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My life, love, friendships, music, mood, fun things, sad things.... all of the above 🥰
It hurts. I just want peace
okay, now im infuriated with something....I went out with a friend right? that particualr friend, decided they were going to change planns at the last minute (which always happens anywayas but its still infuraiting and hurtfull) and well, Okay, So we were picking up another friend, to go to the mall. Then this friend decided to tell us she needed to be home by 5:30-6:00......wh ich was infuraiting because we didnt get to go to the mall of GA like we had planned. Because we cou ldnt get her back intime. So we went to gwinette place mall instead....which was okay but frustraiting cause i had like no time t o figure out what i was buying for who...because well they were all with me, and yeah....the o ther people i plan oin going shopping with them sometime too.... sad So i got stuck looking for presents for 3 people, and keeping an eye out for stuff for them...but yeah... So! thats not why im upset though....
Why im upset is the change of planns, I thought we were going to go back to karens house after and hang out for awhile...but apparently karen had made planns with maria to study after telling me something different, I ended up haveing to go home because peopel decided to do school work instead of hanging out with me, and karen doesnt even have to do freaking schoolwork, She's helping other people which is fine but she doesnt have to spring it on me randomly after she makes planns with me too...>.< i dont understand...Not only that but After we got out to her house, me thinking i was getting out of my car with them. I get out part way, Karen and maria decide to get out of the car and not say bye or thanks for the ride or show any form of appreciation for driving them around today, the only one who did was gwen...>.< I was very infuriated by this.... because i felt as though i was being taken advantage of.... sad it made me sad.....I dont know how to handle it, Because i dont want to cause drama, so the best thing i could think of would be to post about it on my gaia journal.
I hate it when i get ditched like that....I dont do that to them anymore ( I admit, i used to be kinda bad about it when i was first dateing caleb...) But I dont do that anymore, I think they should treat me the same way...Atleast gwen was respectfull and made me feel as though she cared...the others were just kinda rude...an explanation of whats going on and a goodbye would be nice...especially sence i went out of my way to pick someone up whent out of my way to quit christmas shopping when i was not done, went out of my way to go to a totally di fferent mall that im not used to....>.< yeah, i was upset. I hope that this wont happen again. And I hope that if these people are reading this journal entery that they dont get upset with me. Because well, I dont want to cause drama by talkingabout it in person. so im hopeing that by posting it here will get the point across and not much will need to be said....
yeah besides that!
There are happy things going on now too ^^ its christmas XD the celebration of christs birthday and such is exciting. Me and caleb worked out some issues, we havent fought much at all this month...that i can remember ^^ which is good, i dont even think we fought much the month before last either or the month before that, but i couldbe wrong. my memory is forgetfull ^^;;; We realized what the issue was sortof, and talked about it..IM trying to work some things out with him. I think its getting somewhere smile unlike before.....Now theres some more communication, he's got a better job now...well working two jobs at once, and he's going to school...i hope he'll be ab le to continue going to school next quarter, to those who are christian on here who are reading this journal i would greatly appreciate pra yers about that ^^ Im praying a bout it as well...even though its not for myself smile i care about him being successfull too....yeah, Sho thats whats going on with me and caleb....Im still upset with his parents. they are sweet parents but i hate how they handle things. I hate lots of things that they have done...and are still doing.....*shrug* i donno* anyways, if peolpe have advice about the friend thing or comments please leave them, i love comments ^^ they make me feel special smile

Mood:......sleepy/kinda upset/i donno lol
Music:none at the moment.

User Comments: [1]
Community Member

Fri Oct 02, 2020 @ 07:25am

First. I forgive my friends.

Second I'll forgive caleb in my heart. But never in my actions. He has lost my trust. He lied. He said he was going to school to manipulate me and win me back. But he NEVER went back to college.....Nor did he have a plan for what to do if he didn't get an education..... He knew that lack of ambition is a deal breaker for me its a big reason for why we broke up and why I have ended my relationships with a lot of people..... I dated in the past. And He made up lies. He came to me a few weeks after this point. And told me. So allllll of those posts about how I was mad because caleb was in "finals......" Caleb was not in finals. He was playing video games and doing god knows what else. At this point I don't even know if he cheated or not.... And at this point its been over 12 years and I'm married. I don't care. However I still have a hard time with how bad he hurt me..... He is not a good person.... Or he is trying to be but fails... Anyways. I'm so glad I didn't marry him.

User Comments: [1]
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