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Thoughts of an Orphan
Stuff Found On fStation.net 7-04-2011
Sorrows are past.
Prosperous tomorrow is to achieve.
Happiness is present.
Now I am learning to live.
Neither hatred, nor anger,
nor any event to grieve.
Smiles shine on my face.
Now I am learning to live.
Success is running behind.
I am success I believe.
Failures are unknown to me,
Now I am learning to live.
Doubts are out.
Brave heart I perceive.
Fears are disappearing.
Now I am learning to live.
Mediocrity is outdated.
Healthy mind is positive.
Peace prevails everywhere.
Now I am learning to live.
Don't hate me, my Love.
I plead you to forgive.
My heart is full of Love.
Now I am learning to live.
Lord made me the way I am.
I swear, I never deceive.
Bartering is the way of world,
Love is here for all to give.
World will miss me later,
Now I am learning to live.
~ Nimesh Shah ~

Met a stranger by fate
Who knew it would turn into a hate
Saw a stranger hailing in his own rhythm,
Fully drowned in his own life. . .
Not a damn here and not a damn there,
Just his own life. .
Never did he knew that someone's awaiting him
Stranger a shadow of silence,
a shadow of purity,
a shadow of serenity,
a shadow so known
Yet a feeling of a stranger
That the stranger is. . .
Just a traveller,
Just flash of lightning,
To make the moment worthwhile...
And the feeling
That the stranger would pass by
Kept roaring in mind. .
Expected from stranger that
May be he could wash away the deep loneliness of mind
May be he could make silent the muscular waves of nostalgia in my life
But it was just a halucination
That was filled with moments
Similar to sway of palm leaves, or sunlight's glare
To scent of perfume, blooming of daisies
A lush of garden green,a guitar's thrum
Or a butterfly' s flair...
And the stranger left my world without a word
Still present in the world of memories
Haunting me each moment of day
Playing hide and seek with my little mind
Seconds, minutes,days, months and years passed by
And again saw the stranger
And came rushing to mind
Memories of past. . . . .
That were felt, not touched
Told, not explained
Treasured, not experienced again
Memories so safe in the closet of heart. . .
Memories so strong to be melted...
Memories so soft to be crushed like a flower. . .
(by Tanvi)


To dwell...
dwell in the darkness of the ocean...
The waves of pure pain upon a beach of solitude...
The sound of razorblades and extasy...
* Hush...Be quiet now...Dream *
The stars...
Children of my insanity...
Kisses of the martyr...
Protectors of what can not be seen...
Lost forever...
in this Magic Fantasy World...
Lost forever...
never to be heard...
in the Spirits...
in the Ghosts of the Wind...
like a Paper Butterfly...
to pieces...
The Thrall of Love and Lust...
Everything returned to Sand and Dust...
The Magic is Lost...
(by Annelies)


I'm reaching for a flame...
Searching for the light at the end of the tunnel...
But once more all I see is the pitchblack darkness surrounding me...
I'm falling in this endless nightmare...
Can you tell me why I should hold on?
Can you give me a reason to be strong?
Deep inside you're just as numb and clueless as me...
And we both know that the past ain't going to fade...
Can you see why I made those mistakes?
Can you feel how with every breath we take our hearts break?
I'm sorry I didn't wanted to say it...
I still miss you...
But this is one mistake I'll have to bear...
Once more I'm aware of the fact that I went to far...
Have you noticed my fading star tonight?
I'll never be able to shine as bright as the others...
I'm just getting tired of this neverending fight...
(by Annelies)

I'm sitting here in solitude
Disappearing in the motion of the machines
A new world is opened
I see your reaching hand
and decide to run away...
away from this world
your games,my heart
Hypnotised by the cold beauty
of working mechanisms beneath an armour of steel
I call myself Serenity
Captured deep within...
A portret I see,
shattered and torn...
I dive in,
emerge reborn...
The sun's shining in this wasteland...
I'm in a place called Neverend...
I'm a storytelling spiral and
downwarts I go...
A statue by Medusa's eyes
Concrete and Stone,
Solid and Cold as Lies...
I return to dust by the hands of Father Time
Awake from the ashes of a beauty
Pure and True
Awaking to the face of you
I wish I didn't knew...
The monster hidden in the dungeons of the castle...
Trapt in a labyrinth of wicked games
Envoked by you...
(by Annelies)


We walk upon this earth and
follow our uncharted paths...
And once in a while we'll know some regrets...
We always long to give so much to the ones we love.
I've let you down,I'm sorry...
Always searchig for a new thrill,longing to feel
the emotions deep within...
But what if we have none left?
The keys to our heart thrown away
and in solitude we'll long to stay...
I never told you how much I needed you...
And perhaps you'll never know...
What am I to do at this bitter end?
The burning flame hushed to cinders...
With bridges cast aside the cathedral of ice has returned...
Are you the frail strand of hope that I have left?
Or will you become another voice,
another ghost in my clouded past...
(by Annelies)


There comes a time when the meaning of life begins to make sense,
At first it may not,
The sky at first may look dark,
The path one needs to walk down may be hard to see,
Never let a disorder control one’s destiny,
life created will not move forward,
cannot be positive, fulfilling future,
If you let it control your mind, body and soul,
At this point, one cannot give up,
A disorder cannot control,
You control your disorder,
Accept yourself,
Accept your disorder,
Love yourself now and forever,
You were thrown against a corner when you developed epilepsy,
Getting up was not an option,
Now it is,
Today is a new day,
If you stay down life will pass you by,
So help yourself get up,
fight the battle and win,
To win the battle you do not have to stop having seizures,
Winning the battle is teaching you how to live a healthy productive life,
Helping you cope,
Life may not always become what you want them to be,
The road you lead may have some u-turns involved,
Do not fear,
For change can be good,
Follow your path that was laid out for you,
The sun is now shinning,
You can now see your path
There is a plan, a destiny that awaits you,
Do not question your destiny,
Do not ask questions such as “why me?”
Accept the path that has been laid in front of you.
Do not be afraid,
Take one day at a time,
Be proud of who you are,
Walk with courage and your head up high,
Believe in yourself,
Focus on the positive,
For the footsteps imbedded in ground of your new path will become the solid foundation to your future.
(by Santino)

We’re talking about when we met and you say it was easier to fall for me thinking (I'll remember this pause) it was likely I’d be dead by now.


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