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domokun


Sara Lee Cheesecake
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Just a test post, ignore me...
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"Some people think luxury is the opposite of poverty.
It is not.
It is the opposite of vulgarity." -- Coco Chanel


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The one time Bianca ignored the need to be ladylike was in the case of her morning coffee. Before Regulus had even sat down, or spoken, Bianca had inhaled two cups and was in the process of drinking another. She had seen Regulus at functions, as well as his more attractive older brother. It was a pity Sirius had to become a blood traitor. She really did enjoy his antics, even if she largely viewed them from a distance. But, she liked Regulus, and felt he probably wasn't as evil or vicious as his cousins. Yes, she was from the pureblood elite, and yes she put up a facade of having strong views on blood purity, but there was a reason she shied away from Narcissa or Bellatrix, and especially Lucius. That, and Lucius had refused her advances one too many times. Oh well, if he wanted to marry some girl that was practically his clone, he could. She would find a less eerily similar match for herself. It was entirely his loss anyway.

"Now that I've had my coffee, I feel absolutely chipper," She said in response to Jacqueline. She felt miserable, and that feeling had been growing the more she came to know the Muggle world and its own unique set of wonders. But her bright, cheery disposition did well to hide that. Only the most perceptive people would pick up on the lie of it, and she sometimes suspected that Jacqueline was one of those people.

It was a pity she hadn't gotten to know Jacqueline better, but hey, no time like the present to fix all of that. And, she was feeling at least warm and congenial. It was a sharp contrast to who she was two years ago. Before, she pretended to be so. Now, when people saw her warmth, it was actually honest.

That boy would ruin her.

"But, I hope you weren't kept up too late due to unpleasant circumstances," Bianca added. "I dislike the idea of either of you miserable." As miserable as she was, in the depths of her despair. Right now she was practically glowing, but she knew that would wear off within a few days as she remembered her place in society. Pretty, but vapid. A nice trophy, and educated enough to be a good resource to her future husband. Rightfully snobbish.

The last part, honestly, was the part she liked the least. She had nothing against people like Severus, who were poor and half-blood, or people like Lily Evans, who was a Muggle-Born and had more skill in her little finger than Bianca had in her entire body. They just didn't have her privilege. She felt a little sorry for them in that way, but they had proved their worth in society in leaps and bounds.

What right did she have, to being snobbish? Sure, she had privilege that she was born with, but she had done little to earn it. However, she wasn't about to mess up one of her only assets in society by being soft.

She put away all of her self-deprecating thoughts, and smiled very prettily, very vapidly, very shallowly at Jacqueline, Regulus, and Malik. They didn't need to be bothered by her thoughts.




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“Every woman should have four pets in her life.
A mink in her closet,
a jaguar in her garage,
a tiger in her bed,
and a jackass who pays for everything.” -- Paris Hilton


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Mother of God
I haven't posted in years.

I can tell. Last time I posted was when Rob was a good guy and I was in high school.

Lots has changed. I've changed. Rob was a d**k. All you need to know.



Sara Lee Cheesecake
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dev1



Sara Lee Cheesecake
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Stupid.
I'm so stupid.

I had been doing so well...being so nice...even when I wanted to say the meanest things in the world to him. He, who deserves my scathing insults the least. I don't mean to be so mean to him...I can't help it. When I don't get what I want, I do what I can to get it, which often involves subtly pressuring people to do what I want. I'm so mean. I hate it. I've been trying so hard not to be mean to him, since he never deserves it...

I was doing so well.

I should just tell him I'm disappointed that he can't go, rather than act like a brat.

Then, I wouldn't hear things like, "I could just give you the dagger now, so you can cut out my heart physically, instead of metaphorically. It'd be way cooler, anyway."

I'm such a b***h. I don't deserve such a great guy.





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Shallowness
This started out as a response to someone's note, where he was satirically explaining Religion and Creationism. That offended some people, and an argument ensued. Then, I intended to write a short response, but it became a long response about shallowness.

I took out the first part, since it was only pertinent to the discussion.

Here we go:

To me, differences in religion (as well as other differences) are like differences in...say...you're favorite flavor of ice cream. Thinking of it that way: getting angry at someone for their favorite flavor being…rocky road instead of chocolate chip mint, for example, is a tad illogical. They still like ice cream, and isn't that reason enough to see past the superficiality of difference of "favorite flavor", so to speak, to who they really are?

I know, I leave myself open to much criticism by posting this. I bash you all for being immature, then say that real maturity would be to let the issue die and to just not post on this thread…by posting on the thread. A tad bit counterintuitive, yes. But I thought I should lend my whole extra year of life experience to help quell the anger a bit and hopefully help mend any hurt feelings.

After all, in the end, isn’t religion just another superficial thing people use to discriminate against others? If you automatically are prejudiced against others based on their stance on religion, it leaves you open to prejudice yourself. Anyone can discriminate against you just as easily as you discriminate against others, for things ten times as superficial as religion. You are not as wonderful or righteous as to leave yourself out of harm’s way from other people’s discrimination. Wouldn’t you rather people judge you on who you are as a person?

Have the wisdom, my friends, to know when to fight and what is worth fighting about. Have the wisdom to realize what is worth your anger or your tears. For your own sakes, do not get mad at a friend or lose someone’s respect because you can’t get over your own personal bias. The best way to free yourself from the shackles of needless bigotry against you is to free yourself of whatever bigotries you have toward others.

I was born with the right half of my face paralyzed, and if life has taught me anything, it is that people are superficial. People will take any little thing about you to pick you apart, to ruin you as a person in their eyes, often to make they feel better as a person. The reason I seem so strong and confident as a person to, I guess, many people, is because I was simply never truly allowed to fit in with my peers. I am not afraid to be myself simply because I was never accepted, even when I tried to fit in. Eventually, I stopped caring. If it took so much effort to fit in, only for that effort to fail, why don’t I just be myself and make do with what I get? While many people would find my life experiences as a just reason to treat others like crap and not care, I have learned some valuable lessons through my life.

One of the most important truths I have come to understand is the reason WHY people are superficial. I know, I can be somewhat superficial myself at times. I fall into that trap occasionally, as much as I try not to. I’m not perfect. I realize, however, that it is much easier to judge someone we don’t know. I find it damned near impossible to say anything truly hateful about anybody I like, and I like nearly everybody I get to know, in some way or another. There are very few people in this world I dislike. I’m even making peace with my dreaded Yearbook Partner. The only people I truly dislike are people who have done something to me personally.

Anyway, back to my point. Before you get to know someone, they are just a name and a face; a serial code in your mind identifying them as a living organism, but nothing else. The moment you start talking to them, start getting to know them, they cease to be that “serial code” and start becoming a human being. In your mind, they go from being a blank slab of marble, to the basic shape as a human being. As you get to know them, you sculpt them in your mind into something more and more human, until they have a face just like yours, a human body just like yours. It is once they cease to be an organism and become a human being that shallow discrimination is no longer possible.

They are no longer just a name, a face, and a body. They are a mind, a heart, and a soul.

Most people are not truly superficial; they just do not care for anyone they have not truly identified as “human” yet.

How do we avoid this habit of ours?

Rather than find yourself in a trap of assigning worth to those who “deserve” it, rise above the worst parts of your human nature and try to think of everyone as a human. Try to understand why someone thinks the way they do, or believes what they believe. Then, when you are truly able to understand everybody as a human being, will your superficial human nature be no longer a problem.



Sara Lee Cheesecake
Community Member
dev1



Sara Lee Cheesecake
Community Member
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God damn you.
God damn you. You don't know who you are but right now you...Just gah. You don't know, do you? Not a clue how I really feel, do you? I adore you, love you dearly...and yes, I know how ridiculous me being frustrated with you over this but jeeez...

And that's how I feel, vague as it is. Joy.





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********
[********

******** ******** ********

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********' ******** ******** ******** ********]

[********]

That's all I have to say right now.



Sara Lee Cheesecake
Community Member
dev1



Sara Lee Cheesecake
Community Member
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Don't you just hate it when...
Thoughts of whatever current romantic relationship comes up (whatever the status you're at with that person) and you're alone with your thoughts...and all of your insecurities and fears regarding that relationship come to the surface?

I keep them hidden, I keep all of my true feelings, wants, and opinions behind a mask of constant cheerfulness. It's hard for me to tell anyone anything to their face. I never can express what I mean fully in spoken words. It also scares me. Getting close to people in general scares me to death. It's not that I WANT to be completely untrusting of everyone and everything, but...it's hard. People have never really been good to me in the past, so it's harder for me to open up to people. I may seem confident and self-assured, but inside I'm very shy.

I worry that I'm not good enough. I'm not very pretty at all and I'm rather rude, disrespectful, annoying, slow, spastic, bitchy, slow...I'm also afraid of getting in any sort of relationship and it's hard for me to trust anyone to boot. I'll constantly have to be reassured of my worth to him...

Also, I met this guy online. He's DETERMINED to meet me, which is INCREDIBLY sweet since he has to save up his own money to get enough to come see me but then my worries of not getting along with him in real life surface. I would have wasted his money if he came only to find out that we were really totally incompatible. I wouldn't want to do that...

My fears envelope me sometimes, stay to the side other times. Luckily right now they're staying to the side.

NOW FOR SOME FOOD pirate





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Da da da DAAA!
I had, like, five blogs. Or four. I can't remember. But I deleted my Myspace anyway, so if any of my Gaia friends on Myspace wonder, that's what happened. My feet fell asleep.

So now I'm posting on this one...on my buddy Amanda's computer...in Moses Lake...which is almost three hours away from my house...


BUT I LIKE IT HERE.


heart FURUBA heart
heart WATANUKI heart
heart HATORI heart
heart heart heart WATANUKIIIIII! heart heart heart



Sara Lee Cheesecake
Community Member
dev1


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