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Hand In My Pocket, by Alanis Morissette |
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Weeeeeeeeeell, it's been a long time. I have to say, the reason was mainly my lazyness....that and I didn't have my computer for about a week, so I didn't have my music, so I wouldn't have been able to choose a song that related to how i feel, and, yeah. Heh
Well, right now, I'm feeling really good. Tomorrow (saterday) I'm going to Suessical the Musical, my good friend Derien, and another friend from school, Shalini, are in it. The debate teams going two hours early, gonna have a pinic, and then watch they show. But before that, I'm going to my cousin's birthday party, she's gonna be 18...she's two years older than me, one grade older than me, and about half a foot shorter than me. I find it rather amusing actually...anyway. So, since it's her birthday, my grandparents from Kerville (only about 4 hours away from here) are coming to town. In fact, they're picking me up from school in about 30 minutes. School ends in about 15 minutes. And, on Sunday, after church, I have a job! I'm going to help out at the school pinic thingi, and I get 35 dollars! I'm so happy! Aaaaaaaaaand, of course, it's friday! So this school week is temperarily over! TGIF!!!!!!
oh, and a friend had this in her journal, and I decided to put it in mine......PLEEEEEEEEEEASE FILL IT OUT IN A COMMENT!
1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. Have you ever had a crush on me?
5. Would you kiss me?
6. Give me a nickname and explain and it.
7. Describe me in 1 word.
8. What was your first impression?
9. Do you still think that way about me now?
10. What reminds you of me?
11. If you could give me anything what would it be?
12. How well do you know me?
13. When was the last time you saw me?
14. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
15. Are you going to put this in your journal and see what I say about you?
^_^ Thanksies!
oh yeah, and I know I failed my spanish test I took today, and I found out I just barely passed geography with an 81, but, wala, im still feeling great!
so, thus, the reason for this song, here are the lyrics!
it's kinda pointing out the irony, and, altho, there are reasons why im in good moods, there are reasons why i wouldn't be, but yet, im happy
Lyrics:
"Hand In My Pocket"
I'm broke but I'm happy
I'm poor but I'm kind
I'm short but I'm healthy, yeah
I'm high but I'm grounded
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed
I'm lost but I'm hopeful baby
What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be fine fine fine
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving a high five
I feel drunk but I'm sober
I'm young and I'm underpaid
I'm tired but I'm working, yeah
I care but I'm restless
I'm here but I'm really gone
I'm wrong and I'm sorry baby
What it all comes down to
Is that everything's gonna be quite alright
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is flicking a cigarette
And what it all comes down to
Is that I haven't got it all figured out just yet
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is giving the peace sign
I'm free but I'm focused
I'm green but I'm wise
I'm hard but I'm friendly baby
I'm sad but I'm laughing
I'm brave but I'm chickenshit
I'm sick but I'm pretty baby
And what it all boils down to
Is that no one's really got it figured out just yet
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is playing the piano
And what it all comes down to my friends
Is that everything's just fine fine fine
I've got one hand in my pocket
And the other one is hailing a taxi cab
 shinsetsu moriko · Fri Apr 15, 2005 @ 09:55pm · 4 Comments |
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Spit Me Out (or December), by Collective Soul |
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This song, because right now, well, I'm a tad annoyed...
people wanting to be my friend, even though they say later that I'm to blame for all the sh!t that happens to them.
Alright, know what, ill even tell you who
Her name's Courtney, she goes to my church (yes eric, i'm not happy with her right now at all)
so she and I started this RP because she wanted to...I got to play the guy (of course), and Marcus, to be even more precise (a guy who goes to church who is about 3-4 years older than her that she has a crush on)
I go along with it anyway, cause I usually put others before me
Well, just earlier today, she nagged me about continuing the RP
and I told her that it was uncomfortable playing someone who was interested in females, as i am totally straight
She gets annoyed at first, but then says "fine, forget it!"
and so, im thinking, oh ******** is she so pissed!?
so i make sure that she knows that it's because it makes me uncomfortable
she's still all
w/e, forget it
so im being a bit annoyed here
and then she says out of the blue that shes mad at me for keeping her from marcus one sunday
heres what had happened, she and her friend wanted to ditch, and wanted me to ditch with, so i did, FOR HER...
i had some anime on my laptop which was with me, so we watched two epis of fruits basket (good anime btw)
she seems to enjoy it a lot
but then, she looks at the time, and rushes out to give marcus a hug goodbye
she comes back all pissed at me
and im all WTF?!
she's the one who wanted to ditch in the first place!
i do something for her, and all of a sudden, its my fault if something bad happens!
if she had even the tinyest thing to do with it, and it turns out good, it's because of her
but if something bad happens, and even if its all or mainly because of her
i get the ******** blame!
it pisses me off so much!!!!!
....so i finally yelled at her...and she yelled back...and im pissed...and yeah.....
im not sure we were even friends...
*sigh*
the lyrics:
Why drink the water
from my hand?
Contagious as you think I am
Just tilt my sun towards
your domain.
Your cup runneth over again.
Don't scream about
Don't think aloud
Turn your head now baby
Just spit me out
Don't worry about
Don't speak of doubt
Turn your head now baby
Just spit me out
Why follow me to higher ground?
Lost as you swear I am.
Don't throw away your basic needs,
Ambiance and vanity.
December promise you gave unto me
December whispers of treachery
December clouds are now covering me
December songs no longer I sing
yeah...thats not exactly how the song goes, but thats all the words in it
shinsetsu moriko · Sat Mar 19, 2005 @ 02:31am · 2 Comments |
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Simple Things, by Amy Grant |
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This song because it's upbeat, and cheerful, and about recognizing all those little things that make things so great, like little feelings; and right now, I'm feeling rather upbeat and cheerful.
oh yeah, and its a christian song, so it kinda goes since i went on a christian event thing
This weekend I went on a church retreat, called a Sr. High Gathering.
If you have questions that aren't answered in this journal entry, lemme know.
But anyway, I had a great time at the retreat! I got rid of some of my shyness, and got to the point where I would just shout out "Praise the Lord" really loud, when no one else was. And it felt GREAT!
To add on to that, last night, at the retreat, was a dance. Durring the dance, a fun salsa song came on. I had been dancing with a group of about 5 other girls, when this song came on. They kinda wandered off, and I was about to, when this guy --who's not too bad looking either-- comes up, and holds out his hands, offering a dance.
So we kinda start dancing...except one problem...I've never danced to salsa music with a partner. So I was mis-stepping, so I was trying to concentrate on his feet. I was feeling rather nervous and such, and looked up appoligetically, with a light nervous laugh, telling him sorry that I wasn't doing that great. He simply smiled and shruged. Not too much later, he spun me. Not one of those amazing spins or anything, but it took my attention off his feet. I was still messing up some, but I was no longer fully concentrating on his feet.
Then he smiled at me and said "See, you're doing fine".
I couldn't help but smile back.
Later on, the song ended, and we went our seperate ways.
The next day (earlier today to be more precise), when it's about time to go and all, we start passing each other. He sees, me, smiles, and we say hi and such. Then, smiling, he hugs me. I hug back, and we break the hug (it wasn't long or anything mind you), and then, right as he's walking away, I gather up my courage, and ask him if he has a screen name or something. I "kept my cool", if you will. His face lite up, and he kinda stumbled, somethin like, "Yeah, I mean, no, but. I got an email!"
So he gave me his email, and then, he asked me, really REALLY quickly "canIhaveyours?"
Of course, I gave him mine, we smiled, said our "c ya"s, and went off.
So, this really brightened up my day. First, I feel very brave, and second, this is pretty much the first time a guy around my age flirted with me in real life.
*Smiles* It's GREAT!
Lyrics:
Wake up baby look around
Birds sing, ooooh that sound
Reminds me of a line
From Unchained Melody
Feel like I'm a little girl
Best thing in the whole wide world
Is I can see the makings of a memory
I remember how it used to be
Well I'm still dreaming...
Cuz I dream of simple things
I can believe in
Like the feeling this day brings
True love and the miracle of forgiving
I believe in simple things
Ain't nothing like a sunny day
Chit-chat at a street cafe
Just paint the picture, baby
Where you wanna be
Take a walk, take a ride
So far, you and I
Don't need a plan
But we can share
This revelry
I remember how I used to want it all
Funny now the big things seem so small
I dream of simple things
I can believe in
Like the feeling this day brings
True love and the miracle of forgiving
I believe in simple things
Through all the days
The blues, the greys
A ray of light keeps shining...
shinsetsu moriko · Mon Feb 21, 2005 @ 04:05am · 6 Comments |
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Well...I'm doubting that I have any gift in the love business. Which is rather odd, since a lot of people seem to think otherwise, since they come to me whenever they have relationship problems with their boy friend or girl friend, despite the fact that I've never had a boyfriend, and, as of yesterday, fell for a gay guy. It was rather a shock, and when I thought about it, I was supprised I had not noticed it earlier. At first I was a bit upset about it, as I had thought that we might actually work well together, and are already great friends, ((sorry to the guy if this is making you uncomfortable)) but then, it's actually rather nice to have a gay friend razz . Earlier today we were having fun drooling about nice pictures of hot anime guys. He he he, he has a good taste in guys.
I still kinda wish he was bi or something, but, eh, I guess it just wasn't meant to be sweatdrop
Again, sorry to the guy if this is making you uncomfortable...
After thinking about it, it's actually not all that bad...gay guys are so much fun, and he's a great friend anyway.
So, I choose this song, to describe my whole confussion thing on the whole matter, and give the feel of how desprite for love I feel, and how, like the title, I need to be saved.
Lyrics:
You look like... a perfect fit,
For a girl in need... of a tourniquet.
But can you save me?
Come on and save me...
If you could save me,
From the ranks of the freaks,
Who suspect they could never love anyone.
'Cause I can tell... you know what it's like.
A long farewell... of the hunger strike.
But can you save me?
Come on and save me...
If you could save me,
From the ranks of the freaks,
Who suspect they could never love anyone.
You struck me dumb, Like radium
Like Peter Pan, or Superman,
You have come... to save me.
Come on and save me...
If you could save me,
From the ranks of the freaks,
Who suspect they could never love anyone,
Except the freaks,
Who suspect they could never love anyone,
But the freaks,
Who suspect they could never love anyone.
Come on and save me...
Why don't you save me?
If you could save me,
From the ranks of the freaks,
Who suspect they could never love anyone,
Except the freaks,
Who suspect they could never love anyone,
Except the freaks,
Who could never love anyone.
shinsetsu moriko · Sun Feb 13, 2005 @ 03:14am · 4 Comments |
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Why Does it Always Rain on Me? by Coldplay |
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This one, because that's how I feel.
When things seem to be going great, turned up for the best...something happens...makes me think about it...and realize, that happiness, isn't enough to fully cover the bad, and make me truely happy.
Will I ever be truely happy?
Probably not...not with all this pain I have deep inside.
Heh...yeah...Well, today, after school, I had a meeting with my english teacher and my mom. The main topic was the PPSAT scores (not even PSAT, cause I'm a sophmore), but since he was my english teacher, he had to tell my mom that I had missed a few homework asignments. While this was going on I was nervisly watching my mom out of the corner of my eye, and sure enough, I saw that "Ooooo, she's in biiiiiig trouble, but I'm going to sit here and nod and remain calm and fool everybody and seem like an understanding parent" etc etc....but my teacher only stayed on that topic for like a second, and kinda shurgged it off, saying how it was after I was sick, and that I just needed to work on catching up right after I'm sick and all. And then we went over the test scores. He was extremely happy. The reading comprehension was 55, and the writing was 54, and math was 51. He was going on and on about how I had done so well (when I was thinking I didn't really...), and how I had done better than about 70% of the JUNIORS that had preped for COLLEGE. And see, well, my english teacher could have praised me for getting a D in something, and my mom would be happy. She's the type of parent that likes to show her kid off, and take the credit for her kids success, and of course, whenever I mess up, it's because I'm a teenager going through a "phase". So, she gets the credit for my good deads, and deserts me whenever its bad. But, I was actually kinda happy, cause my grades weren't all that bad, so I wasn't really thinking about how my mom was simply happy because a teacher thought highly of her kid.
He had then gone on about how happy he was that I was understanding the readings so well, and how I discussed and got deeply into the discussions, and that I could get the important bits to highlight out of the books well and such.
This made me even happier, I myself was proud of my abbility to get so into books, but I didn't really think anyone (other than my complaining classmates that claimed I was wasting my time) noticed.
On the car ride home, mom didn't really say anything about the homework, and went on to how happy she was that I did so well. So I soaked it up.
To add onto my list of happiness, tomorrow I don't have school, cause the teachers have to do something (not really sure, but don't really care either...I mean...it's no school!).
But then I get home...talk some online and such...and it hits me like a ton of bricks. All this presure that I have from online, from people miles and miles away, from people in different states! And then...boom...in comes the depression.
It's not as severe or anything, the good news kinda keeps it from that...but I'm reminded of that deep sorrow...way down inside.
But...yeah....that's pretty much my day...and wow.....long post
and about to be even longer wink
here's da lyrics:
I can't sleep tonight
Everybody's saying everything is alright
Still I can't close my eyes
I'm seeing a tunnel at the end of all these lights
Sunny days
Where have you gone?
I get the strangest feeling you belong
Why does it always rain on me?
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?
Why does it always rain on me?
Even when the sun is shining
I can't avoid the lightning
I can't stand myself
I'm being held up by an invisible man
Still life on a shelf when
I got my mind on something else
Sunny days
Oh, Where have you gone?
I get the strangest feeling you belong
Why does it always rain on me?
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?
Why does it always rain on me?
Even when the sun is shining
I can't avoid the lightning
Oh, where did the blue sky go?
And why is it raining so?
It's so cold
I can't sleep tonight
Everybody's saying everything is all right
Still I can't close my eyes
I'm seeing a tunnel at the end of these lights
Sunny days
Oh, Where have you gone?
I get the strangest feeling you belong
Why does it always rain on me?
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?
Why does it always rain on me?
Even when the sun is shining
I can't avoid the lightning
Oh, where did the blue sky go?
And why is it raining so?
It's so cold
Why does it always rain on me?
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?
Why does it always rain on me?
Even when the sun is shining
Why does it always rain on me?
Why does it always rain on....
shinsetsu moriko · Fri Feb 11, 2005 @ 03:17am · 0 Comments |
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this song because it basically talks about the bad things that happen in america, how everything seems to be twisted around, and thats kinda how i feel right now.
its amazing how stupid some people can be, stupid and biased americans, where its supposed to be land of the free and equal and such
*sigh* and the person who thinks this is dirrected to you, well, don't worry, im not really mad at you, it just made me think is all
also, my mom has gone away to her art studio, leaving me alone in a house when its raining.
not that i care, it lets me dance around, sing my heart out, be crazy, and to add onto that....I LOVE THE RAIN! whee
the lyrics:
Only in America
We're slaves to be free
Only in America we kill the unborn
To make ends meet
Only in America
Sexuality is democracy
Only in America we stamp our god
"In God We Trust"
What is right or wrong
I don't know who to believe in
My soul sings a different song
In America
What is right or wrong
I don't know who to believe in
My soul sings a different song
In America, In America, In America
Church bell's ringing
Pass the plate around
The choir is singing
As their leader falls to the ground
Please mister prophet man
Tell me which way to go
I gave my last dollar
Can I still come to your show
What is right or wrong
I don't know who to believe in
My soul sings a different song
In America
What is right or wrong
I don't know who to believe in
My soul sings a different song
In America, In America, In America, In America
I am right and you are wrong
I am right and you are wrong
I am right and you are wrong
No one's right and no one's wrong
In America, In America, In America, In America
What is right or wrong
I don't know who to believe in
My soul sings a different song
In America, In America
What is right or wrong
I don't know who to believe in
My soul sings a different song
In America, In America,
What is right for you and me?
In America
shinsetsu moriko · Wed Feb 09, 2005 @ 03:34am · 4 Comments |
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I think I have a crush on someone
Maybe even a few
Go ahead and leave me a private message
If you think it might be you
... blaugh blaugh blaugh whee
shinsetsu moriko · Mon Jan 24, 2005 @ 09:54pm · 0 Comments |
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