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I dont know why i feel so bad deep down inside, i feel like whatever i do, whoever i turn to, im just going to end up getting hurt and used up again. All of my friends are changeing, and i dont know if i can change too. Theyre all doing the normal teenage thing and drinking a lot, partying a lot, and to me its like trying to understand a remote african tribe which has been hidden from man for millenia. I dont understand the fascination of drinking, but i think theyre using it as an escape. My friends who are engaged and are good people are making out with other people, im sure one of the people they know is trying to get in my pants, i dont know how to deal with everything. Im worried that my boyfriend will leave me, it used to be that my friends were there for me and my boyfriends didnt care, and now its the opposite way around. This is just me ranting about something thats in the past, but i think of it occasionally and it hurts me deeply, like someone stabbing me over and over... in a emotional sense xp

Love Didiz
xoxo