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Today, Well, It was a lotmore stressful than I could of imagined.
It was AC Day.[ Anime Club Day ] On Tuesday.
It started out great. Until the end of my first period.
I walked out of the Big high School To meet up with my Friend #1, Only to see her Pulling away and recoiling like Friend #2 had slapped her.
When I approached them, Friend #1 Kinda of.. I guess you can say she fled, and Friend #2 told me to go after her, although I was a bit hesitant at first. But, Eventually I did go after Friend #1 and Clung to her arm like I usually did. She's like a sister to me. Not to mention it was effin cold and she kept me warm. oxo
We walked to math class like we always do. Talking and Chatting like there was nothing in the world. No, Seriously, We were chatting like we had no problems at all, but I knew she was hiding something from me. I confronted her in the notes we always write in class. You know? We draw little anime chibis to go along with the note. Ah~ Good times.~ But After a while, Things started to get messy, And The notes got really... Forward I guess you can say. In third period. Spanish class. Where we had a substitute that let us text, I texted Friend #1 And confronted her again. This time. Things got WAY out of hand. And We fought. We ignored each other the rest of the day, and when AC [Anime Club] Came after school, I texted her, and the way things went, I started to feel like I wasn't even a friend to her any more. She made it sound like I wasn't even worth trying to make up our friendship. It hurt so much. But I think it hurt her too. And The following day, In math, she went with out me to the 9th grade center. And I walked with Friend #2. It felt so hollow and emty. I mean, Friend #2 is one of my best buddys. I couldn't ask for more, But The fact that I lost my other friend, The one I could always lean on and I hoped, One day, she could trust me like I do her, It made me feel really hollow. And She sat the seat away from me in math that day too. I felt like I was alone in the world. When I tried talking to Friend #2 and My other friend, We'll address her as #3, Well, It didn't make me feel much better. My hollowed feelings and my sorrow, It turned to anger and I wanted to lash out at friend #2 for acting so immature. But after a while, I realized I was acting immature too. I even deleted her from my contacts on my phone. I'm not sure what To do, A friend lost, and a "me" I'm hiding from everyone else. What more can I do? Every thing I try, It end up hurting her even more, To the point where I just gave up. She even told me she thought she didn't think I thought of her as a friend. She said that I thought I was only something I had control over. I only kid around, If she ever told me, she didn't want to do it, I would never have forced her, is she just told me "No" I would have done it myself. I want to make up with her but I'm afriad I'll only hurt Friend #1 And #2. No one to talk to. What am I to do?





Saekoi Yui
Community Member
Saekoi Yui
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  • [01/15/10 12:36am]
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