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if you think this is a joke, then ******** you. You dont understand how much my life has changed.


I used to wake up every single morning happy to see the day, and sing. thats right. the second i opened my eyes i sang. I used to be a happy little boy who had (and still has) a great loving family....

I had a girl i loved, and wanted to spend the rest of my life with, although i didnt understand what that would mean, or for that sake what love was.

I sang making up my own words, and it was beautiful apparently. I would sing in the shower, walking outside, in the car with the radio, even around my friends. i did it a whole lot.... I came to face the new day....


it all changed... i dont know how, but i will try to retrace my steps... it really is sad...



Third grade

I had a friend, Raymond Weaver. we were great friends and we did everyhting together, although we didnt exchange phone numbers or anything. i had no friends except him


Fourth grade


they sent me out of 8:1:1 two years earlier, which was a huge step towards a real life.... something happened in fourth grade that send my life into a spiral that would forever changed my life.

Thats when i got the aid... I had one of the worst aids ever. Mrs. Ski Shelkowski? whatever, it doesnt matter. anyways, she was an absolute b***h who I hated a whole lot. They were starting to give me a math class back, when I smacked the grin off of her grimy, old, ugly-a**, ********, face. my life was forever changed.

Fifth grade.

it wasnt over yet, they sent me to a different school, which i had been to before. I was a great student, teachers pet.... (to every teacher in the school) i was every students role model. i made an impression in everybody. i thought i had the best life ever..... i still sang whenever i could.... Garth brooks infact. i was in 12:1:1 because the school didnt have an 8-1-1 program.


Sixth grade, It starts here

it spirals from here. downwards. no friends, still in 8:11 struggling with grades and still with no friends, i re met with old friend Ray Weaver, and Corey Rickerson (who i have known since kindergarden). I was doing good still, but i didnt realize my life was downhill until i looked back. I was transitioning into a regular school, changing from classroom to classroom, leaving at the bell, and what not.

Seventh Grade, the peak

Freedom. half way through the year i was free... free free free!!! I was in all "upstairs" regular-education classes. i had never felt better when i found out. I was picked on every day, all day, and it was horrible.... i didnt know what to do...

Eighth grade, The end.

Quarter one, same old same old, Quarter two.... HELL

i got expelled from school due to medication management. actually, my mom took me out of school and they would not take me back.... but whatever. i was at home on the computer from sun-up to sun-down. no life, no social interaction, nothing. video games almost 24/7....

they wanted to send me to colombus. I said WTF NO! colombus is an alternate education school, where all the rejects that the real schools dont, want send their kids to... my mom said no, and back to home schooling for the rest of the grade.... i was now a shell.... my life was ended.... no more singing, playful, little child we had seen the previous month.... all covered in a blanket.



Colombus....... now


horrible. horrible..... no friends, still.





i






im a shell. what can i do? my life is horrible, no one to talk to... my old self is gone, and the rest of my life does not seem to be changing. im 16 now and have nothing going for me. Can't get a job.... Can't get a permit because my mom says im too impulsive...... anyways, my life is OVER yesterday, i saw a girl i used to know and she gave me a hug. we didnt even really know each other. just a girl i saw in the hall every day and said hi to. she hugged me. i am missed apparently by someone. it put my life into perspective..... i NEED to get into the highschool. the CSE director we have is making HORRIBLE choices and she is RUINING my ******** LIFE!!!!!!!! what can i do? i cant tell her... she is proud of me... i am having many successes right now.... but.... what can i tell her? i hate that woman.