HELP! HOW DO YOU DO A MEDIEVAL WEDDING/HANDFASTING?

[ShadowDruid]

Hi, my fiance and I plan on getting handfasted next June, and I want
it to be as Medieval as possible, BUT, 1) some amounts of money and
2) not real sure how to go about doing things, any ideas?Thank you!!  

[north_of_nita]

Oh my uncle had a handfasting wedding. its kinda easy to set up, Ill have a look around and talk to him if you want.  

[Llelwyn]

From what I've read, modern handfastings aren't really very similar to medieval handfastings. I'm not certain I remember in what way they're different, though... I'll see if I can do some research on it in the next couple days.  

[Llelwyn]

http://www.medievalscotland.org/history/handfasting.shtml
http://www.drizzle.com/~celyn/mrwp/bib.html

Hopefully those links will give you the information you need.  

[[Atropa Belladonna]]

Well, a handfasting is as simple as a handshake--but it's not a wedding. Handfasting is betrothal at best. The term refers to any pledge by the giving of hands.

Depending on your period, so is making out--in 1532 a betrothal was recognized as legally binding in court which consisted wholely of a man's tongue in his lady's mouth. Next time you wonder how you got yourself into a romantic mess, now you know.

Anyway, a medieval wedding varries greatly depending on your religion, hometown, period, and station. Almost everyone got married just outside the church doors--it is not until the Tudor period that people start getting married inside.

Things that may help:

If you are post-1100, be sure to use the present tense in your vows. If you use the future tense, you are not married--just engaged. Thank Peter Lombard for this.

It is not necessary for a priest to oversee weddings until 1215. In the ninth century it is forbidden for clergy to be involved due to the "bawdy nature" of nuptuals. By 1400 one could be excommunicated for NOT having clergy in attendence--but a priest was not actually required (don't ask me... I don't get it) until 1563. These rules govern Catholics--England doesn't care who you wed, or whether you bring a man of the cloth. Scotland recognized any exchange of vows before witnesses as a wedding until 1940.

German Journeymen were not allowed to take wives until they reached the rank of Master.

Traditionally a feast is held at the house of the bride's parents. The party processes to the groom's house and puts the couple to bed there. If this freaks you out, don't have a Viking wedding. Most Germanic guests left the bridal chamber once the bride and groom were tucked in--Viking mother-in-laws watched consumation just to be sure.

Durring most early Christian ceremonies, the couple joined their right hands, and a veil was spread over them. The bride's hair was unbraided or untied and after a benediction both were crowned with floral garlands.

After the 13th century rings were exchanged at the church

Vows are very simple. Starting with "N, do you want this woman?" they progressed to each saying to the other "I give myself to you," and the other responding, "I recieve you," or "I give my body to you," and "I receive it."

The fifteenth-century York Manual gives different vows for man and woman. The man says:

I take the N. to my wedded wyf, to have and to holde, fro this day forwarde, for bettere for wors, for richere for pourer [one manuscript adds ‘for fayrere for fowlere’], in sycknesse and in hele, tyl dethe us depart, if holy chyrche it woll ordeyne, and therto y plight the my trouthe.


And the woman promises:

I take the N to my wedded housbonde, to have and to holde, fro this day forwarde, for better for wors, for richer for pourer, in syckness and in hele, to be bonere and boxsom* , in bedde and atte bord, tyll dethe us departe, if holy chyrche it wol ordeyne, and therto I plight the my trouthe

Medieval wedding rings were worn on the right hand

A maiden (pretend) should be bare-handed, and a widow gloved.

English grooms should wear two knives in one sheath as a symbol of unity.

Throw a shoe, not your bouquet.  

[LittleGreenGirl]

No matter the actual ceremony, a handfasting was traditionally a trial marriage, not just an engagement. Today, an engagement means you pretty much promise to get married, while then, a handfasting was to see if the marriage would actually work. (as mentioned before, though, it depends on the location... not every place used this method) It basically was a marriage for a year and a day. If it was sucessful, the marriage would continue past the period. If not, both parties were free to go. Now, it can mean pretty much whatever you want it to mean, depending on the vows that you take during the ceremony. Usuallly, the hands of the two parties are bound as a symbol of the union (hence the "hand" in "handfasting"...), but the vow can be for a year and a day, or for life, or eternity, or whatever.

edit: My boy and I are going to incorporate handfasting tradtitions into our wedding ceremony, and the minister had already done this before. I would talk to whoever you want to perform the ceremony and ask if they know anything about handfastings, and tweak it from there.  

[Llelwyn]

I would like to point out to LGG that if at any time during the handfasting period the couple did the bouncy bouncy, they were considered married from that point on. 3nodding