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<b>Weeping For Yesterday</b>

<i>How far back should I have to go? Tell me.
Everything is so painfully vivid.</i>

He's gone and left the house, telling her that he is fine and she is better on her own. She didn't stop him, didn't call his name or tug at his arm. He wished she did. Deep inside he was hoping, praying that she would stop him, that she would make everything better again. But she didn't.

<i>The truth is, we couldn't understand each other,
So I left and didn't look back</i>

So he kept on. Steps, stiff and back straight. He turned the corner, leaving everything behiind, his heart, his soul, his reason for living. He thought he could find it again, in another. No. That was a lie. He hoped he could go back and take that girl into his arms and whisper promises that she knew nothing about. Things she couldn't hold him up to, because she wouldn't understand.

<i>Fall into a light sleep, it encompasses my very being
I never carry out my promises
So long ago, I threw away my brightness
And like the light from the morning sun, it can never return.</i>

Now he's trying to sleep, it's hard when she's in his every thought. She seeps into his dreams, drips into his awareness and fades away from existence. She called out to him in his dreams. She stopped him, she tugged at his arm. She made him stay. But then he would wake, bleary-eyed and excited. Only to tumble down, fast, so very fast from that unreal peak. He cried that morning. The sun warming his back as he imagined it to be her arms, wrapping around him. Telling him he could come back.

<i>It lies beside this cold heart, frozen
So completely mindless that it persists forever</i>

He gave up that search. He had to; no one else could replace her. Though, he could never say that he really ever did look. Was it a few days ago that he saw her laughing, smiliing, happy? No, it's been years now. He's become cold and rigid, and hoping that she has suffered the same fate. That she would understand. Has she?

<i>Numbly, I gather the remnants of my emotions,
And searching for redemption, I...</i>

It's hard being bitter, he can't help but look deep inside and find that fading image of her smiling face. He still wants to make it better, even if she's long gone. She's farther away now than she's ever been. He wondered if she died thinking of him, missing him, wishing that he turned around and embraced her. He would never find out, but it hurt seeing her lying there, delicate and frozen.

<i>Fall into a light sleep, on a lonely night
I'm beginning to learn the designs of sorrow
The hiding away of your warm presence
Makes me fear the overflowing darkness.</i>

He's nearly reached his end, hacking, coughing, choking and suffering. It was his heart that hurt the most, not his black lungs or useless legs. He's old and still missing her. Still wishing she were here with him. Somewhere he thinks she'll meet him on the other side, with open arms and that beautiful smile. At that place he can say sorry and she would forgive him and he would give her promises that she will never understand.

He stops. His hand on his aching heart and his face etched with lines of infinite sorrow. He can't do that. Even as the years has stoned his heart and a memory of her smile has softened it now and then, it's been to long. He can't be forgiven, he won't let himself be forgiven.

So he goes, slow and painful. He lies in his bed, weeping for yesterday. When she was his.

<i>Fall into a light sleep, it encompasses my very being
I never carry out my promises
So long ago, I threw away my brightness
And like the light from the morning sun, it can never return.</i>

--------

Half Pain(this is the song from which I got the lyrics from, everyone shout for WHR *__* )

Wow, I have no idea where I pulled that s**t from...