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Mr. Edwards Letters for March 2008 |
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Drillbit Taylor
Monday, March 31, 2008
Good day, Sequoyah Cougars!
On the Friday of spring break, my wife and I went to Tinsel Town Theaters to see a just released movie. It starred one of my favorite straight man comedians, Owen Wilson. I am guessing that several of you have seen the movie since it has now been out for two weeks. The gist of the story is that a couple of freshman students entering high school for the first time become targets of the school bully. He makes their first few days miserable. In their effort to try to thwart his behavior and to be left alone they end up hiring Drillbit played by Owen Wilson to protect them. They thought he was a retired Special Operations Soldier, but in reality he was just a bum living in the shrubs along a busy freeway.
The movie had several moments of humor, some appropriate and some probably not. I believe the actors that were portraying the obnoxious lives of bullies had it down right and that most people watching the movie could see real people in their past that were bullies. I am sure the film triggered thoughts of the jerks that they have had to deal with in life. I could definitely see negative “bully” behaviors that were similar to the immature people in my high school and yet, that was 35 years ago. In my letter last week I shared that any school could become bully free. All it required was for passive witnesses to choose to be active and refuse to allow the bully’s behavior to exist. We don’t have to permit bullying to occur. The majority of the students in the film didn’t want it to happen and I know that the majority of the students in this school don’t want bullies around.
At the end of the film, when the bully was arrested and led away by the police, everyone was pleased he was gone. Even his so called best friend was happy about his departure. No one was going to miss the bully’s behavior. As I said they were pleased that he was gone.
Listen to this rather long quote from Paul Langan about the opposite of the bully.
“Each day tens of thousands of bullies move through schools hurting and wounding their peers. An anti-bully is a person who, instead of practicing cruelty each day, practices kindness. He or she looks for the shy, isolated students in school and makes sure they are treated fairly. When a bully starts mistreating someone, an anti-bully will step in, either by verbally discouraging the bully or by standing with the target so he or she is not alone.”
I challenge you to be an anti-bully. Let’s make every attempt to make our school a bully free zone. Be a Drillbit and protect our school.
With something I would like you to consider and reflect upon, make yours an exceptional life—or not. The greatest power that a person possesses is the power to choose. Please choose wisely.
Keep Your Uniqueness
Friday, March 28, 2008
Good day, Sequoyah Unique Ones!
I don’t call you unique ones lightly. There are 991 different middle school students in this building. You come in all sizes and shapes and colors. You have common names and you have uncommon names. Some of you look similar and some of you look like your parents do. We even have several sets of twins in the building, but even they have some differences more than just names. Everyone has different attitudes and mind sets. And although most of us share the same value system, there are even differences there.
Do you remember me saying in the past how important it is to keep our uniqueness? That is absolutely true as long as our differences aren’t wacko. In other words, no one is permitted to walk the hallways naked. We can’t carry illegal substances. No one is allowed to physically abuse others. Almost 100% of us follow the rules of the building and the school district. So we do have some conformity, but we can do that because we are social creatures. That kind of conformity doesn’t release us from our right to be unique. Could our school decide that everyone has to wear the same clothes, the same uniform? Absolutely. But it probably will never happen because we all appreciate the right to be a little different and most of us respect the uniqueness of each other. Listen to this paraphrased quote that is almost 2,000 years old.
“Don’t let the world around you squeeze you into its own mold.”
It means that you are not required to be exactly like someone else. It means that although we have expectations for all students because we do live in a society, all students don’t have to give up their individual characteristics. It means that teachers can be different. It means parents can raise their children the way they deem best. It means that every time your school picture is taken, you can expect to be you.
I encourage you to keep your uniqueness. Make sure you follow the norms of society to remain free from trouble, but at the same time keep your uniqueness. There is balance there, find it.
With something I would like you to consider and reflect upon, make yours an exceptional life—or not. The greatest power that a person possesses is the power to choose. Please choose wisely.
Attitude Is More Important
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Good day, Sequoyah Positive Ones!
Do you have many memories from when you were five years old? Even though it was just seven to nine years ago for most of the students, I wonder if you remember any more than I do about when I was five. You have got to know that it was 47 years ago for me, but I do remember some things because I try to do so.
I remember that I thought I could do just about anything that I wanted to do. One time my father was driving a bulldozer and gave me the opportunity to stand and ride between his legs and operate the controls. As a five year old, I couldn’t drive that dozer, but I sure thought that I could.
I remember walking behind a lawnmower thinking that I was pushing it and cutting the grass. The reality was that my father was behind me and he was actually pushing the mower. I distinctly remember turning and looking up at him while doing it. He told me to pay attention to what I was doing. As a five year old, I couldn’t run the lawnmower and cut the yard, but I sure thought that I could.
I remember racing some older kids across a friend’s backyard from fence line to fence line. I believed that I could outrun those bigger kids every time we raced, even after losing ten times, I thought that I could outrun them the next time. As a five year old, I wasn’t faster than those older and bigger kids, but I sure thought that I was.
I remember sitting with my mother and grandmother as they were building a puzzle at my grandmother’s apartment. I picked up pieces of the 1000 piece puzzle and pretended to help. A five year old won’t find many pieces that fit unless they have a grandmother like mine was. She would find pieces that fit and instead of placing them in the correct spot, she planted them into my hand and helped me put them in the right place. As a five year old, I couldn’t build the puzzle, but I sure thought that I could.
I also remember reading a 500-page book to my mother while she was ironing shirts for my father. It was her book that she had checked out from the library. I told her a great story, but I wasn’t reading the words. As a five year old, I couldn’t read an adult novel, but I sure thought that I could.
All of these memories were propelled by one common, characteristic of a five year old. That characteristic was a positive, hopeful attitude. Religious leader and writer, Charles Swindoll, says this about how important one’s attitude is.
“Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.”
My attitude is what it was as a five year old that made me think that I could drive a bulldozer, mow a lawn, outrun other older kids, build a puzzle, or read a novel. Attitude is not just more important; it is the most important thing when it comes to effort.
With something I would like you to consider and reflect upon, make yours an exceptional life—or not. The greatest power that a person possesses is the power to choose. Please choose wisely.
A Bully Free Zone
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Good day, Sequoyah Great Ones!
A couple of weeks ago, Mrs. Silvey and I went to a workshop in Norman that was focused on dealing with “Mean Girls.” It was interesting how much girls are negatively influenced by girls that are bullies. Most of the bullying was never physical, although it could be once in awhile. It was also interesting how many girls went along with the bully or “Queen Bee” in order to avoid being one of her victim’s. We looked at what traits a bully has in common with all bullies. The characteristics were similar for both boys and girls. We learned that bullies exist because they are people that have failed to develop their ability to have successful relationships like everyone else. They are still operating in their personal relationships like they did about half way through elementary school.
The process to remove bullies is really pretty simple, but it takes unity. All of the dozens of bystanders that see bullying everyday will just need to become active witnesses. When information is reported over time repeatedly, especially from different witness after different witness, a case against the bully is built to the point that the evidence is overwhelming. At that point, the bully is removed from the youth group, or dismissed from the athletic team, or suspended from the school. Here’s a hard example. If I bullied the teachers in this building, or I bullied the parents of the students, I would be removed from my job if there were enough active witnesses stepping forward. The wealth of witnesses reporting what they saw would be enough for my removal.
So when I tell students that bullying has to have a perceived imbalance of power in the bully’s favor, it can be corrected with the power or advantage being taken away by the group. The active witnesses can work as a group to place the scales back in proper balance. Listen to what philosopher Noah Ben Shea shares with us in wise words.
"The defining measure of the term “civilization” is how people with power treat people without power."
So do we leave the power with bullies or do we share the power among the active witnesses? When we look at people with an imbalance of power are they using the advantage to help others or are they using it to harm others? Is someone powerful offering the possibility of more help or is the person threatening more aggression? The mature powerful people are benefactors of others and the immature people of power are simple-minded bullies looking to be self-centered, selfish people. Let’s improve our civilization. I am so thankful that there are more mature people of power than there are powerful immature individuals. I challenge all of us to become active witnesses. Being a bystander provides the negative imbalance of power to exist. Being an active witness corrects the imbalance. Being an active witness improves our Sequoyah civilization.
With something I would like you to consider and reflect upon, make yours an exceptional life—or not. The greatest power that a person possesses is the power to choose. Please choose wisely.
Enjoy Life Everyday
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Good day, Sequoyah Wise Ones!
One day I was working on several problems at one time. As I went into one office to place a note on the desk, there was a teacher using the telephone in there. He was on hold so as I rushed in and started to hurry out, he saw me looking a little frazzled and asked, “You having a bad day?” My response was quick and without thought and without waiting to see if he heard me. I said, “No, I’m having a bad life.” I could hear him laughing a little as I walked away. I’m sure he was laughing because he knew me well enough to know that I meant that I was having a bad moment or that my mood stunk or that I was troubled with something. He knew that I really do love my life, good and bad.
As humans, we have a plethora of emotions to choose and experience everyday. We can be happy one moment and then angry the next. A person can make a comment that triggers us to choose to be depressed or a compliment can be spoken that lifts our spirits. No other living creatures get to experience so many emotions like we do. So many people believe that our emotional experiences depend on how much money will make us happy or how much time will give us contentment or how many friends will make us feel connected or how strong we are or how healthy we are or how powerful we are. But listen to this! How much we have of any one thing does not govern how successful our life is or will be. Listen to these examples. At times, I believe that more books, and more time to read them, will make me feel more successful in life. Also, I once asked a friend if he collected friends because he always seemed to work hard to have more friends than anyone else. How much we have of any one thing does not decide our success.
Our decision on how much we choose to enjoy life is what counts. Listen to this quote from a wise author and orator named Charles Spurgeon.
"It is not how much we have, but how much we enjoy."
The bottom line he proposes is that how much we choose to enjoy our life is what matters most, not what our life holds in the form of possessions, whether tangible or intangible.
There use to be a popular poster in the 1980’s that had a man with three high dollar cars beside him standing in front of a multi-million dollar home, with a boat and motorcycles and jewelry, stacks of money and all the riches you could think surrounding him. The poster said, “He who dies with the most toys—wins!” A short while after that poster was released, another followed that was similar, but had a universal truth. It said, “He who dies with the most toys—still dies!”
So I remind you that it is not how much any of us have that matters, it is how much we enjoy life that counts.
With something I would like you to consider and reflect upon, make yours an exceptional life—or not. The greatest power that a person possesses is the power to choose. Please choose wisely.
Where Do You Fit?
Monday, March 24, 2008
Good day, Sequoyah Cougars!
Listen to this rather long quote by Benjamin Barber. For those of you keeping record of the quotes you only need to write down the underlined portion.
"I divide the world into learners and non-learners. There are people who learn, who are open to what happens around them, who listen, who hear the lessons. When they do something stupid, they don’t do it again. And when they do something that works a little bit, they do it even better and harder the next time. The question to ask is not whether you are a success or a failure, but whether you are a learner or non-learner."
So where do you fit in the world? Are you a learner or non-learner? As for me, I am a learner and always will be. Most of you are learners and have been from the get-go. I go into classrooms and observe students everyday of the school year. It always amazes me which students use their time the best and which don’t. Most students learn more in the three years in middle school now than some of my friends did in 5 or 6 years of education when I was a kid. We are becoming a better learning society and the only people that are being left out are the ones that choose to be left out.
If you are a learner, it is because you have chosen to be one. If you are a non-learner, it is also because of your choice. So again I ask you, where do you fit? In ten years will you be glad that you are a learner or will you wish that you had chosen to be one? Where do you fit?
I have a friend in California that I went to high school with in the early 1970’s. He chose to be a non-learner and struggled with his grades and he barely passed enough course work to graduate high school the year after all of his friends and I did. It only got worse for him with his lousy decisions. He ended up frying a few of his brain cells with dangerous narcotics and an overuse of alcohol. He has a real tough time just holding down a minimum wage job now. The last time we talked, he told me how he wished he had done a couple of things different in his past. Then he proceeded to sit and tell me a couple of hundred things that he wished he had chosen to do differently. He told me he didn’t fit with everyone else his age. Looking at David, I wished he had made different choices also. I cannot stress enough to all of you to measure your choices. Think about them. Evaluate the consequences carefully. I encourage you to choose wisely. I always will. I implore you to choose wisely.
With something I would like you to consider and reflect upon, make yours an exceptional life—or not. The greatest power that a person possesses is the power to choose. Please choose wisely.
-Melodic Time- · Mon Jun 16, 2008 @ 04:48am · 0 Comments |
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