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Haven't posted a journal in a while... |
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Yeah, I know there probably aren't going to be many - if any - people that'll read this, but I just need to pour out a little emotion for the third or fourth time in my life (don't worry, it's not a bad thing)
Okay, well, there's this guy (let us call him Gato (and yes, that is the Spanish word for "cat" wink ) I've been crushing on for several months this year, and for a while last year, and I think I might finally getting up the nerve to ask him out or to just say something to him - maybe just invite him to a movie or whatever. He's really smart, nice, and - in my opinion - cute. He likes a lot of the same music I do, plays the same games (video games, mind you), and lives about as sedentary a lifestyle as I do. Oh, and he hunts. Pheasants, for the most part. I think he might like me, too, but I'm not sure. He used to always let me borrow his iPod in study hall (the only reason he stopped was because I started bringing mine sweatdrop ) and he usually sides with me when my nerd friends and I are trying to decide what to do, but I don't know whether that's affection or if he just likes me as a friend. *sigh* I just wish I could read his mind for, like, one instant so I could know whether or not to pursue it.
If anyone reads this, lemme know what you think. Sometimes it seems like I think so logically that I'll never make my heart as happy as my head. As a great man once sung, "Do I trust my heart or just my mind?" That's my question.
Currently listening to: "Can't Finish What You Started" Motion City Soundtrack
 ghostmelody · Tue Nov 20, 2007 @ 01:16am · 0 Comments |
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Something that needs to be said |
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Currently working on: Babylon
Pages: 30
Chapters: 4
Words: Approx. 19,700
I know some people might be pissed to read this, but it's true - I've begun work on a new story. Now I know some people REALLY got into Virtue and that's really cool - I'm glad you liked it so much, but therein lies the problem - I didn't. No, I'm not being all elitist or whatever, and I'm not being overly hard on myself, but the truth is I set myself up to do a lot more work than I honestly could. I mean, write an entire trilogy when I've never even finished an entire novel? I was setting my sights WAY too high. So basically, I wrote up a list of pros and cons to do with the story, and it turned out a lot like this:
PROS:
1. People who enjoy reading the story will continue to read it
2. I can claim that I have tenacity and am actually capable of following through on something
3. An in-depth mythology and an ending that has actually been planned out
CONS:
1. Attention-consuming-ness
2. Only appeals to people of one fan-base; if you don't like MCR, it wouldn't be very interesting
3. The character's personalities are poorly developed - if you didn't know the band, you wouldn't know what kind of personality to paint on them
4. I still have over A BOOK AND A HALF TO WRITE
5. I have a lot more, a lot better ideas
6. It would be hard to publish a book that was originally meant as a mass-appealing fanfiction
7. Ridiculous twists and plot holes
8. Too many characters to keep track of, and there's not even a real main character!
9. Completely unrealistic personalities and actions
And lastly: 10. It's getting BORING - not to read, but to write - REALLY boring. I know the characters too much, I've been 'around' them too long. I need some fresh blood, some original creations, a mythology and a story I can completely claim as my own without disclaimers or excuses.
I hope the people that read this will be able to accept - if not completely understand - my decision. I know a lot of people might have liked my previous story, but I can promise you: if you liked that writing style enough to be upset by this, then you'll like the new stuff I'm working on a HELL OF A LOT MORE. There's much more depth, much more scene-setting, and much more emotion. It might share a few elements with Virtue, but overall, you'll find it's an entirely different sort of narrative (for one thing, it's actually written in 1st person (!!!)) and a much different sense of thrall.
Okay, my rant is finished. If you have anything you need to tell me or - even after reading this, you still need to vent some aggression about the death of Virtue - you're more than welcome to say it. Just PM me or leave a comment on this entry and I'll do my best to get back to you.
With peace, love, and a still-beating heart,
FAMINE
Currently listening to: "Stare At The Sun (Live)" Thrice
ghostmelody · Sun Sep 09, 2007 @ 05:36pm · 0 Comments |
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Currently working on: Descent (book 2 of 3)
Pages: 85/86
Chapters: 13/14
Words: Approx. 47,100 (words in trilogy: approx. 165,800)
Grr... chapter 13 is really bugging me. I don't like the ending (and NO, it's not THAT part of Ch. 13... it's the second half..), so I'm going to skip over it for now and go back to it later, so I can at least get something written. Curse me xp
Currently listening to: "Headlights" The Classic Crime (<-- this and MCR's "Cancer" might be two of the saddest songs I know)
ghostmelody · Fri May 04, 2007 @ 01:30am · 0 Comments |
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Yes, well, I had an MCR dream last night and I woke up around 4:30 at night because of it, but it was totally worth it. I followed my brother's example and wrote the dream down so I wouldn't forget it and it helps a TON.
Alright, here's what I wrote:
Not sure exactly what the setup was, but I believe it was Frank, Gerard, and Mikey (and/or Bob) that needed a ride to a gig they were playing nearby (we lived in some town I didn't recognize - looked Jersey-esque) We were at my house originally (another place I didn't recognize) and I think Katie and Michelle were there.
Anyway, it was, like, 2 hrs or so until the MCR concert we were going to, and for some reason we weren't there already (which turned out to be a good thing), but then apparently the 3 guys in MCR show (they do the weird teleport/appear thing people in dreams do) and they told us that they needed a ride to their show. Obviously, we said yes.
Outside, it was getting dark and it was kind of snowy, and the dream kind of hopped to a point where we had to walk across this 4-way intersection, and for some reason, I walked fast even when the members of MCR were with us, so I was walking up ahead with Katie's dad (apparently chaperoning) while Katie and Michelle chit-chatted with the guys a ways back. There's this really vivid part of the dream I remember about crossing the street in the dark, with practically no cars visible, a blue-whitish glow coming from the streetlights, and a pile of soggy, tiretrack-laden snow on either side of the street, and I climbed up the one on the other side and went down it and did the same when I'd crossed the street.
Eventually, we ended up in Katie's car again (don't bother to ask how) and we were very near the venue. We pulled into this parking lot that was fenced by chain link, with short, red brick buildings on either side.
Up until this point, we'd been talking a lot with the guys and things had gone pretty well, but then I remembered my book and I thought about how awkward things would get if I asked them. But they'd seemed so down to earth that I plucked up the courage to say something about it to them, and as we exited the vehicle, I remember asking Frank (since they didn't really have time to discuss it before the concert, because it was already, like, 5-10 minutes before they were supposed to go on) if I could ask him a kind of awkward question after the show. He seemed a little hesitant at first (can't blame him >.< wink , but he finally said it was fine and I could practically feel my brain stem jump for joy.
After that, I can't remember very much, other than the fact that the venue was tiny ( mrgreen ) The dream didn't last long enough so I didn't get to hear Frank's response to the question I was gonna ask, which I think might be a sign. Oh well. The dream in itself was worth it. The warm, fuzzy, only-MCR-could-ever-make-me-feel-this-great (or God, buy you know what I'm getting at) feeling I had afterwards was so spectacular. Had I been (or were I ever) suicidally depressed, I think the feeling I got from that dream would have had a "Famous Last Words"-effect tenfold.
Currently listening to: "I Never Told You What I Do For A Living" My Chemical Romance
ghostmelody · Sun Mar 25, 2007 @ 03:20pm · 2 Comments |
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Yeah, this is just another boredom journal entry, so... yeah. Lessee if I can think of something interesting to say.
Oh, birthday's coming up in April. Yep.
Hmm... Am. Studies test tomorrow...
other than that...
Oh, and my website's getting moderately decent. There are now 3 short stories, 2/3 of an MCR fanfiction short story, and a full-length terribly boring book-length story posted there, and I've started to work on elaborating the GALLERY and actually getting stuff to put IN IT. The Exhibition Gallery is ready for pictures, but the Conservatory, the Main Gallery, and the Illustrations & Concept Art sections all need to be worked upon. There's a little blurb on the VIRTUE page about the book, which'll hopefully shed a tinsy bit of light on the story plot for a few people until I get the synopsis posted... and the character profiles... and the excerpt. Also, the ABOUT sections as done as it's ever gonna be.
So... that's whats up with me. Any questions?
Currently listening to: "Marches and Maneuvers" Thursday
ghostmelody · Fri Mar 23, 2007 @ 03:55am · 0 Comments |
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Yesh, lessee how the good ol' trilogy is coming:
Currently working on: Descent (book 2 of 3)
Pages: 73 (pages in trilogy: 309)
Chapters: 12 (chapters in trilogy: 54)
Words: Approx. 39,500 (words in trilogy: approx. 158,100)
Writing's been going great. I got a s**tload of ideas, a lot of zeal, and I've even started workin' on an event map! mrgreen mrgreen mrgreen (YAY ST. PATTY'S DAY!) I've got the timeline and the 'Injuries Chart' up-to-date (gotta luv the Injuries Chart blaugh ), I've started stewing more complex and detailed descriptions and concepts for new characters, and I've been planning the entirety of the series from now 'til the end of the third book! See guys? Told you I wasn't dying out. I just needed a little time to rekindle my interests by writing other things.
Currently listening to: "Tie Her Down" Senses Fail
ghostmelody · Sat Mar 17, 2007 @ 05:11pm · 1 Comments |
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Yeah, saw a pretty pimpin' movie today, called 300. If you haven't turned the TV on in the last... oh, say, two months and you don't know what it's about, it's the movie based on the true story of the 300 Spartan warriors that stood against the Persian army for the fate of the city of Sparta.
In terms of sheer bloodshed, 300 could easily be the most violent movie I have ever seen. With one Persian soldier getting speared through approximately every ten seconds and more hand-to-hand sword slaughter than LOTR, the makers of the movie must have spent a good fraction of their budget on fake blood alone to make a flick as gooey as this one.
As for a story plot, the premise of 300 is pretty easy to understand, so much that almost the entire 99.9% male population that watches the movie will be able to understand it. The story's this: the king of Sparta is faced with the option of surrendering his city to the invading Persian empire of King Xerxes or standing up against Xerxes' army of tens of thousands of captured slaves. Under the Spartan warrior code, the city refuses and pledges to wipe out the massive army that stands against them, to defend their city and their families and all that jazz.
My movie rating: 9/10
+ Coolest action scenes I've seen in many years
+ Well developed characters and women in strong female roles
- Way too many men in Speedo-type bottoms
- Easily enough female nudity to fulfill the phrase "sex and violence"
Currently listening to: a water fountain five stories below our balcony window
ghostmelody · Tue Mar 13, 2007 @ 02:40am · 2 Comments |
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Well, chilling in the Kansas City Airport. We're here super early and we've still got 3 hours til our flight ( >.< ), so I'm killing as much time as I can. Hope you guys are having fun, 'cuz it's a little drull here...
Currently listening to: People, hub-bub, and overly passionate public displays of affection stare
ghostmelody · Sat Mar 10, 2007 @ 07:04pm · 2 Comments |
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