still is a blood thirsty Rampaging demon. that to this day hautn my mind with images of killing and devoring my family and friends.
and if you don't want to find others like you, then you shouldn't be on a community site like this. especially if your going to be so cynical to one who expresses true addmiration to one such as yourself.
You know dude, I have been recruiting. Join our guild Overlords of the world or something like that. No, we don't post in it often. Why not ? Because I started the guild with my friend who is an Other like us, and he's never on. Why ? Because he shut down after I got kicked out of my moms. Granted it was my fault, but we don't function well when we're alone. Or too far apart for too long. And considering I'm trying to just get by here in this stupid ******** ignorant town of human filth, I told him I was going to be acting more human and try to enjoy living here. He took it the wrong way and never replied. And because he never picks up his ******** phone, we haven't talked since thursday over something absolutely dumb. So I'm a little on edge right now, considering it feels like I had a chunk of my soul ripped out recently. And I've been smoking too much. I've got a hangover and I'm seriously about to kill everyone at my school. So sorry if I came off a bit snappy it just hasn't been a very good ....I don't even know what time frame to use. I just found out it's febuary this morning. Majour ******** shock there. I thought it was january. I'm not thinking like I usually am, and yeah. I'm gonna come off a little bitchy. I just miss my friends, the human and Others. Everyone. Being torn away from everyone I know and care about hurts. Sorry I took it out on you.
No problem.
I'm used to it, and i'll check into your guild, but most likely won't get to it because i have a billion RPs and messages to sift through.
And i know what your going through.
and i have the ability to heal souls, beleve it or not. My soul is like a magenet, and also a nursary. as hectic and demonic as my other half is, i am very polite and kind and over all gentle. My over all exsistance is two things,
to destroy: My original use
And to heal: My seconary use.
so let me know what exactly is bothering you, and i will help.
So your element is healing mm ? Mine's always been fire. I guess what's really bothering me is that I finally tore apart my mind, and got the last of the humanity all in one personality, and now I'm trying to tie my other two together. My beast finally settled down and is accepting the fact she's only there when I need to fight, so I don't have to struggle to hold her down anymore. But with trying to tie my two selves together and having that last dumb one run things while I try to fix myself is annoying. And Mike on top of everything seems to have just given up on trying to stay in contact with me, and that hurts a lot. I have no desire for school and find it harder and harder to drag myself up in the morning. I can't sleep, so when I finally apss out around 3 in the morning I only have a few hours of sleep before school anyway and it just doesn't seem worth it to go. And I don't want to deal with the hurt of missing everyone, so I've been smoking myself stupid and getting drunk to forget. Now I can't feel anything and I feel dead and completely numb inside because I'm so sick of being here.
thast just it. don't be here anymore.
let your mind wander. let your mind think of other things.
what i did, was i made a mask.
make two seperate masks, make tem your demon, and your other.
then take a step back from both of them.
you will realise that the you looking at both of those masks, is the you thats in controll.
those personalities, those seperate minds....they are you, and you are them.
you are all one.
Way ahead of you. I'm tying my two together, the third will always be part of me but only there when need be, and the last I'm either going to destroy or repress and only bring out when I need to.
yeah, but your "tying" them together. mine have "blended" together, they have become a triad of sorts. every part needs the other. My charming and social side needs my Demonic side for stregth, My Demonic and strong side needs my intelectual side for balance, and both the strebgth and the knowledge need the social to be able to reach out to others and have that connection of souls.
Of course I'm working on balance, but blending everything together would make me seem almost human. Screw that. Besides, my mindset's always been a little off. Makes me more emotional and passionet, more sensitive to feelings. I can read people better that way.
that may be, but you can at least sotp poisoning yourself.
it would help all o fus, to have everyone sober enough to think clearly and rationaly. i don't drink or smoke at all, and my mind is open and clear to everything around me. I can tell exatcly what kind of person someone is just by watching them do things that no one else would expect would reveale anything about them. I sometimes do it for fun, and the whole screw being a human part, lose it.
We are all at least a little human.
we can feel, and thats humanity if i ever saw it.
You may very well be an Other, but you're no where near my level. You have some points, but holding onto your humanity is only holding you back. You obviously haven't been understanding all I've said, but that's to be expected.
I understand you perfectly!
having your soul ripped in half and the feeling of another consious overlapping with your own. the fear of losing control to that consciousness and letting the ones around you get hurt. WHat i do understand is the difference between you na dme, is that i had much more humanity to begin with. and that is probably why i'm not as "advanced" as you so elequintly put it.
I'm not advanced, I'm just higher on the foodchain. Heh. But no, the soul-rippidge is just losing Mike. Which I'm currently trying to fix because talking with Others on gaia has driven me to a new point in my insanity. And having more humanity than others, yeah I connect with that. I've always been more passionet then a lot of people, felt more emotion. I have on side devoid of it, one side that is complete emotion, and the rest are sorta inbetween. I'm juggling four personalities right now...and it;s not fun. That's why one is absolutely fine, two I'm tying together, and the last I will repress or something. I'll get there.
evil higher on the "food chain"?
do you know the damage i am capapble of?
Through out my life time....i have hospitalize four seperate individuals...nearly killing two.
And at the swame time, my compasion ipps and tears at my heart because of it. my primal and utter ferocity of being that....thing.....requires me to thirst for blood, and prey on those who harm others. My body has absorbed so much blood...i would not be suprised if my original blood type has been lost. If you were ever to me in real life...i would advise you to refrain to saying that you are "higher on the food chain"
because...you will die.
Oui. Higher on the foodchain. I don't doubt your rampage status, and I've consumed blood as well. Not nearly as much I'm sure, because I refuse to drink from anything tainted. But if you were to ever threaten me, even think of touching me in anyway, either my beast would react, or Mon Ame's would. And he would tear you limb from limb. I'm not going to brag about his...accomplishments. And I'm not using him as a barrier, because I am perfectly capeable fighting my own fights. And I sincerely doubt you could best me in a primal fight if you're holding onto your humanity so dearly.
Becuase i am holding onto that humanity, is what makes my demon that much more ferocious....its like i said before.
i work on a balance.
If one side of my balance is tipped, then the other is affected. My dmon has his oun voice, his oun opinions, and his needs.
needs ofr blood.
I would sooooo love to rip your insolent little throat out, and .............
wait.
this is exactly why....why i n........
i refuse to say it.
help.
Ohhh...but to rip my throat out, you'd have to get close enough first. And I doubt if you got close enough, you'd still want to.. I tend to be rather persuasive.
i can see that.
How so ? You were just speaking of ripping out my throat for my insolence..
...................
you have no idea how much my teeth long to sink themselves into your neck....
to rip through your flesh and devour you.....
but.
I chose to suppress such urges. i understand fully know.
about what you are, about what you pretend to be.
a fool.
a childish, self centered, arrogant, insolent, attention grabbing fool.
the onl real problem you have, s that you don't have an identity of you own, so you make up this fantastic notion that you are split and hve multiple personas.
they are really just masks you wear, to hide the fact that you find your self uninteresting.
Oh you got it. You've figured me out. Yes, you truely are the superiour mind reader here. Right.
You're the arrogant one. You're completely ignorant trying to hold yourself to gether, saying you're like me when you have no idea who I am or what I'm capeable of. You're an impatient wanabe who's only upset because I didn't fall to my knees before you. You call me childish when you've mistaken my playfullness for rudeness. You say I'm self-centered when I've been agreeing with you and discussing your opinions. You say I'm arrogant, and yet I said I was in no way more advanced than you. Insolence is nothing online, because I taunt and tease others whenever I damn please, I even gave you that warning in my profile, which was the whole reason you messeged me. I do NOT seek attention, as, once again, it was YOU who messeged ME. I never said I had a problem, and I do in fact have an identity. The mask statement is the most truthful thing that's spewed from your short-tempered snapping. Yes, I do have my masks. No, my personalites are not my masks, but I am a decent actress, as no one can see past whatever mask I so choose to wear. My true self is only shown to my true friends, those I feel loyal enough to trust, because I know how trust can utterly destroy you if given to the wrong person. I may very well be uniteresting to some, because I just don't feel like dancing around for their general amusement. I am no one's puppet.
You know nothing of me, and you severly overestimate your ability to read others. So next time you feel the urge to lash out, you would do well to keep your sharp comments to yourself and your tongue in your mouth lest I rip it out.
alright fine. the kid gloves are off.....
notice when you say that you had never said you were more advanced than me, when you had blatenly stated that you were "higher up in the food chain" To me, and to anyone else with a working mind, that right there is a statement of superiority that you assume. When in turn you do not have any idea of my strength either. your pitiful atempt to point out my flaws are only increasing your own. and yes, i am the one who messaged you in the first place, but was my intention and greeting spitful or criticle in any way? no, i was simply extending a friendly hand and trying to connect with someone that is so similar. you try and state that you are in no way superioir, and that you have never been condisending, and yet you tell me immediatly afterward that you can do whatever the hell you want, that you "taunt and tease others whenever i damn please, " that is quite the contradiction. and you obviously aren't even keen to what a mask is. you say your a decent actress, and that you wear masks often...and that you show your "true face" to only your close friends.....but .
How do you know which mask is your "real" face.
when you change so many masks, how can you be sure that you are holding onto the right mask, the right face.
I myself have lost track a few tomes as well, not really being the self i thought i was,
When you chose to have a mask for every occasion, and you use them frequently, you become that.
your identity becomes an ever changing array of masks. and you lose yourself entirely.
I think the main difference between you and me is that yes, i am holding onto my humanity.
because i have not givin up.
I have not stopped at my atempt at life. My humanity is important to me.
You however, are giving up. you are basicaly holding up a sgn over your head that says, "Life is too hard for me! I am too much of a weakling to be a normal person!" That is yet wnother sign of imaturaty that you are either flaunting, or just out right oblivious too.
I wasn't refrencing the food chain comment. It's an inside joke between me and my friends. You can never understand it if I wasted years trying to explain. Drop it, it wasn't saying I was better than you. You're a dumbass for taking it literally.
Your strength I don't give a damn about, because in some fights it's wits not bruteness that wins them. No, I'm not saying I'm smarter than you. I don't want you twisting my words and throwing this back in my face.
Pointing out your flaws ? You started it buddy. And by pointing out your flaws I'm only highlighting my own ? What the hell ? You're pointing out all mine, so I guess I can shove that comment right back.
Yeah. You started kind, and I snapped. I even apologized for that and explained a lot of what I was going through, I never open myself to anyone, and just the fact that I told you so much was a sign of slight trust, that yeah, I was sorry for snapping and explained.
Teasing others and acting superiour are completely different. I tease my best friends if I have more cookies than them, but that doesn't make me superiour. Usually my teasing only leads to laughing, joking around. Just because you seem to have no sense of humour isn't my problem. If I'd had this same converstion with just about anyone else, they wouldn't have taking it so personally. I don't try to put anyone down, and my taunting is almost always put lightly, meant to be taken lightly as well.
Contradicting myself. Well gee, I ADMITTED TO THAT ON MY PROFILE. Once again, you're only stating the obvious and proving you have no ******** clue who I am, and therefore no right to tell me what my problems are.
And my masks, you can never understand. I get what you're saying with the losing yourself comment, yeah I've been there in the past. But I have only a few now that I use in the precense of those I don't care for. My true self I can be whenever I'm around those I trust completely. I don't have to act a certain way or shield myself for fear of showing weakness, I can just relax and let everything flow naturally. Something I will never do around you apparently.
And the humanity thing, you're just being thick. Yes, I gave up my humanity. No, it's not a sign of weakness, I am still living and quite content staying alive. I have my own plans, and they do not include acting like an ignorant human, which you have mastered so well. I'm not even going to waste my time explaining because you do not deserve to hear, and you wouldn't understand anyway because you're being such a closed-minded p***k. And excuse me if that sounded superiour, I really don't think myself any higher then you in anything other then maturity, because you started this whole bullshit argument by telling me you'd like to rip out my throat.
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
lighten the ******** up!!!!!!
what are you? four??????????
jeez!
man, you are in serious need of a massage or something!
what do you do, just sit in your room, and think until you lose your mind?
Yes, i am human, andi am demon. but i know how to balance the two.
I would also like to apologize.
i NEVER thought you would be so ******** don't know, serious!
what is your problem anyway?
I'm sorry for showing compasion to someone whom i THOUGHT was similar to me in most ways, which you are!
and it was my mistake for thinking that you were responsible enough to control your anger, but it was indeed me who lost my temper as well.
so for that, i apologize, but man......
lighten up!
Actually I've been pretty calm this whole time, making me able to explain everything to the point of "thinking until I lost my mind" which makes no sense, because if you overthink something, you will just see it from all angles, which I strive to do so I'm not only arguing my side but also acnowledging my oponent's points
The four year old remark. Yeah. I'm just gonna ignore that one.
Once again, the seriousness, on my profile. I said "I have very little patience, so if I get into a serious conversation with you and talk civilly, enjoy it. You're a hell of a lot better off then the last guy I "talked" to." I warned you of my seriousness. Yes, I do tease and joke lightly, but once you start mocking my lifestyle and ideas, I will converse with you in a more serious manor.
I never asked for an apology. You can drop dead.
And the compassion thing, ohhhh yeah. Ripping my throat out for my insolence and sinking your teeth into my flesh is a very friendly conversation. Thank you SO very much for your kindness.
No, you weren't mistaken. I haven been in complete control, because I've been able to completely argue all your points thinking clearly and typing with proper grammar, something you should work on. You were however mistaken that I DID lose my temper, proving ONCE AGAIN!! that you don't know me, and have no idea what you're talking about.
And I will never lighten up because you have proved to me that I cannot trust you, due to moodswings, you bi-polarness, or maybe the fact that you're more unbalanced then you believe yourself to be. This is my mask. I don't let people in who I know will twist my words, or are too stupid to fully grasp the depth of my trust.
you feel better yet?
I don't feel anything, not talking to you anyway.
oh please, chewing me out should have let you release at least a little bit of steam from your little situation with that other guy.
you mean to tell me that alll that ranting didn't help you feel better at all?
damn, i guess that wasn't the best approach.
Oh so that was your brilliant healing technique eh ? Good job genious. You've managed to completely kill all emotional responce when speaking to you. Chewing you out, it started as that. But once the "healing" began, I lost all emotion and was just speaking with cold logic. Ranting doesn't make me feel better until I win the argument. Which I seemed to a few posts up, but by that point I was so numb that I didn't even get the victory rush.
No I guess it wasn't the best approach. And you do realize, it's gonna take months of talking to you to get any feeling whatsoever ? So yeah. If you ever feel like "healing" me again, don't.
And the other guy, I made up with him at the beginning of our argument.
