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B.A.D. Introspection
This will allow me to share with you, those facets of my personality and inner thoughts, which I choose to display.
Malice
twisted
I always get a kick outta watching people suffer. Wether it's just a chuckle from a minor public embarrassment like dropping their keys, or the roaring laughter of watching someone flip through the air after they've been hit by a speeding car. Skiing accidents, bull riders, car crashes, hell, crashes involving vehicles of any kind, they're all ******** hilarious! Even if it was my own body flying through the windshield and bouncing 200 feet down the road, if someone video taped it I'd be laughing in my hospital bed. Things like that go by so fast in real life, you just gotta have the slow motion instant replay to really enjoy it.

A lotta people think that God is some benevolent loving protector who watches over them and has their best interests at heart. What a crock o' s**t! Just look around at the world he's supposedly created, and you'll see how much he loves us. First he started with basic pyrotechnics like any child would. Big bang, asteroids smashing into each other, giant balls of fire. Then after a few million years, get's bored with simple destruction, and wants to start watching things die. So he starts making animals, more to the point he makes predators and prey. Gives predators the teeth and claws they need to make the kill good and violent, and gives prey the natural defences they need to make the fight longer and more interesting. Then over time he makes the animals bigger and bigger, making the fights way more dramatic. Then after a few million years of watching the dinosaurs tear at each other, he get's bored and decides to go for a big planet scorching finish. Which of course is equivalent to a child breaking their toys, which left God with nothing to entertain himself with for a few million years. So with a clean slate, he tries to come up with something new. Something that'll hold his interest for a good long time. Naturally, he came up with us! He strips away all the predatory tools and natural defences that he gave the rest of his creations, and instead gives us intelligence and imagination. Essentially separating us from the rest of the animal kingdom, but at the same time leaving us with all the old predatory and survival instincts. So instead of wasting his valuable time coming up with violent scenarios himself, we do all the work for him. We come up with all kinds of excuses to kill each other, and we keep coming up with new more interesting ways of doing so. We're not just killing to keep our bellies full and stay alive, we kill for territory, money, love, all kinds o' crazy s**t. Although I somehow doubt God is happy about the modern possibility of planet wide nuclear Armageddon, because that means he'd have to start everything over from scratch again.

Think I'm wrong about God? Then consider this:
Even with the recent terrorist attacks all over the world, the war in Iraq with people suffering and dying by the thousands, God still wasn't satisfied. He had to step in himself and kill a few million more with a tidal wave, but at least he waited until after Christmas. And just recently we have hurricane Katrina, merely the latest in a series of hurricanes that hit on an almost annual basis. That's why he wanted us to be fruitful and multiply, he needs an ample supply of cattle for the slaughter.

"Life's a b***h, and then you die... Don't you just love happy endings?"

That's why serial killers keep doin what they do, it makes them feel like God. Having absolute power over the life of another being, deciding their fate on a whim. Don't worry, I'm not speaking from experience. I hardly need to with the myriad of movies with such material that are out there, and they're done well enough to really get you into the moment.

You're probably wondering how this rather twisted facet of my personality came to rise. Well, there was a time when life's miseries pushed me into attempting suicide. But being only 12, I didn't put much thought into it. So after bashing my head against that steel pole several times, I fell on my back and stared up at the sky. Lying there as the other children of the playground gathered around me, I asked myself if there was even one good reason for me to continue living. After a minute or two of staring at the clouds, I thought "Why should I kill myself? The people who drove me to this are the ones who really deserve to die. Killing myself would mean that they've won.". So I stood up, went to the nurses office, and went on with my life.

During the following years in highschool, I learned that bullies usually prefer to prey on those willing to take their abuse. During my first year, a tenth grader who towered over almost everyone else kept following behind me and stepping on my heels whenever our paths crossed in the halls between classes. For months I put up with his abuse, and even when I told him to stop, he just stood there in silence waiting for me to continue walking again. Finally I reached my breaking point, conviniently just outside the sanctuary of my next classroom. I spun around, leaped into the air, and thrust my fist right into his chin. I knocked his head back, and struggled to wipe any trace of fear from my face as his head came back down. He stared at me in total shock, while I looked back with burning rage. Then I calmly went into my classroom, and released the breath of panic and fear I was holding inside. I saw him many times after that day, but he never bothered me again. He didn't even dare to look me in the eyes, and I learned something very valuable that day.

I'm certain this has disturbed and disgusted many, if not all of you.
Now you've seen all three central facets of my personality.
Until next time.

ninja The Loner
mrgreen The Goof
twisted The Sadist





Billy A.D.
Community Member
Billy A.D.
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  • User Comments: [12] [add]
    Nurse_Foreplay
    Community Member
    avatar
    commentCommented on: Sun Oct 30, 2005 @ 12:07pm
    hello nice story really


    commentCommented on: Thu Nov 24, 2005 @ 06:03pm
    *Shock*

    "I can't tell how many people have looked at me weirdly when i've told them about myself, yes I laugh at things that other might find cring...hell I sit and laugh my a** off.Even at my own accidents, althrough it they'll be saying 'OMG..OMG' stare .As in my friends noone really bothers us,heir to much to distance from what the care not to understand, (assholes) so I just walk over to them, talk to them watching them shake in fear twisted "



    Sister Yuki
    Community Member
    DRPhoenix
    Community Member
    avatar
    commentCommented on: Sun Nov 27, 2005 @ 07:18am
    Right on. Hell, you forgot one thing, gods don't ******** with the crazy people. Because they're crazy enough to do what it takes to kill anyone with power very slow and painful. Like jamming a number 2 pencil through their liver, and watching them squirm on the ground till they die of septic shock and lead poisoning. twisted twisted twisted


    commentCommented on: Wed Nov 30, 2005 @ 11:37am
    twisted I think that people hurting themselves and making an a** of themselves is funny too. as for what you said about God, i never thought of it in that light before. Interesting observations! twisted



    Kamerreon
    Community Member
    Ambiently Corky
    Community Member
    avatar
    commentCommented on: Sat Dec 31, 2005 @ 01:48pm
    I dont like people suffering prsonal, maybe its because many people in my life have died, on inparticularly or a car crash. She was like an older sister to me. stare The insulting god thing. I think I'll add that to my favorite post folder. mrgreen Though my first thought of suicide was at the age of 7 from the abuse of my parents, why I servied and didnt kill myself? I have no clue really. I guess I just survive and continue to do so. Discusted no, angered a very little, amused yes more then anything.


    commentCommented on: Sun Jan 22, 2006 @ 12:32pm
    Dude, I like you more everyday. You'd like my buddy Arcticmouse. His sig reads: "I am not insensitive, it's just that I am amused by your distress."



    Darker Shade of Grey
    Community Member
    Spirit_Aid
    Community Member
    avatar
    commentCommented on: Tue Jan 24, 2006 @ 02:21am
    Interesting and real. Pretty brave you are for exposing yourself in such a human light. Most people whom consider themselves fearless would not have dared. twisted


    commentCommented on: Tue Feb 21, 2006 @ 11:58pm
    (billy i actually agre with something u say)
    twisted i torchering people at their own expence twisted
    mrgreen but that just means your crasy mrgreen
    twisted shut up you idiot twisted
    mrgreen why mrgreen
    twisted because you are annoying me twisted
    ninja leave him alone ninja
    twisted keep out of it twisted
    ninja no ninja
    mrgreen ha i win mrgreen
    twisted *shoot them in the head with a ak47* twisted



    Garnia Flogolite
    Community Member
    9 0 n i n a
    Community Member
    avatar
    commentCommented on: Sun Feb 26, 2006 @ 10:31pm
    I'm a sadist too, I agree on most things with you.


    commentCommented on: Wed Mar 15, 2006 @ 07:43pm
    Billy, you are a sadistic b*****d, and that is why I think we will get along just fine... twisted



    Kurigari
    Community Member
    Jiojen
    Community Member
    avatar
    commentCommented on: Tue Apr 04, 2006 @ 04:54am
    Heh you're so right twisted god is just a bored ******** kid with a magnifying glass and were his ******** ants... so lets make this s**t interesting eh? I got a reading one time from a one of those Psycics(sp?*shrugs*) and I asked her out of nowhere "ya think George bush is gonna get assassinated?" and she went about doing my reading after puasing for a moment and she said that It was a posiblity... not sure how true it was but I hope it does happen... I hope i get to see it on TV too, or even better from ten feet away and the blood splater hits me then I can laugh my a** off till I die twisted sometimes I wonder who's gonna do it... maybe a falsely loyal 'dog of the army' who gets an award presented to him by the presisident... wouldn't that be perfect twisted


    commentCommented on: Thu May 18, 2006 @ 03:25pm
    When you've killed as many people as I have you realize there is no god wink



    angel_half82
    Community Member
    User Comments: [12] [add]
     
     
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