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the first time,
i was tired, weak, knees of heat,
i tried to hide it,
they wouldn't like it.
i was sweating,
still dreading,
but wanting it more than anything.
i was scared like a weed,
felt that i had no need,
the fisher cat gave me heed,
on to Alice's tea.

the first time,
i was motionless,
afraid they'd be devotionless,
tired of this hopelessness,
but when it finally came,
i will always love this game.

the very first time,
i loved.