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Tara's Thoughts & Stuff. :O Read if you'd like. You'll probably get bored though. :]

-Illegitimate Retard-
Community Member
My tragedy
“Come in,” a sweet voice arose from the silent room, in response to a knock on the door.
“Good morning, Elliot. I came to drive you to school,” a high pitched male’s voice whispered into the dark.
Elliot groaned, “Connor, you didn’t have to. I was planning on skipping today. I only got two hours of sleep.”
“I’m not going to let you flunk out of school though. Just come on, get dressed and I’ll buy you some breakfast on the way to school,” Connor persuaded. “I’ll be out in the car, waiting.”
Elliot followed Connor to the door and closed it behind him. She skipped into the bathroom and flicked on the light. As she grabbed her hairbrush off the counter and sat on her stool, she heard Connor starting the engine, warming it up. It was late winter after all, but the weather had been warming up lately. She combed her wavy hair and took care of her lavatory responsibilities; brushing her teeth, applying her makeup, and cleaning her face. Jumping up from the stool, Elliot quickly undressed out of her pajamas and into a sweater and jeans.
Connor loudly beeped his car’s horn and jokingly shouted, “Elliot, could you take any longer?”
Hopping as she tied her light pink sneakers, Elliot grabbed her backpack from the kitchen counter. She slipped on her puffy white jacket and walked out into the refreshing morning air. She turned around quickly, locking the chunky padlock on the trailer door. She skipped to Connor’s pale blue car and opened the door gracefully.
“Okay Connor. I’m going to school, but only because you’re already here,” Elliot chuckled. “Well, I think it’s going to be a great day, Con.”
Elliot was always optimistic, which was why Connor loved her personality so much. No matter how bad life treated her, she loved and lived it to the fullest. She always had a smile on her face, even if she was upset. Elliot just loved being happy.
“I’m fine with that. Do you want to get a coffee or something from Dunkin’ Donuts?” Connor asked as he backed into the street.
“Thanks so much, Connor. You’re such a great friend. I wouldn’t mind a coffee and a muffin,” she replied, smiling.
“I just wish we could be more than friends,” mumbled Connor, suddenly gloomy.
“What? Sorry, I didn’t hear that,” Elliot stated, oblivious to his harsh statement.
“All I said was I’ll go in and get it for you,” Connor fibbed.
“Oh thanks again, Con,” Elliot said as she looked out the open car window.
Connor parked his car in the Dunkin’ Donuts parking lot and walked towards the eatery. Elliot stared after him, and slowly closed her eyes. Maybe she could sneak in a few minutes of sleep while she was waiting for her best friend to return. She slowly drifted out of consciousness and started lightly snoring.
Connor walked back to his car ten minutes later, a coffee and bag in his hands. He opened the door, ready to toss the chow over to Elliot. When he realized she was asleep, he just gently pulled her hair away from her face. Her calm snoring gratified him, at least she was getting some snooze time. Connor placed the steaming coffee in the cup-holder and the muffin on the dashboard.
He put the key into the ignition and started driving down the road to school. They still had a lot of time before school started, at least half an hour, Connor estimated. Nearly fifteen minutes into the drive, Elliot stirred in her sleep and opened her eyes slowly, yawning.
“Hey Con. I hope I wasn’t out for too long,” Elliot muttered sleepily as her stomach grumbled. “Oh, guess I’m ready for that food.”
“You were only sleeping for about twenty minutes, besides, you need it. You’re so sleep deprived, Elliot. I wish you would just let me help you out a bit … you have two jobs. They take up all of your time, Elly,” Connor whined, pointing out the food to his hungry comrade.
Connor was the only person who called her Elly. It was their special thing; Connor called her Elly when he really wanted to persuade her. She sat in her seat, chewing the muffin bite by bite, occasionally taking a sip of coffee. Elliot did not know how to reply to Connor’s statement, he always caught her off guard.
“Connor Lee Smith, you know better than to guilt trip me. You know how I am; I don’t need anybody’s help. I’m doing just fine on my own,” she argued numbly, taking a large bite of her banana-nut muffin.
“Elliot, listen to me, please. You got two hours of sleep last night, or should I say this morning? I’m assuming you finished none of your school work; you were too busy working, right? Have you even seen your dad in the last week?” Connor determinedly questioned.
Elliot sighed and turned towards the window. She hated answering his questions, they were always so personal. It’s not like she minded the personal questions, but Connor did it in a way that made her reluctant to answer. He was too pushy sometimes. Okay, he did have a point, she only got a few hours of sleep, and she didn’t finish her work. But still, he was trying to guilt trip her … again. And she was reluctant to even allow the thought in her head, but she hadn’t seen her father in the last week. Actually, she hadn’t seen him for weeks or possibly even a month. Connor was her best friend; shouldn’t he know that she didn’t like his persistent budge into her personal life?
“Connor, drop me off right here, right now,” Elliot ordered, unexpectedly irate.
“Elliot, no not here,” Connor refused. “At least wait ‘til we’re at school to storm off. Or else choose any other place than here.”
Elliot stared at him, and puffed out her cheeks. Connor admitted defeat and slowed and drove to the curb. They were at the local gas station. This was where Elliot’s 19-year-old boyfriend, Jason, worked. Connor didn’t approve of Jason, for a few reasons. Jason was three years older than Elliot, he had anger problems, and he didn’t respect his girlfriend one bit. Connor personally believed Elliot could do a lot better. Jason didn’t deserve such a perfect girl.
“Bye Connor. I’ll see you in school, maybe. Thanks for the ride,” Elliot said, without emotion.
Connor sighed, “Elliot, please try to get to school, for me. And—”
“You can go, dirt bag. She’s here now,” Jason snarled towards Connor.
Connor stared after Elliot, who was walking away with Jason. Jason’s greedy hands were all over Elliot’s hips and body, but he could tell she was reluctant to allow him to touch her that way. She knew that the contact would make Connor jealous though. And once again, Elliot chose her beast of a man over her caring best friend, the friend she’d known for eleven years. They were both juniors in high school now, knowing each other since kindergarten. He drove away, his spirit crushed and limp.
“Elliot Mae Valent. I wish you would just let me help you. You could live at my house, in our guest room. It could be your room. You wouldn’t need two jobs. You’d really be able to live your teenage years, really live them. You’re 16-years-old for God’s sake, you shouldn’t have the life you have. Your life should be flawless, full of fun and frolic. It shouldn’t be like this,” Connor ranted to himself aloud, angrily.
He was practically at the school now. Maybe he’d get into a car accident, maybe he’d never have to see Elliot again. Maybe Jason would hit her too hard – no, no, he wouldn’t even let the thought enter his mind. Who am I kidding though, he thought, I’d never be able to live without her. She was special to Connor, he’d even thought on occasion, that he was … in love with her. Connor quickly erased any and all thoughts from his mind. It would never play out like that, Elliot loved Jason. She would never love Connor, he was not good enough.
Connor pulled into his parking spot at school. He tried to focus solely on school and classes, but his mind wandered too many times. Where was Elliot at this moment? Was she okay? Was she going to skip school?


“Jason, please don’t touch me there. I don’t like it. You’re just drunk and stupid right now,” Elliot complained viciously as Jason forcefully grabbed her hips.
“I’m not drunk, babe. C’mon baby, you know you like it. And if you really don’t want me to do it, then give me a little sugar,” Jason smoothly grinned as he puckered up.
Elliot gave him a quick peck on the cheek and turned away. Jason, infuriated, punched the wall. She shook and walked away slowly, not wanting Jason to hit her. A short, chubby bald man ran into the mechanic’s garage quickly. He took a single look at Jason’s furious expression and bolted out.
“Why won’t you kiss me, Elliot?” Jason asked as his eyes bulged out.
“I’m just not in the mood right now. I’m not your pawn, Jason. So don’t force me to kiss you, it just makes me angry. I mean, I am your girlfriend, isn’t that good enough?” Elliot practically hissed.
Jason grabbed her from behind, and seductively whispered, “C’mon babe, nobody’s gonna know nothin’ about what we do. It’ll be our little secret.”
Elliot fought back, punching and kicking as hard as she could. She wouldn’t dare scream, not unless she wanted to get knocked unconscious. She slapped him in the face, and it resulted in a loud popping noise. Jason stared at her, enraged, and knocked her to the floor.
“Jason, NO! Just stop it right now. I’ll give you a kiss if you want it that bad. But I won’t go any farther than that,” Elliot ferociously yelled.
He kept her pinned to the ground with barely any strength. Jason was at least a foot taller than Elliot, and weighed one hundred pounds more than her. To him, it was like squishing an ant. To Elliot, it was as if cinder blocks were holding her tight to the ground.
“Elliot, honey, I love you so much. You know that. So just give me a little something in return,” Jason slurred his words, Elliot could smell the alcohol on his breath.
Elliot spit in his face and kicked him in his crotch. His large body fell on top of hers as if admitting defeat. But then Jason got up slowly and stretched quickly. Elliot hopped up and tried to run, but Jason’s bulky hands caught her mid-stride.
“Jason, let me go! I don’t want to do anything with you! I want my first time to be special!” Elliot yelled, ready to claw his eyes out.
He hit her in the back of the head with his empty beer bottle. Elliot’s eyes filled up with tears and she faded in and out of reality. She briefly saw Jason, taking off his top and jeans, and saw her own bareness. Then another blow to the head, and she was out.


Connor ran out to his car, and he was completely out of breath. Elliot hadn’t been in school today, he didn’t know what to think of that. As he hopped behind the driver’s seat and put the car into ignition, he tried to remember the scene back at the gas station. Now that he was thinking back … he had smelled alcohol, beer, on Jason’s breath. He knew what Jason was capable of sober, but if he was drunk, anything was possible.
“Oh no! Elliot, oh God no, please! Just be okay, just be okay!” Connor sobbed, very noticeably.
He sped up on the highway towards the gas station. Connor floored it. He was going eighty-five miles an hour, but the limit was sixty. He didn’t care if he was arrested, he just needed to make sure Elliot wasn’t harmed in any way.
The tears were flowing down his face freely. Fumbling for his cell phone with one hand and driving with the other, Connor was a complete wreck. Connor speed-dialed Elliot’s phone, hoping to hear her melodious voice.
“Hello?” It was Elliot.
“Oh Elliot. You’re okay, thank goodness,” Connor cried out with relief.
“Why wouldn’t I be okay?” Elliot tripped over her words, and her voice cracked.
“…Elliot? Something’s wrong. What’s going on?” Connor coughed out.
“Connor. Promise me you won’t get angry, please,” Elliot whispered.
“I can’t promise that, Elliot. You know that. Just tell me,” Connor pleaded.
“Jason went too far with me. But – no, no never mind, Connor,” Elliot began crying.
“Elly, you have to tell me. I’m your best friend, don’t I deserve to know? What did that a*****e Jason do to you?” Connor growled.
“Jason,” Elliot began hesitantly, “raped me. I’m in the hospital right now. He beat me, Connor. I was losing blood, a lot of blood.”
“I’ll kill him,” Connor lost control of his voice, “I’ll make him pay. You don’t deserve that! He—”
“Shhh, shhh, Connor. He’s here with me now. He apologized and said he would never hurt me again. It’s all right,” interrupted the gentle voice.
“What?” Connor choked, “You … forgave that heartless jerk? Why? He stole your innocence. He could have killed you!”
“He was just drunk, alcohol made him like that. It’s okay now, Connor. He apologized, and now everything is okay. I’m sorry, but I’ll talk to you later. Okay?” Elliot sweetly sang.
Connor hung up the phone. He didn’t need to hear any more of it. She obviously didn’t need Connor, she had the great, amazing Jason. He was perfect, what other kind of man would rape her and beat her, and then apologize?, Connor sourly thought. Jason was perfect for Elliot.
Connor no longer cared about life. He was just a pawn, to Elliot, to everybody. When Elliot didn’t have Jason to cling onto, she could just use Connor. He was like a tissue; as soon as she was done with him, she would throw him away. Connor knew exactly what he would do. Picking up the phone, he let out an amused chortle.
“Elliot,” Connor stated simply over the phone.
“Oh hi, Connor. I can’t really talk right now,” Elliot laughed.
“No, Elliot. Just talk to me for five minutes. That’s all I need,” begged Connor, emotionlessly.
“Fine, but only because you asked,” the voice rang, musically. “Now, what is so urgent?”
“I just wanted you to know that I used to love you. For all I know, I might still. I don’t know, I don’t feel anymore. Oh wow, look over there, an oncoming car. Maybe I should swerve to the opposite side of the road. What do you think, Elly?” Connor snarled.
“Connor, what’s wrong with you? Don’t do that, you’re my best friend. Don’t be stupid! I need you!” Elliot cried out.
“Well, I don’t believe you. You’re a selfish, stupid bimbo. I’ve loved you for years, Elliot. YEARS!” Connor sobbed.
“I’m sorry, Connor! I never realized it. But I love Jason. I love Jason,” Elliot stated, confused and desperate.
“I just wanted you to be with me in my final moments, Elly Mae. I’ll see you in hell, I guess,” Connor said slyly.
He drove onto the opposite side of the road; he could see a sixteen wheeler about a mile out on the straight stretch of highway. Connor dropped his phone onto the passenger’s seat. All he heard was screaming, lots of screaming. He floored the tiny car. Maybe death would be like a roller coaster, as in, at goes by so fast, you don’t realize it’s happening. But maybe it wouldn’t, and that’s what Connor wanted. He wanted Elliot to hear his screams of agony, she deserved it. She deserved it more than he deserved her. A few more minutes, and he would be forever gone.
Suddenly, he heard Elliot scream, “I’m in love with you, Connor. I am in love with you!”
He scrambled quickly for the phone, and his eyes lit up; she wasn’t desperate to just save his life. Well she was desperate to save his life, but not so desperate as to lie. Elliot’s voice was the most beautiful thing he’d ever heard. And she was the most beautiful person he’d ever seen. As she screamed at him through the phone, he pictured her wavy reddish brown hair flowing with the breeze. Connor saw her bright cerulean eyes, they were like oceans waves, rippling slowly. Of course, he thought, an epiphany in the middle of the road, minutes, maybe even seconds before death would arrive.
“Elliot, I’m so sorry. I just…I love you. I’m in love with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you!” Connor spit out, as he slowed down his vehicle.
“Connor. I love you too. I just realized it, but I’d choose you over Jason any day. Please, come to me. I just want to see you again. Are you safe?” Elliot cried out.
Connor would not lie to her. He would never do that, nor would he torture her. He turned off his phone with a speedy click and threw it out of his window. Connor would not let this haunt her.


She was being honest. Jason would kill her if he heard her say that, but he was in the bathroom. Elliot really did want to spend her life with Connor, Jason was just a fling. Nothing but a fling. Elliot waited for Connor to respond, but didn’t hear a sound. Two minutes passed, and still nobody answered.
She redialed Connor’s number, suddenly full of optimism and thinking about her future life with Connor. Nobody answered the phone. Elliot decided to call Connor’s mother, she would definitely answer. One minute slipped away quickly, and the phone continued ringing. Elliot was nauseous now, ready to throw up. She must have redialed the number fifty times, but nothing ensued, except for blank ringing. Jason came back into the room, a devious smile across his face.
“Hey, baby, how are you doing?” Jason asked as he caressed Elliot’s face.
“Jason, please don’t touch me right now,” Elliot weakly whispered.
Elliot was uncomfortable with her boyfriend touching her, as weird as it sounded. He was just too aggressive; he was not passionate when he touched her. The fact that he had taken advantage of her only worsened the awkwardness. Elliot was working on the courage to tell Jason off, but she didn’t know what would happen. She didn’t care though, she just wanted to put him in his place. Jason continued touching her.
“Jason. Don’t touch me. I don’t love you. I don’t want you. Just go away,” Elliot sternly declared, fire in her eyes.
“Elly baby—” Jason began.
“Don’t call me that, you jerk! I don’t want to see your ugly face ever again!” Elliot practically screamed.
Jason began crawling on top of Elliot, but she shrieked and grabbed the nearest weapon. It was a scalpel, a sharp, dangerous scalpel, thought Elliot maliciously. Jason was once again disrobing both himself and Elliot, a scene she had gotten too used to. Before Jason could begin to remove Elliot’s hospital gown, she jabbed the sharp object into his chest, aiming for the heart.
Nurses scrambled into the room as soon as they heard Jason’s tortured yelp. The scene they walked into was not pretty. Jason was on the ground, clutching his chest. Blood was profusely escaping his body. A calm looking Elliot sat on her hospital bed, examining the freshly bloody scalpel. The crimson liquid covered the top half of her gown and her sheets were speckled red. Jason was screaming profanities at the top of his lungs. Five nurses gathered around him and began healing him, bandaging him up. Another nurse stood in the doorway, too shocked to move.
“What the hell is going on?” the blonde nurse yelled out, terrified.
“That b*****d right there,” Elliot motioned towards Jason, tranquilly, “tried to rape me again. I wasn’t about to allow that.”
“So you stabbed him?!?” the nurse screamed, astounded.
“I’m not physically strong enough to hold him off. It was the only way to keep him off of me!” Elliot defended.
Connor would be so proud of her when he found out. They would be so happy together, she couldn’t wait to see him.


“Hello, Linda?” Elliot asked Connor’s mother.
“Elliot?” the woman wept.
“Yes, it’s me. Hello, is Connor home?” she sweetly said.
“Elliot, don’t you know what happened?” she sobbed loudly. “Connor got into a car accident.”
“Oh no,” was all Elliot could mumble
“He’s d-d-d-ead, Elliot! He’s DEAD!” shrieked the mother.
“NO! No, he can’t be dead. He just can’t be!” Elliot yelled, sorrow and anger filled her voice.
“My son, my only son! His car was completely run over and demolished by a sixteen wheeler on the highway. He didn’t deserve this! He was the perfect little boy,” the mother cried aloud with grief.
“I have to g-g-go,” Elliot stumbled with her words, tears rolling down her face. “Goodbye Linda.”
Elliot would never live this down. She knew exactly what Connor had done. She knew exactly why he had never answered her. He didn’t want her to hear the crunch as his car was flattened by the huge truck. Connor didn’t want to torture her like that. She was grateful of what he had done, but if only he hadn’t given up hope so quickly. It was all her fault, all her fault!


A week later, Elliot was still in the hospital. Linda had brought her back, because Elliot had attempted suicide. She had tried to hang herself, but luckily, Linda had come over to her trailer at the exact time. She had come to bring Elliot to Connor’s funeral. She had found Elliot hanging, but she was still breathing, though not much. Linda had gotten the whole story from the crazed Elliot. Jason was in lock-up now, prison. He had survived Elliot’s demented assault.
Elliot had found out she was pregnant also, Jason was the father. She was going to go through with the pregnancy. Linda would help her raise the child. Her future was looking slightly bright, although, with Connor, her life would have been perfect.


The baby has been born. It is a boy, named Connor. There’s an issue though, he is left without a mother. A short while after being born, Elliot finally killed herself. She was going through postpartum depression, and nobody recognized the symptoms. Now, the baby Connor is left with Linda. Jason will never have custody of the child, Linda will make sure of that. A whole life of dreams for the baby boy has been shattered. Life for him will never be perfect.

Feel free to leave comments or anything.

I hope you enjoyed the story wink

Sorry I just noticed none of my paragraphs are indented gonk
So .... yeah. Sorry about that.

User Comments: [1]
Sound and Light
Community Member
comment Commented on: Tue Nov 04, 2008 @ 04:46pm
That was a really sad story.


Good job.

You're really good at setting up the tension.

User Comments: [1]
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