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♠|Rensealler|♠
___i'll be the jack of all trades ' '...{{<3}} you be the master of none______--++
Resident Evil 3 Remake
Short Review

5/10

It’s the DLC game, everybody!

And now for the long review.

Just a warning, spoilers, my friends! Many spoilers. So click away or keep reading, I don’t care, I’m not your mom.

This is perhaps my harshest critique of a game in recent years, but I just have to say… what the ******** was Capcom thinking? Why the ******** was this this the route they went with in the overall scheme of things?

RE3R came out last year, and I was going to drop my review as soon as I could because I beat the game right after it came out. Exactly a year ago. And since then, I’ve played the original, too. And that’s where my opinion began to morph into something a little more negative.

You know how everyone was screaming about Pokémon SwSh being half a game and said that they were too expensive for what little content they had? Where was that crowed for this one? More than anything I think, or rather I believe, Resident Evil fans have been fed to the dogs for so long that they know how good they have it now, and a lot of other franchises, barring Sonic, don’t know how it really feels when your favorite series begin to tank in quality.

This is barely a remake. It really feels like Capcom gave up on this one, they left it with no flourish, there is nothing for players to go back to. This is a SIX HOUR GAME, and that’s a generous estimate. That is ******** it. That’s the entire ******** thing. I played on hard mode without a single death my first time, you know that’s bad! There’s no bells or whistles, there’s no surprises, it’s just the bare bones of a Resident Evil game. For reference, the only game that’s shorter is the original on PlayStation.

This remake left so much to be desired. The few good points it has are minimal compared to what it’s predecessor did, and I played this game for less than a week, and I completed the entire thing, I think I managed completion in around 18 hours or so. It was far less stressful than RE2R and the original, but that’s not a good thing. There were so MANY places to add good scares, or extra content and be terrifying, but they s**t the bed.

Let me talk about the good. The characters redesigns are fantastic as always. Jill is perfect, I like the costume update more than anything, because the tube top and skirt from the original is dumb as ********, like, I get it, but there’s something about female protagonists that get developers all hot and bothered. So much torture porn, like woman aren’t allowed to exist in these worlds unless they get hurt in some extremely sexual and demoralizing way. It’s unsettling how much more abuse female characters tend to go through compared to their male counterparts.

Carlos Oliveira went from a plastered Ken doll to an actual, human man. And he has personality, and they didn’t give him a stupid ******** fake accent. In the original, Carlos is the worst. The forced romance with Jill is painfully cringeworthy, and his character is totally inconsistent! He talks with a Latino accent in the original and mid way through the game, his accent is ******** gone. To this day it blows my mind WHY they did that, when at the beginning of the game Carlos says all the ladies love his accent. Did they, bro?

A lot of the supporting cast is pretty much story fodder, but they got upgrades. There’s Mikhail Viktor, the Platoon leader in charge of Carlos and his buddies, Tyrell Patrick, and Nikolai Zinoviev. They’re all part of the Umbrella Biohazard Countermeasure Service (U.B.C.S.). The biggest improvement is probably Tyrell. In the original, Tyrell was an enemy, maybe above a faceless soldier, but here, he’s basically with Carlos and Jill until the end. I appreciate that, I just wish he survived.

Nicolai is very obviously the mole/bad guy/b*****d. It wasn’t exactly a surprise in the original, he’s just a regular a*****e with a s**t eating grin, so it’s fun to hate him. He follows his original personality pretty closely, but I’m legit bummed that he doesn’t really get his comeuppance. Just like the original, he technically survives. We also don’t get to see the alternate ending where Nemesis kills him, in defense of Jill, which honestly makes me sad because a lot of what made Nemesis interesting is rooted with Nicolai.
Humans are great and all, but let’s focus on the zombies.

In terms of the enemies, there’s not a lot new. The zombie models are the same as the previous games, the only exception is that they’ll have pustules on their heads from being doubly infected by a Tyrant. There are Hunter β, which are enemies that appeared in the original. These guys take up the entirety of the hospital area near the end of the game and honestly aren’t anything really new, just like the Lickers who take up space at the RPD.

Pale Heads, which you may have only seen if you played the DLC for RE2R, they’re almost like the Regenerators from 4, and they’re pretty disgusting. I hate the slapping of their bare feet on the ground when they’re wobbling around.

Drain Deimos are the ******** worst, they take up the worst part of the game, too. They’re parasitic arthropods that try to infect you and crawl through the walls of a power plant. They’ll basically ******** you to impregnate you with parasites. Gross.

And finally, Hunter γ (Gamma) are probably my favorite new enemies just because they have an incredibly fascinating story as to why they ended up in the sewers. They’re short lived and easy to kill, but they offer some surprises. They don’t like fire.

Of course, the star of the show, crème de la crop, the main event is Nemesis. This beast is a T-103 host implanted with a NE-α parasites. So, he’s a super smart Tyrant being controlled by Umbrella Europe through a parasite. The visual redesign and his presence are intimidating, and it’s honestly such a highlight of the game. He’s big, he’s bad, he’s a monstrous terror- and he could have taken some pointers from Mr. X from the last game.

So, it’s pretty obvious the developers took the fan criticism over Mr. X to heart. The way you were chased through Raccoon City Police Department, the random warping, the surprise attacks, the hunting. It was fun! It made the area feel fresh and new every time you heard him stomping around, and it offered so many incredible scares.

An enemy like Mr. X would have complimented gameplay better. Here, Jill has a dodge button, just like in the original. And Nemesis is little more than a nuisance. He’s been nerfed, everything from his original tactics to his choices as an enemy are bare bones. All of the jump scares, and decisions making, and surprise encounters are gone in this. Nemesis is very predictable and doesn’t really extend beyond some basic actions and scripts. He’s great, don’t get me wrong, but when you perfect the dodge mechanic, and when you buy all the infinite ammo, he becomes entirely non-threatening.

When the game was first announced, or at least for the promotional material, they made it seem like the Save Rooms aren’t actually safe. Nemesis can get into any save room regardless. I never experienced that. Even on Inferno Difficulty. Once I entered any building, Nemesis had no interest in me and left. I just feel like Capcom set up a completely different game.

This is what bugs me about RE3R. It had potential, and they just… didn’t ******** do anything with it. In the beginning of the game, Brad Vickers dies helping Jill escape into the downtown. On Inferno, Brad corners Carlos at the RPD, in the weapons locker. You can’t kill him. But it doesn’t matter because once you get passed him, he’s basically gone. But he follows you around the RPD, on the outside.
How much more interesting would it have been if he followed on the inside?
I’m so disappointed they added Brad to the game just to do nothing with him. The RPD itself is an interesting location before Leon and Claire get there but it doesn’t really matter when you’re there as Carlos. Like, I understand that they went to retrieve Dr. Bard. But he was at the Hospital, and that should have been obvious. Carlos at the RPD feels like padding, they added this small section just to re-use the assets and a few more minutes of development for Carlos and Tyrell. While I don’t totally hate it, it probably would have made a lot more sense if Jill went to the RPD, cause, you know. She worked there and all. This would have given a great opportunity for Jill to find Chris’s note in the STARS weapon’s locker, but ******** that who needs story, am I right?

There’s nothing really here that actually held on from the original. There are no branching paths, no surprise Nemesis encounters, and no story puzzles. Everything is strictly on rails after the downtown area. It’s fascinating to me how RE3 went from the most puzzle heavy game to the most action-oriented remake. The locations are there, the downtown, the clocktower, the lab, but all the puzzles were nuked, and it’s just running through boss battle after boss battle.

I like the Resident Evil style puzzles, but the few puzzles we have in the game are all basic s**t, with more than one having the answer on the same screen! It fascinates me how much this game feels like it was something totally different before release. But I think what makes it even worse is they also removed the side stories AND mercenaries! If you didn’t know, RE3 was the game that introduced the Mercenaries style game mode into the franchise, so I was excited to play mercenaries again!

Nope, they removed it, and added a s**t version of a game I only played once, and I forgot the name of it and no I’m not going to Google it that’s a waste of my ******** time.

After that, by the end of the game, there’s nothing that special. From the downtown area, then to the sewers, go see the RPD, then to the hospital and finally to the underground lab. That’s it. There are cool boss fights, don’t get me wrong, I love the Nemesis fight on top of the building, and the final battle when you get to use the best gun in the entire franchise. (The FINGeR, baby!) (It stands for Ferromagnetic Infantry-use Next Generation Railgun.)

I’m also pissed that the special unlockable weapons do not include the FINGeR and then I really did ask my myself what the point? Like, the RAI-DEN is cool and all, but it’s just a dressed-up magnum. If Leon gets the PLR in 4, and Chris can have the Flamethrower in 5, Jill can have the FINGeR!

See, Resident Evil is at its best when it’s completely unhinged, when they don’t give a single damn about coherence. It used to have style, most RE games aren’t batshit crazy from beginning to end. It’s most memorable when it says ******** you, but only at extremely specific times during the games. RE is campy, and stupid, and boulder punching, you know? There’s nothing of substance here. At no point does the game really dress itself up in an interesting way, and it’s over before you know it.

The game plays well, and it does what it’s intended to do, but it feels so empty. Is it my least favourite Resident Evil? God, no, not even close, but while I rate the original above the middle of the list, I’d definitely place this one lower down, just for how little it impressed me. Also, I feel like the developers just don’t care about continuity, between both the remakes, they left out some pretty important plot points from the originals, and it’s not like they’re avoiding some really messed up s**t. They’re literally just removing small details that gave the old timeline most of its robust story. Like, you wouldn’t think so, but there’s a lot of history to RE, and every game has its own unique set of circumstances that influence the main, overarching story.





 
 
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