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did i ever offer the ending
to the Friday thing?
This entry is obviously mostly for me. But I figure, since Exotic bore the brunt of my stupidity with that incident (sorry, love) then it might be nice for her to know what happened. If she wants.
Um, so I was pretty happy with everything for a while, but then she started hearing from her parents that she couldn't possibly be a lesbian and all this, so she and I broke up because I got sick of her saying such things as "I think I want to date boys because I want to be straight so that my reputation doesn't suffer anymore, so we're going to have to break up", especially since this was via AIM. Dude. Wtf. You don't do that kind of thing over AIM. And she never actually broke up with me either, even though she kept saying she was going to, so I just did it myself.
So she wrote me all these love letters for about a week and then got over me, discovered that she indeed was straight, and ended up going out with a guy. I on the other hand have come to terms with the fact that I am indeed a queer as I have been called upon numerous occasions. Now, whenever anyone says it, I just go "so?" xD because now that I realize that it's true, there's no reason to deny it.
I had another girlfriend after her. The nice thing is we were friends before and after so it's not like aggh stressful. We broke up because she was way more into me than I was into her, and I felt bad.
So with dance. I was thinking maybe I should make note of that too.
I don't dance anymore. It tears me apart a little, because dude, I was so close to championship level. I was my dance teacher's second best student in the entire school and she was showcasing me everywhere and stuff. But I seriously injured my knee and ankle, and I've yet to seek help for it. It's stupid of me, I know, especially considering that I'm still playing sports (I've added a couple to my list, too, silly me- I now play field hockey in the fall, I shot put in the winter and play lax in the spring, and kayak in the summer). I would've gone back to dance if it hadn't been so long, and if I didn't pretty much have to relearn everything I used to know. >_< My mom's teaching now, so I don't have the time anyway, because she has to come back from the city and drag me over from sports and I'd never get any homework done, etc etc.
It really hurts. It hurts worse than quitting horseback riding did, because this is the art I spent eight and a half years of my life perfecting. I literally poured my blood, sweat and tears into this and I sort of feel like it was for nothing now. But I have the memories and the 50+ trophies and medals.
Oh, and my gorgeous prizewinner dress. ^_^ I think I'll put up some pics of it. It's not doing anything interesting anyway these days- it's hanging in my parents' closet, lol. So yeah. I know you were interested in seeing it all those long year(s?) ago, so if you still are, a couple pics'll be up here sometime soon.
Aaanyway. I'm pretty much back. And I need gold and a new siggy.
xd






User Comments: [4]
exoticXxXprincess
Community Member





Wed Jul 22, 2009 @ 04:21pm


First off, I am always glad to listen to your problems. I want to help even the smallest bit by listening.
Second, Friday did play a pretty low blow. When blowing someone off, AIM is not the way to go.

I say more power to you, don't let what other people think control you. Over the last year and a half I have decided I'm tired of caring what people think. I've discovered that more people will dislike me since they think I'm crazy (why, I don't know), but the friends I do make (like you <3) are even better than those I would have made trying to please people.

Oh Whigg, I'm so sorry. I know how much you liked dancing, and you spent a lot of time on it. I can't even being to comprehend the sorrow of quitting. I've invested times in my life in chorus and band, but never as long or as hard as you did. I'd say if you miss it as much as you do, try to go back if you want. You can still seek treatment for your knee and ankle. There are some medicines by this one melaleuca company I know work well with injuries. I know a boy who hurt his leg and wasn't suppose to be able to play basketball ever again, but after taking the medicine and doing physical therapy, he's able to go back.

I would terribly love to see your dress. I still have the link to the dress gallery you sent me so I could see what the dresses look like.


Whigg
Community Member





Wed Jul 22, 2009 @ 07:04pm


Yeah, the AIM part pissed me off so bad. She was such a coward.

I kind of make myself sound more "devil may care" than I am, honestly. My mom keeps telling me to grow a pair. She gets really annoyed that I don't just tell the jerks (homophobes, yeah, but there are other people who just find me somehow offensive for reasons I am totally unaware of) who bother me to screw off or something. I do the "ignore 'em and they'll go away" thing, but she says it's not enough. It's not l ike I go home crying over their crap, but it gets to be enough, know what I mean?

I don't think I'd be able to go back at this point. I forgot everything I worked on before leaving and picking it up again would be hellish. Towards the end, my placing at competitions was getting progressively lower until at the last feis I did I walked away without any medals. Mostly because of my knee and ankle. The judges always loved me for my kicks and stuff but it's hard to kick when your knee is killing you.
I'm hesitant about medicine, but I'm thankful as anything for your suggestion of it. The issue of cortozone has come up when I talk to my parents about it and my mom is like dead set against it but my dad will listen to anyone wearing a white coat so I think I'm doomed. All it does is make the pain go away- it doesn't actually heal the injury. And I don't want to go around thinking "yeah, I'm okay" when I'm aggravating my injuries further.

I gotta go take some pics of the dress. It's really pretty. I'm totally not selling it. xP I probably should- I could make money off of it, if it went to another dcancer, but I worked long and hard for it and I am not parting with that beautiful hunk of fabric. xD


exoticXxXprincess
Community Member





Wed Jul 22, 2009 @ 09:46pm


Yes, I do know what you mean. Sometimes all the jabs just really get to me, also.

I can't remember the name of the medicine I'm talking about, but it doesn't just take away the pain, it heals the injury. It's also natural stuff, made from the melaleuca plant. What kind of injury?

If I were you, I'd keep the dress. I see what you mean with going back. You accomplished more than many people I know. The good thing is you're not just sitting around doing nothing, but rather going into other sports.


Whigg
Community Member





Thu Jul 23, 2009 @ 01:07am


the jabs do get annoying, but i don't have enough heart to say anything. most of the ones directed at me are centered around my unbelievable love of latin (xD imma geek, i know) and others are because i actually hold conversations with teachers, and others are because i'm a lesbian. that's sort of to be expected. i don't even know how that got out- i only told my closest friends. i think friday spilled it to like the whole school...

i'll look into the medicine.
the problem is, i'm not even sure what kind of injuries i have. all i know is that i hurt my knee three years ago in dance at a feis- litterally, you could hear it crack when i fell- and i went to an orthopedic and he didn't give me physical therapy or anything, he just sat me out of gym and sent me on my way. so that never properly healed, and it was debated whether or not it was a fracture or a sprain so no one even knew the problem then. so i went three years playing field hockey and later lacrosse with this ankle problem, and it's always been weak since that incident, so one day in field hockey when i decided to play defense instead of goalie, i fell and like twisted up my knee and reinjured my ankle, and so i'm now a total wreck.
that was in really cold weather too, which made it worse.

heh. it would be better for my knee and ankle to just sit around, but not so much for my brain (being that i love sports) or my physique, i guess you'd say (being that i'm in great shape now, but my body is a fickle thing and will magically gain like fifteen pounds if i stop excercizing). and yeah, i've accomplished a lot, and i'm always ready to admit it. it's so cool looking at all my trophies and everything. gives me kind of like a headrush. xD it's not so much pride as recalling how i won each of them. good times.


User Comments: [4]
 
 
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