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Abandon Thoughts for a Happy Ending |
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When my life ends, I know that there will be no place for me to go.
I'll wander around the earth, until my soul withers away, oh so slow.
I'm not good enough for Heaven, nor am I for Hell.
For I have not played my cards too well.
I am the spawn of sin; no God wants me.
I cut till I bleed, just so I can see
If this God we all love and know is really out there.
He let's me do this, does He really care?
I do right by Him, at times. I wish for Him to be so proud.
I call out for Him, scream oh so loud.
No response, why does he not hear me?
Is it because I must close my eyes to see...
The beauty and truth that makes him real
And have that warmth of his love be mine to feel?
Am I just to weak and deaf myself to hear him reply?
I guess I should just stop now, why bother to try.
I hold myself, as I lay on the ground, crying and screaming to the skies.
I assume that God is deaf to me, and my startling cries.
Now I ask, where is this "Satan", this creature from underneath?
Is he non-existant upon this heath?
Shall I talk of him too, as if he is also unreal?
Must I cut again, just to feel...
His hands, as they burn, while slowly wrapping around my wrist?
Hurting me oh so coldly, as if he were an icy mist,
Forcing it's way through, chilling my heart.
Covering me, and slowly tearing this damaged soul part.
I shake myself from these illusions and taunting mental depictions.
Realizing that there is no escape from these convictions, I scream:
THERE IS NO HOPE FOR THIS HATE-FILLED SOUL.
NOW, I GIVE THIS BODY TO WHOEVER WANTS TO BE IN CONTROL!
I am no longer in search of solitude, or peace of mind.
Now, a hole for this body is what I hope to find.
Oh God or Satan, you have watched as I have continuously fought,
But, now it is time for me, to abandon every thought:
Of A Happy Ending, becuase I know damn well, that there won't be one for me.
No reason for false happyness, or sheepish glee.
I'll watch it all end, take that last gasp of air.
When I die, I will find out if either of you are really there.
Await me, with open arms and eternal bliss.
Oh how I wait, for Death's sweet kiss. Oh how I wait...
 emo_butterfly928 · Thu Jun 26, 2008 @ 03:26am · 1 Comments |
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