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I don't have a problem

No ones home. Finally I have a chance to eat. It's not like I didn't have the chance to eat before... I just, I can't. Not infront of them, I can't eat infront of people. Shes gone to Doctors, hes gone to work. No one is in the house but me.

I open the door to the fridge...oh god. Strawberries and sugar, Hershy Kisses, French fries, Chips, Salsa, M&Ms... where do I begin? Where do I start? The corn dogs. Those fat, greasy veggie meats on a stick. Thats where I begin. Wrapping my tounge around it, setting my taste buds in a frenzy... It tastes good. Very good. The best part is, no one sees me. I just eat. Eatting is so great. I don't think about the after math, what its doing to my body. I think about how every bite hits my dopamene, getting me high on happiness every time. Yes, so happy. The chocolate meltng in my mouth, the corn dogs sliding down my throat, the strawberries bursting flavor in my mouth... It may not sound great to you, but boy was it for me.

I sit there, looking around myself. I see wrappers, stawrberry tops, sugar crumbs. I feel so guilty. Why is it, the one thing that makes me so happy, hurts me worst? Why? Oh god why do you do it? I look down at my belly, fatly buldging, so gross. I feel so upset with myself, I grab the fat, wishing I could just, yank it off. Why do I have to be so ugly? Why do I have to be so....fat? Why god? Why me?

I get up, wipe the crmbs off of me and tie my hair up in a bin. Can't get that dirty. I walk into the bathroom and lock the door, and turn on the vent and sink, making as much noise as possible so my gagging can't be heard. I walk over to the toilette and sit down nxt to it. I lick my right first two fingers, getting them wet so I can slide them down my throat easily. I look into the toilette, taking off my glasses I brace myself. I slide my fingers down my throat once, getting my body ready for whats about to happen to it. I think of discusting things, throw up, urine, The c** of my rapist that was swishing in my mouth that one night. I do it again, pushing firthure down. My body reacting as it usually does when i do it time and time again. Forcing my self to gag up all the food. I first taste the last thing I ate. Throwing up the strawberries and sugar, seeing the red juices swirl around Again and again I throw up,m pushing into my throat, then the chocolate, then the corn dogs. The taste mixed together is horrible, making my tunge twist in discust, which only makes my gag harder and throw up more.

Finally, I get up and flush the toilete, the swirls of colors gowning down. I stand up, put on my glasses and take down my hair. Spitting, and brushing my teeth I walk into the living room and lay down. It used to be for attention. I used to not do it at all and just say I did, hopefully it would make me cooler... how stupid. But now I really do, and it's no joke, and I don't tell any one. Not even myself. Because I don't have a problem, I never did.

Conservative Vrs Liberal

Ok, I was searching through the boards on the Chatter box, looking for anything interesting to take a look at and I saw some one with a siggy that said “Politics are evil, don’t believe anything.”

I found this rather fascinating. This person I hope reads this because I’d like to say, that person is totally clueless. Politics aren’t evil. /Some/ of the people, if not most, in them are. The act and practice of politics is not to blame. Politics is the simple act of working on our government and economy. This can swing either was depending on the person(s) in it. It could hurt us severely or it could help us. I personally am more on the Liberal (democratic) side, but I’m remaining Independent on a few things. Republicans, far right Republicans, I must confess, aggravate me. They annoy me really. Half of them say things I find absolutely ridiculous. Such as abortion is wrong. I asked this one Woman who is a far right Conservative about this subject. She replied this: “The mother s the selfish one you had sex, why should the child suffer by not being allowed a life?” This I must say makes sense, and is an interesting way to look at it. But another thing I think about is, it’s not always the woman’s fault! They immediately think it is because we’re the one’s who need to keep our legs shut. Well, think about this. A 14 year old girl is raped by her father and she becomes pregnant. She is denied an education and the life she had been working so hard to achieve. Is that her fault? No. She should be aloud to have an abortion. It’s her body and she will not be able to live her life the way she was meant to just because of her father’s selfish and twisted actions. Don’t you think she should be allowed to live the way she wishes? Some may say she’s different and should be allowed to, but no other woman where it is their fault should. Oh! That’s smart! How bout we have a little quiz for all the woman wanting to get an abortion.
1) Did you get raped?
2) Where you a dirty slut and ******** some guy?
3) How did it feel?

Brilliant idea! Now, not only do we not have the right to decide what happens to our body, but now we don’t have the right to our privacy! -_-;;; Well then. My case is settled.
That’s only one thing with I disagree with. There are MANY others.

--More comming, just too lazy right now to typeth them--