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Bleh worthless.


Tragedy, belittlement, hate, thought circle, mindset. I don’t even care what these words mean anymore. To me they are just words on a page that are forever turning. Just as my mind is forever wandering down a path which I can’t follow forever. Sooner or later I’ll reach a crossroad or it’ll just end and construction will begin again. I don’t know where I am. I don’t know where I am going.
I wonder what would happen… If one day I told them what’s really wrong with me. That at the end of each day the only thing I think of is suicide… Ending it all. Not thinking about anything. Just white. That every time I resist that beautiful white light. I become weaker and more likely to give into my temptation.
That which is happiness only brings me sorrow. The way they all just walk around, thinking about how there life is so horrible… And how they wish to kill themselves. The way they think they are emo just because they write it down and act the part. Only because they write meaningless poetry about being heartbroken. At least they had someone once and another time again. Maybe if they weren’t psycho analyzing that s**t, always asking themselves when it‘s going to end. They should have been enjoying the time they had.
They walk around so beautiful in their little black clothing because they think it’s a statement… Is it really? I walk around with colors to try and forget the fact that I feel so dull inside… You say you wish to bleed… Why don’t they? I’d because they are afraid. Afraid their little lives are going to end and they are going to miss out on something important because they know they have something important planned. Can you believe that? Can you really? I mean. Some people are still living because they haven’t had the courage to just end it… To end there pain because pain is all they know. How could they accept the happiness of heaven? Or the burning of hell?
They can’t that’s the only reason their lives go on because they don’t know what else there is.