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 Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 3:15 pm
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You know you've played too much Zelda when...
•You only wear green clothes
•When your parents ask you to take a bath you say yeah sure I just gotta find the Triforce first
•All you drink is milk and you don't eat
•You see a fat guy outside then run outside and say can I have your autograph Darunia?
•You chase chickens around for fun
•You always wear a long hat and NEVER take it off
•You go into a ranch jump on a horse and say I finally got Epona without having to beat you in a race Ingo!
•You carry milk in a bottle all day and don't drink after it's been out in the sun.
•You don't wash your bottles after you've put bugs in them.
•You think carrying a sword around is fine since nobody stops Link if he has a sword.
•You sleep with all your clothes and shoes on.
•You sleep only once and then run around all day and all night.
•You swim with your clothes on.
•You wonder why your clothes are wet after you swim; Link's aren't.
•You wonder why your school doesn't offer Hylian as a foreign language.
•You wonder why people yell at you when you barge into their houses without knocking; Link does that all the time.
•You wonder why people yell at you for breaking their pots.
•You wonder why people yell at you for taking rupees (jewels) that you find around their houses.
•You roll into trees hoping that bombs with fall out.
•You cut down bushes.
•You wonder why people yell at you when you cut down their bushes.
•You think you can play the ocarina even though you've never even touched one.
•You play warp songs and are disappointed that you don't warp.
•You go to a temple and look for the door of time.
•You drink a green liquid and think that when you spin with a sword in your hand that fire will shoot out.
•You scrape your knee and chop down bushes looking for little hearts.
•You think a firefly is a fairy.
•The only thing you ever drink is milk.
•You pay some guy 200 dollars for a bottle of milk, drink it, and think that you have unlimited magic.
•You go to museums and look everywhere for a scroll telling about the triforce.
•You wonder why they don't teach about Link but teach about saps like Napoleon, who almost controlled the world but didn't save it from magic (like Link did).
•You think that a bag the size of your fist can hold 40 bombs, each the size of your head.
•You slash at chickens and get yelled at for killing the chickens
•You pick up a chicken and jump off a roof thinking you can fly (and breaking your leg)
•You cut down bushes and go inside a house and think that when you come out the bushes will be there
•You yell and whimper but you never talk
•You plant a bean seed and think that after seven years it will become a flying plant
•You catch a bug and release it and is disappointed that it doesn't turn into three bugs
•Everytime you get something new you turn around and hold it up in the air
•Your mom and dad are worried 'cause your room is full of bottles with hearts in them.
•You are at or have a Zelda fan site.
•You sneak into someone's chimney and hope to find a secret room.
•You swing your sword around carelessly because you think that your sword won't hurt anyone; no one gets hurt when Link does it.
•You play your ocarina and wonder why you don't go back in time.
•You cut a sign down and think if you play a certain song it will come back together; Link does it all the time.
•You annoy chickens and think that a lot of them are going to kill you so you run away.
•You jump off of a high place and think that you are only going to get hurt a little; Link never gets hurt that much.
•You go on a quest looking for the Temple of Time.
•You go into a graveyard and move some tombstones hoping to find some Poes.
•You try rolling into a box hoping to break it open.
•You dream about Zelda and the game.
•You think you can slash people and not hurt them. Link does it all the time.
•You never want to sit down. “Link never does so why should I?” you think to yourself.
•When you want to sneak past someone, instead of tiptoeing, you run and get caught. You don’t understand why because Link even shouts when he does it.
•You get a random stick and don’t get why when a butterfly lands on it, it doesn’t turn into a pink faerie. You did it hundreds of times in the game.
•You think that if you wear a blue tunic, you can stay underwater for as long as you want. So you try it out and you start choking under the water.
•When you go fishing you think all the big fish will be around a fell tree in the water, but they’re not.
•You sing Epona’s song and expect her to come running from nowhere. Link did it regularly.
•You think you can never bleed because you never saw Link bleed.
•You think a regular metal shield can stand up to big huge falling boulders. Link did it on Death Mountain.
•You think that inside windmills there will be a weird guy playing the song of storms and you want to learn the song so you can drain the well to find the dungeon.
•You wear weird masks at night while you run around fields so that the Stalchilds don’t get you. No Stalchilds come up so you presume it worked just like it did for Link.
•You go into hot death craters wearing a red tunic and think you won’t get too hot. But you do get hot and you don’t understand.
•You think that if you kill spiders then a little medallion will appear and you get to keep it. But it never happens.
•You look for pieces of heart day in and day out.
•When you go to the local shop you are a bit surprised to see they don’t use rupees as the local currency.
•You are baffled because there are no wild dogs freely roaming around your central marketplace. There was when you saw Link in a central marketplace at night.
•You place bombs next to trees and you don’t understand why the tree blew up instead of a hole appearing in the ground.
•You think that when you put bugs in soft soil, a spider will pop out.
•You are constantly asking people questions about where to go next to find the Triforce. But instead you get a slap.
•You think you can catch a ride on a certain owl called Kaebora Gaebora.
•Everywhere you go you expect there to be theme music like there is in Hyrule field and Kakariko village etc.
•You think you can carry LOADS of stuff like Link does. But you just cant seem to manage.
•When you break jars, boxes and stuff like that, 1, you get shouted at for breaking them, and 2, you are asked to clean up the broken clay and wood. You wonder how broken bits could be left around. There never is for Link.
•You refuse to go to school because Link didn’t go to school.
•You get really scared when 2:30am comes on the 1st day of any month at a farm because you think the aliens will come and try to get the cows.
•When someone mentions Gannondorf you almost have a heart attack.
•You wonder why people yell at you for trying to walk through them. They never shouted at Link.
•You wonder where everyone is like Malon, Zelda, Ruto, Saria and everyone else.
•When you fall of a high platform you try to roll to prevent yourself from getting hurt but instead you almost crack your head open and end up in hospital.
•You don’t get why you get tired after running across a field for almost a whole day. Link never complained or got tired.
•You think you can find things at the bottom of lakes.
•You insist that you keep the cow in your house that your mum wants out. You say that it can produce you milk.
•You wonder why cows don’t talk to you when you play Epona’s song. You did it in the game.
People laugh at you when you say that you believe Gannondorf has the Triforce and you don’t get it.
•You never brush your hair, you never change your clothes, you never say anything, you never sleep and you never have a shower.
•When people see your ocarina and say it’s cool you say to them that it’s the Ocarina of Time, and they laugh.
•You wonder why when you look at the sun it hurts your eyes. Link never complained.
•You never leave the house without an empty bottle.
•People stare at you when you put on a mask, stagger for a while, and scream in agony, trying to turn into whatever the mask is supposed to look like.
•You're scared to walk through the corn maze at your local farm because you expect to be ambushed by a Moblin, just like Link in the Sacred Forest Meadow.
•You have tried several times to find someone who will fund a submarine expedition to the remains of Old Hyrule.
•Whenever you receive a gift, you hold it above your head for all to see.
•You expect the mailbox to wiggle when there is a letter for you.
•You believe the best way to get a horse to move faster is to slap it with a carrot (at least that's what Link does to Epona...)
•People laugh at you for wearing socks on your head.
•Your heart skips a beat when you see a prank disembodied human hand (you expect it to grab you and yank you out of the building).
•When you go on a hike in the woods you think music will play and a Skullkid will jump out.
•You start living in a forest
•You never sleep
•You play a warp song and you wish you were gone
•You never wash
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Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 3:15 pm
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Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 10:45 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 12:34 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 1:13 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 6:50 pm
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Posted: Sun Dec 17, 2006 6:09 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 11:56 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 23, 2006 9:38 am
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Posted: Sat Dec 30, 2006 4:53 am
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Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 8:00 pm
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 8:44 pm
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Posted: Fri Feb 09, 2007 3:03 pm
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Posted: Fri Feb 09, 2007 3:06 pm
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Posted: Sat Feb 10, 2007 10:57 am
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