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Reading about someone's past is a good way to past time.
My past (the painful one) The Loveless summer
Today after reading a letter from a friend.My mind was shocked by a loved one who was dead cry .It started when school was over.I was with Aki(my girlfriend's name)going to the mall to meet friends at the food court.After shoping around for are swimwear.Me and the guys talk about summer.When Nishizawa(her brother) surprisely asked"You and Aki going to the beach...?"Surprise at the question.I answer"How did you know about that?!Staring and then smiling at me"So you are taking my sister on a date"Embarassed i looked away wondering what Aki was going to wear at the beach.My mind thinking of past time:the first day i meet her,the day i ask her out.I couldn't wait!Around the night of that day.I was watching the news.Something on t.v. alienate me.''Breaking News''Reports reads that a man named Nrawaka(Killer) riding his car at about 160 per min passing the speed limit.Ran-over a middle schooler.(Right they're i hoped is wasn't anyone i known).Than i heared her name."By the name of Aki Hitomi"When i heared Aki's name on t.v.I was at peril.I just couldn't bear with that."The only one who saw this is this panda name Snoozer founded at the park.If you are the owner of this panda please pick him up around 4572 Tangoro street".Anguish from the news,my love for Aki was dashing me to Nishizawa's kocking on the door.I saw her family in tears.Th same with Nishizawa.Aki's mom hold me in her arms suffering from the report.All i heared was crying.Geting Nishizawa to stand.I sayed with peril in my eyes trying to hold back my tears."Let's go to the park.That's where your sister was found right?"Without being decisive we ran to the park with the elusive news in are minds.Running in to the nightsky we both hoped that it really didn't happen,hoped that the news lied,hoped that Aki was alive.As soon as we could we made it to the park.We started to look for Snoozer.The only thing we known at the time was they reported Snoozer saw it all.So looked around for hours to find him.It was already past midnight tears were blocking my sights untill i stoped,looked around the street and saw what i never wanted to see.Blood geting wash away and someone with a bucket.Before i yelled for Nishizawa i walk to the person washing the blood.Cautionusly i asked''What happen here?''Motionless he answer''Didn't you hear little boy.Some girl got killed tonight.Tey say they're taking her to the hospi''
I didn't stay for long.I'd ran back into park.Yelling for Nishizawa of Snoozer.I found them around the tree where i have found Snoozer the first time.Nishizawa looked at me with a gloomy stare.''Any luck?''.I look at him with darkness in my eyes.Tranquilly i answered''Go home take Snoozer with you.Ok?''Nishizawa did what i have told him.After i saw him on his way i started running.Running to see Aki one last time.Dashing to a near hospital.Running into the doors i yelled out her name''AKI!!!!!!!!AKIIIII!!!!!!!!!''I lost air.The nurse walked up to me.''Can i help you?''Saying with worrys in my words''Aki....Hitomi......take me...to her...please?
As i sat down for a second.''Ok.Right this way''I got up and follow the nurse.As we were walking to Aki's room,my heart was suffering from all of this.When we reached her room,my eye burned with fear.Seeing Aki in the room full of machines and wires i couldn't bear seeing her like that,tears filled my eyes i couldn't hold back.Just then a hand was placed on my head.Looking up i saw the doctor.''It's will be all right son she's getting the best help we got.I'd called them already just let us handle it.Ok?''I left the room without question.closing the door.Tears drop from my eyes i got away from the from the door and sat next to it.Waiting for the news.Time has passed it already morning.Aki's mother was in the waiting room,her farther was outside taking a cirgar.I was still by Aki's door.I couldn't move for a second.Just then one of the doctor makes way for the door.His hands cover in blood.I was about to pass out,but stand up.With a little gloom in my words''Is she ok?''The doctor didn't answer.He went to the waiting room answering to Aki's mother.I didn't need to know the answer.It was shown to me.Her mother's tears answered for me.I look inside Aki's room.My eyes widen,The doctor was right.Aki was died.My mind became gnarled.My heart injured by her death i just standed they,crying.Everone came to the graveyard to see Aki's grave they all had few words to say,i was quiet at the time.After she was put in her resting place.I just sat next to Aki's tomestone.Thinking of the times i spent with her knowing in my heart that she'll never be back.Just then i remember something inportant.Summer was coming around.I should have been happy for summer but my eyes sheded tears like the falling snow of winter.Four years has pasted.Life continued on.Aki's family was better and move on.Nishizawa and i always place flowers on Aki's grave.The last four years of summer was a loveless time for me for all my friend had dates and spent thier summer having fun.I'd went to summer school to keep my mind away from my past about summer.One day i was eating on the roof,the wind pick up and something hit my face.It was a letter.Thier was notthing wirten on it.So i open it.What was inside was airplane tickets to the USA.Then something came to me.Aki wanted to go to USA for are summer four years back.My mind undecisive i ran back home to tell my family the news.They grasped with happyness.I told Aki's family about her dream to go.They wanted to stay.Feeling sad i went to Aki's grave with Snoozer.I placed flowers on her grave and sat by the tomestone.Snoozer did the same.''Snoozer...do me a favor.I want you to take care of the Hitomi's and are home untill i return.You will be no longer my pet but Nishizawa's ok?Go now.Snoozer licked me before he left.I left the cold darkness of my heart to say my words to her.''Aki my love i will be gone for a while.I'm going to the USA just like you wanted us to be.I will return to tell you about my life in the US.So please wait for me.''Just then rain fell on me i looked up.''Are you crying for me...Aki?''I got up and walk away.I looked back the flowers were gone.I smiled and ran for home to pack.One summer later everthing is ok.I tried asking someone on gaia to be my girlfriend,but i got turned down.My heart race to that time of her death.I tried in life but i didn't learn that much english yet.Then someone ask me if i had a love one.That's what made me write about my loveless past.I will try to move on.Intill i find that someone to love.My heart will always remember Aki as my first love.

[Thanks for reading.To the people who read this i have to say something.Never lose anyone close to you.For you may not see they lovely face for long.Thank you.]

I want to thank Pinkrockersrule and Emo_girl03 for giving the friendship and kindness i ones had. crying Thank you friends. crying

Please tell people to read this.It might help and please add your comments about it.I'd like to know what you think about my past.Thank you.






User Comments: [19] [add]
pinkrockersrule
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Mon Jan 22, 2007 @ 04:57am
that really happened? thats soo touching its really amazing how u can take the simplest things and make them sound elegant and better then they really are. you have the gift of words..i am not so talented i just say what i'mthinking...this shows u put alot of thought into it! and i really hope i can hold on to my love..we'll see...its all up to that dredful thing called time...


commentCommented on: Thu Jan 25, 2007 @ 10:06pm
i know how it feels to lose a loved one, i losed my grandpa about 2 years ago and my uncle that i barley new about a year ago. i was mad and asked god why he took them and not me. i cryed for days on in and i still do almost everyday. I miss my grandpa the most because he was always there for me when my dad was,he was and still is more like a father figure to me. there are times when i wish they both were still here, but then i realize they are in a better place. by the way im laurens friend and im deeply sorry for your loss.



Unspoken~Truths
Community Member
inuyashassunshine
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Fri Jan 26, 2007 @ 01:25am
Wow, that was sooo sad! cry cry (I am good friends with Pinkrockersrule) I am so sorry sweetie! T.T I can't even imagine losing someone like that. Especially my boyfriend. I really want to hug him right now...for a long time.. Q.Q that story makes me so sad! i started crying through it!

I really hope you find someone again, My thoughts and prayers are with you heart


commentCommented on: Fri Jan 26, 2007 @ 03:53am
Wow speechless makes me soo........wow sad im srry cry



Ammara15
Community Member
xx kurai_kyuuketsuki
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commentCommented on: Sun Jan 28, 2007 @ 12:29am
wow that is realy sad it is realy hard to lose someone u care about i lost my titda it is lebanesee for grandma i was sad cause she was gone. but i was also happy cause she had a diseese and she was put out of her misery. i cried for about a month. then a year l8ter i lost my great uncle so i lost 2 people i loved. in 2 years and it is all danbury hostpitals fault cause they sent him home when they should of kept him. he had a heart attack when he was going up the stairs to his house


commentCommented on: Sun Jan 28, 2007 @ 12:47am
Wow. This must've been very hard for you to go through.
It's not easy to lose someone you love. Human life is something very important and something that can never be replaced.

You might want to read the novel, Socrates in Love by Kyoichi Katayama. You'd be able to relate to it. (Or maybe you've already heard of it?) I have yet to read it though since it's been sold out.



Yumiko-Kato
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aissjdo
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commentCommented on: Fri Feb 09, 2007 @ 12:33am
omg. how terrible. i wouldn't have been able to find the stength to go on... it takes someone very emotionally strong to do that. cry


commentCommented on: Sat Feb 17, 2007 @ 04:58am
OH!!! that is so sad!!! *hug*



mikailafell
Community Member
x0Flower0x
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Sat Mar 24, 2007 @ 05:55pm
How very sad, I am sorry for your loss, I lost my uncle, and soon to be my father.. sad He has heart problems - But moving on.... Just know that I'll ALWAYS Be there for you. smile Never worrie about not having friends eaither- As you can see, You have MANY Good friends, And family.
*****Hugs tightly*****


commentCommented on: Tue May 15, 2007 @ 02:59am
you have been through alot, my friend. as for i, i have only lost my papa (my dad's dad) when i was reading this, i started to shed a tear in the first few 5 sentences. now my eyes are red and tears are rolling down my face. i know how u feel. crying i have been feeling the same for a few weeks now. and i will be willing to hear anything u have to say and accept (almost) anything you will want me to do, or say. crying crying crying you have a very tender and emotional heart. and i am fond of that.



Caustic Afterbirth
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xXBasketballGirl13Xx
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commentCommented on: Tue Jun 19, 2007 @ 04:17pm
Uhm, hey....
i never knew that much about you .. Just that we were friends and met on gaia
and stuff... But once i read your journal and that one entry...
That must have been so hard on you, and even though years have passed and
i know you must have herd this alot, i truly am sorry.
I can just imagine how it must feel
My friend had something like that happen to her little 10 year old brother just
not even a month ago..... He didnt get hit but he died, trying to climb a shelf
to get some of his clothes he fell and got hung by a belt sad ....
Life is horrible sometimes and feels not fair,...But you will find someone else
and i'm sure aki would want you to be happy.


commentCommented on: Wed Jul 25, 2007 @ 06:27pm
That is to sad. emo crying



Foxy310
Community Member
The Great Beauty
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commentCommented on: Mon Sep 03, 2007 @ 05:09am
i know how it feels to lose someone u love..... i lost my grandpa almost four years ago two months before my baby brother was born,i still remember how upset my grandma was.... then three years after that i lost my five year old cousin two days before he started kindergarden.


commentCommented on: Thu Dec 27, 2007 @ 11:06pm
ummm...now i can't stop cryin KUSO!Matsua! crying cry emo



Disturbed Emo Near-L
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Dolly The Broken Ice
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commentCommented on: Thu Jan 03, 2008 @ 10:03pm
thats really sad i know how you feel i lost my love Lukau in a car crash a year ago


User Comments: [19] [add]
 
 
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