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It sure feels like it. I don't even know if anyone reads this thing, and if they do, I think I feel sorry for them reading about all my personal drama, but this seems to be the only place I can do it. Dunno why. =/

Well, back in January, I tried to OD on aspirin. Don't ask me why, I couldn't give you an answer that would satisfy any normal person. Just that I was in a real funk, and someone in a chatroom I was in wasn't helping, so I started crying, couldn't stop. I just felt like I was nothing, I would never amount to anything in my life and that I'd be better off dead. Only reason I stopped is because someone in another chatroom I was in asked me to. So yeah. I apologize to you now, Pam, for never telling you this. I didn't want to worry you.

Since it's been a while, I'll be doing lots of back-tracking, but advancing to now in each paragraph. At least, I'll try my hardest to.

The house. It's in foreclosure. Really blows. I had originally thought the move-out date would be sometime in January of 2007, but that was false. Then the date was set for February 22nd, 2007, and THAT got changed because my grandma filed for bankruptcy. Then there was the scare for the date to be sometime in March, but there wasn't. Then the scare for the date being in April, and once again, not (because she's filing for bankruptcy, the mortgage company got their claim pushed aside for our eviction). Now it's almost May, and my grandma has a court appointment this coming May for the bankruptcy case, and a hearing on May 3rd about our immediate eviction. My mom is trying to rent an apartment closer to her work, despite the fact that her boyfriend desperately wants her to move to Houston.

Work. I kinda have a job. It's part-time by definintion. I work a few days out of each month for $9.25 an hour. Pretty sweet for some easy stuff. I work at the same place as my mom. Honestly, I think that's the worst idea I've ever heard. No child should have to work with their parents. It's ridiculous. However, my grandma asked my mother to keep an eye out for a job position for her since I was making more than her (even if only part-time). Y'see, during the beginning of the month, they need more employees to work what they call End Of Month (EOM). During EOM, they start printing more mail for the monthly statements for various clients. We process checks there, too, and they're easily washed to counterfeit. There's lots of strict policies in place to prevent this, of course. In relation to the whole "my mom should be moving to Houston instead of living closer to work", they gave her a $1 payraise to stay with them. So she makes a $1 more than I do, and still wants me to help her rent a 1 bedroom apartment because the two of us with paychecks doesn't pay for anything larger. I CALL BULLSHIT, MOTHER. Eh, I really don't give a ********, but she won't let me spend my money the way I want to. She keeps guilting me by saying, "We have to move in a week Myst, or have you forgotten?" or my favorite, "We still have to afford a pet deposit, Myst." Really? I DIDN'T ******** KNOW. MY MISTAKE. I THOUGHT IT WAS MY MONEY TO SPEND HOW I WANT. OH WAIT, THAT ONLY WORKS FOR TEENAGERS WHO AREN'T TRAPPED UNDER THEIR MOTHER'S TYRANNY. ******** drama. She should really start taking her anti-depression meds again.

New topic. Alternate living plans. I could be a dumbass and try to rent my own apartment. I could move to Beaumont (or whatever semi-large city is actually near Houston) and room with a friend. We're both in similar situations, being trapped under our parents. Though, it seems that my mom is trying to help out with this SOMEWHAT.

She's gonna take me to the office where I can get my SSN card, so I can get my state ID, so I can get my bank account in my name, so I'll have control over my ******** money. It is, afterall, MY MONEY. And after this month end, I'm gonna get a full-time job somewhere near the apartment we rent, wherever it ends up being, and buy a ******** DS along with Diamond and Pearl and whatever other video games I want and will probably hardly ever play. I'm just cool like that, I guess. =/

Sunday, which is technically today, but it's never the next day until after I've slept. That's just how I work. Anyway, mom and I are gonna go apartment-hunting in designated locations. (Locations I won't mention due to it being the Internet, and anyone could be reading this, and I don't think I'm very comfortable with anyone knowing exactly where I live unless I know them better.) She'll probably pick one then, and if they're open, she'll sign a lease, and of course, I'll have to sign it since I'm 18 (REMINDER: EDIT PROFILE), and have all kinds of legal responsibilities. amirite? Of course I am.

Saturday. Which is still today. d: So, my mom dragged me to the bank. We cashed my checks into my savings account, and she tried to help me open a checking account for myself. Of course, I already knew my current documentation wouldn't cut it (birth certificate and school ID). They want a State ID, which requires my SSN card, which I can get on Monday (a temporary one until they can mail the real one to me [Oh RNIJ...]) from 9am to 4pm. LUcky bastards are only open 7 hours.

Recently, I've become addicted to Animal Crossing. Since I got my GameCube, PS2 and X-Box back from Houston, I've been playing the Real-Life Sim for about a month straight. Every freakin' day, almost religiously. Especially when I didn't have a phone line, but now I multi-task between the computer and the TV. I've paid off all my debts, I have one of every single fruit in my town, and I'm doing very well. Though, I can't seem to find the ghost at night who'll get rid of my weeds for me. Time-travelling through the game is rough on the terrain, because more weeds grow in that time especially if I don't stagger it.

...yeah. This journal entry is getting rather lengthy, so I'll cut it off here for now. Hopefully another update in a few days when the living situation has been figured out and whatnot. My closer friends (those I keep in contact outside of Gaia) will know more before anyone who reads this thing. Until next time (whenever it should be). Later.