I find I like inflicting small bit of annoyances an pain upon myself.
I always though it was anxiety based an maybe it is but it may also be I feel them so I know Im still alive? It gets hard to explain these thoughts, the picking till blisters the removing of a nail sometimes...
The time I removed a splinter with the tip of my box cutter from work.
I heal slowly an see the skin dry, crack then finally heal unless I pick it open again as my mind does wanna let it go.
Dry skin in my scalp, scratching...
I always though it was anxiety based an maybe it is but it may also be I feel them so I know Im still alive? It gets hard to explain these thoughts, the picking till blisters the removing of a nail sometimes...
The time I removed a splinter with the tip of my box cutter from work.
I heal slowly an see the skin dry, crack then finally heal unless I pick it open again as my mind does wanna let it go.
Dry skin in my scalp, scratching...
Anxiety p.2
Work is another wrinkle...I feel like I have so much to do, too much too do, myself me and I.
As the ones who could help either dont care ( Boss Lady- New Area Lead for my work area. ) or are unable because they have as many health issues as I do. ( My Co-Workers - most are older than me an have health problems as well.)
My Co-Workers do try hard an do thier best to help when they can, but still I absorb a lot of work because I know it will keep them from having to do to much as well as I feel if I dont do qwhat I do somethings just wont get done regardless.
The Boss Lady, is still a little new herself at a position I dont think she was prepared or better yet she didn't fully understand the nature of. Its as much physical as it is desk/ computer work at times. It isnt one an then the other IT'S ALL OF IT AT ONCE.
Im maybe to harsh 🤔 ...it feels like she intentionally does one to get out of doing the other. An leaves stuff she doesnt wanna do to me an my other Co-Workers.
An then she buts in an tries to do all this new s**t to Brown Nose an get in good graces of the other Store Leads/ Managers. Constantly with stupid new stuff no one asked for nor wants. An we have to deal with the consequences. ( Myself & Co-Workers. )
As the ones who could help either dont care ( Boss Lady- New Area Lead for my work area. ) or are unable because they have as many health issues as I do. ( My Co-Workers - most are older than me an have health problems as well.)
My Co-Workers do try hard an do thier best to help when they can, but still I absorb a lot of work because I know it will keep them from having to do to much as well as I feel if I dont do qwhat I do somethings just wont get done regardless.
The Boss Lady, is still a little new herself at a position I dont think she was prepared or better yet she didn't fully understand the nature of. Its as much physical as it is desk/ computer work at times. It isnt one an then the other IT'S ALL OF IT AT ONCE.
Im maybe to harsh 🤔 ...it feels like she intentionally does one to get out of doing the other. An leaves stuff she doesnt wanna do to me an my other Co-Workers.
An then she buts in an tries to do all this new s**t to Brown Nose an get in good graces of the other Store Leads/ Managers. Constantly with stupid new stuff no one asked for nor wants. An we have to deal with the consequences. ( Myself & Co-Workers. )
This is all on top of my own insecurities an self doubt an stuff. cry
