Twilight_Juliet101

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Last Login: 02/01/2009 6:52 am

Gender: Female

Birthday: 03/04

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Q: Why did the blonde stare at frozen orange juice can for 2 hours? A: Because it said 'concentrate'.
Q: How'd this bucket of chicken get in our living room? A: Don't question it just eat it.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde coyote? A: Got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs and was still stuck.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde that was treated at the emergency room for a concussion and severe head wounds? A: She tried to commit suicide by hanging herself with a bungee cord.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who just bought an A.M. radio? A: It took her two weeks to figure out that you could play it at night.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stood in front of a mirror with her eyes closed? A: She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.
Q1: How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer? A: There's whiteout on the screen.
Q2: How can you tell if another blonde's been using the computer? A: There's writing on the whiteout.
Q: How can you tell when a blonde is wearing pantyhose? A: When she farts, her knees bag.
Q: How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves? A: She fell out of the tree.
Q: How did the blonde burn her nose? A: Bobbing for French fries.
Q: How did the blonde die drinking milk? A: The cow fell on her.
Q: How did the blonde die ice-fishing? A: She was run over by the zambonis machine.
Q: How did the blonde get ready for Y2K? A: She changed all her y's to k's.
Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird? A: She threw it off a cliff.
Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you? A: Tell her she's pregnant.
Q: What will she ask you? A: "Is it mine?"
Q: How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? A: Wave to her.
Q: How do you keep a blonde busy all day? A: Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner.
Q: How do you keep a blonde in suspense? A: (I'll tell you tomorrow.)
Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? A: Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes sparkle? A You shine a flashlight in her ear.
Q: How do you drown a blonde? A: Leave a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.
Q: How does a blonde kill a fish? A: She drowns it.
Q: How does a blonde spell farm? A: E-I-E-I-O
Q: How does a blonde "high-5"? A: She smacks herself in the forehead.
Q: How does the blonde car pool work? A: They all meet at work at 7:45.
Q: How many blondes does it take to make a circuit? A: Two: one to stand in the bathtub, and another to pass her the blow dryer!
Q: How many blondes does it take to play Hide and Seek? A: One.
Q: If you drop a blonde and a brunette from 100 ft, which hits the ground first? A: The brunette, because the blonde has to ask directions on the way down.
Q: What did the blonde do when her doctor told her she had sugar in her urine? A: She peed on her corn flakes.
*our 2rd fav.* Q: What did the blonde do when she noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency? A: She turned it over and used the other side.
*our 3rd fav.* Q: What did the blonde get on her IQ test? A: Saliva.
Q: What did the blonde say about blonde jokes? A: She said they were pretty good, but they might offend some Puerto Ricans.
Q: What did the blonde say when she knocked over the priceless Ming vase? A "It's OK Daddy, I'm not hurt."
Q: What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios? A: "Oh look! Donut seeds!"
Q: What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA? A: "Look! They spelled MACY'S wrong!"
Q: What do you call a blonde clutching at thin air? A: A woman collecting her thoughts.
Q: What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? A: Last year's hide and seek champ.
Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head? A: A space invader.
Q: What do you call a really smart blonde? A: A golden retriever.
Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? A: Run like Hell....she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
*OUR fav.* Q: What does "Bones" McCoy say before he performs brain surgery on a blonde? A: "Space. The final frontier......"
Q: What does the postcard from a blonde's vacation say? A: Having a wonderful time. Where am I?
Q: What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde's ear? A: Data transfer.
Q: What is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears? A: Trying to hold on to a thought.
Q: What is the mating call of the blonde? A: "I'm "sooo" drunk!"
Q: What is the mating call of the ugly blonde? A: (Screaming) "I said: I'm drunk!"