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 Posted: Wed Aug 10, 2022 1:31 pm
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 tab Location : Soleil Library | Company : Saeyong | Mood : Terrified of myself | Residence : 1513 Lumiere Housing District | Profile : Here
Occupation : Soliel Librarian | Status : Single | OOC : --
He can remember his clap back vividly. Because his father's life was so close to being gone. He has been so close to freeing them all. He had grabbed his father's face with his bare hands and watched as he struggled to pull himself away, but grew too weak to fight him. Listened as his heart started beating so fast. Too fast for him to be comfortable. He had been so close to being fully free. "I almost killed my father and then promised her that I would kill them both and the twins if they ever went near myself, Sumi, or my brothers again. I haven't seen either of them since. So yes, I would say that I gave a piece of my mind enough to make myself clear." His tension from earlier seems to have eased out. He's never talked about it, not even with Castielle or Masumi. He's not a hundred percent better, but it helps. To admit what he's done and what he's gone through.
He isn't sure what to say about Saeyong claiming that he isn't a monster, because it wasn't technically his own thoughts. But that is the difference between being under Rehan's thumb and not. It's easy for people to see it as not being his fault. But in his mind, he wasn't a victim, he was a willing participant. Even now it still feels like they were his own thoughts and choices. And it isn't like he did a great job protecting Masumi. He nearly killed him with his own hands. Perhaps if Avi was the one who hasn't existed, Sumi would have had an easier life. They only used and hurt Masumi because they wanted something to tether Avi to them. If he had fallen off that balcony with his mother, maybe things would have been easier for his brothers.
When he sees the man ball his hand into a fist, he returns to favor, taking his hand instead to undo his fingers gently and rub them so he can ease out the tension. His own way of offering peace or telling them man that he doesn't feel any different towards him after what he admit to. "I was fortunate to have people who despite what I did to them, wanted to free me from the grasp of those who hurt me. I get the feeling that you didn't have such luxury. Protecting yourself and being selfish because you are your own priority doesn't make you a monster either. You were pushed to a breaking point, it doesn't excuse what either of us has done, but at least it gives some understanding that we are living beings with our own limitations."
He nods, knowIng and feeling like it wouldn't be right for him to get an easy way out. It wouldn't feel deserved if he tried the easy way out of everything. It wouldn't be deserved if he were lazy about it. "I...have odd hobbies that I used to cope. I work here to cope. The quiet helps me stay calm and most people leave me be. But I can't say I have very done anything that has felt...liberating. I wouldn't even know where to begin."
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Posted: Thu Aug 11, 2022 5:10 am
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 ❛ Saeyong Joon ❜
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Anneyong! I’m 준 새용 || I'm feeling Somewhat intrigued and hopeful || I'm speaking to Octavius || Where am I? The Library || What am I wearing? Simple
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The man's eyes darted back up to those pale blues, almost like he was trying to see if the man was honestly saying what he just did. It wasn't that he doubted him not to break at some point, from the amount of things his family had put him through, but more or less the fact that it pushed him to confront the demons that were tormenting him. Everyone has their breaking point, Saeyong knew that and with how he saw the other quite composed more than often, it might have taken quite a bit - with a lot of regret maybe. The latter, he couldn't relate to though, but he could see the patterns of how it must have gone down. "Good, you can confront someone after all." he would say, "Though, to be seen as a decent functioning member of society, you might want to do it more subtly before it reaches the point of no return, when dealing with other individuals." he would trail back to the harassment at work, though it might just go on for a little while before he actually considers it. None the less, it wasn't Saeyong's fight as he was made aware, but he'd gladly step in if needed.
The vision of blood and the slimy feeling of the insides he once held were soon replaced with the man's gloved hand. The feeling of comfort and grounding nature it had to his mental high made him now brush his fingers against his before trying to slip through the spaces between them and hold on. Despite his intention to probably just keep him from hurting himself, Saeyong found it pleasant to hold his hand, listening to what he had to say. "Quite a few limitations." he would say simply, brushing his thumb over his hand as he watched it and let those words sink in. It had been quite a while that someone who knew his dirty secrets to an extent would not consider him a monster, or a selfish lunatic with a hint of psychotic. Maybe more than just a hint. "Thank you." he ended up saying, to break the momentary silence that grew between them and possibly the awkward hand holding that he initiated. There was a hint of emotion on his face again, as he eased his hand away, a little flush of pink along his skin as he looked away. He was embarrassed that the thank you was more genuine than rehearsed but the other certainly deserved it - most of all for putting up with him.
As he tried to realign his thoughts to something less, gloomy, while he attempts to drag him out of the depressive cycle, he looked back at him with a light tilt to his head. Somehow, despite his limited emotional range, the other should be able to tell that he wasn't amused. "You...work here to cope?" he asked, like he was trying to confirm if he heard him right. He mostly imagined a perfectionist or someone who had a strong compulsive desire to see everything in order but as he continued, he pondered on it and crossed his arms across his chest. "Silence can begin to haunt you at some point, you should try something else to live a little more." he would say, "I choose pain as one of the things, but it doesn't have to be as extreme for you." he continues.
As the man ponders over it a little longer, he knew that sexual interactions were also out of the question, but what about little thrills like riding a rollercoaster, or speeding vehicle, things that sent adrenalin rushing through ones veins. But, it was Saeyong's limitations that made him opt for high risk/thrill activities, maybe Octavius didn't need the same. "When was the last time you actually did something without calculating every living moment of it and did it because you wanted to?" he'd ask, letting his body drop forward to try and prove a point as he aimed for his leg to break the drop, but if the man chose to move away before he did, he wouldn't fight it and take the fall with minute recovery time as he'd prop himself on his elbow, brushing his hair back with his free hand. His way to also ease into the next words that would leave his mouth. "Lets go out tomorrow and try things on your bucket list." he would suggest, mostly curious about what he would be up for - if he would be up for it.
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O.O.C.
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Posted: Thu Aug 11, 2022 10:48 am
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tab Location : Soleil Library | Company : Saeyong | Mood : Unsure | Residence : 1513 Lumiere Housing District | Profile : Here
Occupation : Soliel Librarian | Status : Single | OOC : --
He makes a sound, one that can almost be taken as a huff of a laugh if it hadn't been cut off so quickly and he hadn't made a face like he was confused. Confused about his reaction. Like he never laughs at anything anymore. He is pretty sure he always laughs at Castielle's ridiculous jokes. But now that he thinks about it...maybe they don't sound like laughs after all... "I know that..." He grimaces as he thinks about the times that he technically confronted Saeyong when he was feeling harassed by the man. "I will work on it..." He instead amends, trying not to grimace again as he shrinks down a little. Maybe he doesn't know how to properly confront people in a way that isn't aggressive. He even sassed that lady who put her shoes on the table by knocking off her feet and telling her to go home if she can't respect the library. Or that time that he almost broke the floor at the gym when he dropped the weights because someone came in his vicinity minding their own business. And then his dad...yeah...maybe he really doesn't know.
He gives a shrug when thanked, not really feeling like he's done more than tell the truth on how he sees it. On the surface, people would see them as murderers. But he's been under that surface with his own trauma, so he knows there is more to it than what a person assumes. Avi was manipulated and used like a puppet, and Saeyong was used and pushed to limits which broke him in a way. They were shaped by their experiences, and have different ways of coping with that. "Not everyone understands it, but I do, in a way." He relaxes his hand when Saeyong releases it, letting him pull it away so he can return his hand to his own lap. It was strange to have been holding hands with someone who wasn't Masumi, but he supposed that it will feel like that for awhile. Where little things he took for granted feel strange.
He leans back against the shelf as he closes his eyes with a sigh. "My days were filled with screaming, fighting, weapons, and bickering. Everyday was noisy. When I have silence...when I am here working or reading...I feel at ease. Silence is peace, and a reminder that things are different. That I am not still stuck there." He opens his eyes as he draws out another sigh and clasps his own hands together in his lap. "It is only when I am home that the silence feels heavy. My brothers used to fill the space so much, that it makes me realize how alone I am there. So I work until they practically kick me out." His head shifts so he can look at Saeyong again. "That is how I cope. With the quiet, but the subtle noises of people around me so I am not alone. It is better than forcing myself to be in crowded spaces where I don't feel like I don't belong." Where he can hurt someone with just a small touch of skin.
He turns his head to look up at the ceiling as he hums in thought. It is a provoking question. And it is probably telling that he has to think for a bit to find a moment where he didn't plan things out. "When I took the leap and kissed Masumi. I was older than him by a few years, but I was terrified. What if he hated me for it? What if he thought I was disgusting for having those feelings?" His lips twitch, a small smile spreading, though it is sad. "But I was a stupid teenager with a dream of a future and just acted, without really thinking about it. We ended up falling over because he got so flustered that he nearly tackled me. After that...I couldn't afford to be reckless, because we had to make sure no one found out about us. Secret glances, carefully timed meetings where we could at least share kisses and hushed words. I had to be careful, and precise from then on, for both our sakes." He gives a laugh, but it is more bitter as he rubs his hand down his face. "And it didn't even matter in the end. I wasted so much time being careful with him and they found out anyways."
He drops his hand from his face, just now realizing that Saeyong put his head on his leg. He hesitates, before helping Saeyong move his hair by brushing it away. He's careful, making sure not to add too much pressure. Always reminding himself that what he is touching can be broken if he isn't delicate. "What if I do not have one? The things I wanted to do were taken from me, and now I can't find myself wanting to do much else but work."
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Posted: Thu Aug 11, 2022 11:41 am
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❛ Saeyong Joon ❜
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Anneyong! I’m 준 새용 || I'm feeling Somewhat intrigued and hopeful || I'm speaking to Octavius || Where am I? The Library || What am I wearing? Simple
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Saeyong would look at him with confusion lacing his features, much like the other. Somehow it felt like he was holding back something. Was he worried about how he was going to take his reaction? He assumed they were past that for now. Maybe he was equally unsure about what he felt. Odd, he often thought he was the one who couldn't piece two and two together when it came to how he felt- confused and reacting in the way he deemed appropriate or what came naturally. Maybe besides rough pasts, there was more that they had in common. "You should." he would admit, "And express yourself with no remorse, people will make opinions about you anyways." he would state, almost like telling him he was allowed to be himself - at least around him. That was one thing Saeyong was good at, being himself. He could come up with a rehearsed response, but often would just react the way it naturally came - which was a little limited.
"Maybe that is why you are so amusing to me." he would admit, when the other admitted that he understood. At least to an extent. Though, with the tone he said it in, he half expected a whack on his head or maybe a little verbal something to which he braced himself by keeping his hues on his palm, where the others' was, looking back at him shortly after.
When the man spoke, Saeyong listened as his mind painted him a picture of the subtle parallels. For Octavius it was family, the drama that came with them, blood, gore - all that seemed straight out of a traumatic drama. For Saeyong, it was the flashing lights, screaming fans, drama from the lives he ruined by partaking in affairs and just lack of silence for himself too. Even though highly stimulating spaces were hard to be in sometimes, he found himself more and more drawn to them...more often than he would appreciate. Maybe that was his way of keeping himself from being lonely, while the other chose a whole different approach. Sometimes, he did too, but more than often fell back into his routine. "Being home is hard for me, even though the silence can be nice. So, I can see what being here means to you." he would say. "I'll drop by more often to keep you company then. You can also give me the directions to your place, I'll bring some good quality booze." he would add, patting his shoulder, "I also have boardgames so we can hit redo on our childhood by having sleepovers." he would add, as silly as it sounded, he would probably show up with the promised items if he would only leave so much as a crack for him to enter.
Saeyong was looking up at him from his resting spot on his leg, trying to read his emotions the best he could. It sounded surreal, almost like it was out of a movie he failed to comprehend again, seeing some of the women he was acquainted with dream for an affair as such. His lacked emotion if anything, for him, he wasn't certain about what he wanted so, it only made sense that his little flings resulted in nothing but heartbreak for mostly the other and just a feeling of void for himself. His gaze trailed away as he failed to find any acceptable words to say to him, "I think some where, it mattered to the two of you." he would say, "Maybe, it might bring you two together, in the future?" he would suggest, though he didn't recall if he already said that his ex lover had moved on. "But if you take my advice, looking back will only result in discomfort."
Saeyong's hues trail at the man's hand as it hesitantly makes its way towards him, looking back up as he was prepared for any reaction the man had, until he realized he wasn't. He looked a little surprised when he was brushing his hair, though he could barely feel those gloved fingers gliding over his light hair. His thoughts were put to a halt when he heard the other, bringing his hand up to his own chin as he brushed it in thought. They were quite different in some aspects, so suggesting something he would enjoy didn't seem like the right bet. "We will have to work on one." he admitted, though as soon as his words left his mouth is when he realized he wasn't truly opposed to living a little. "Do you want to go to the beach? It's quite lovely with a decent aquatic life. Maybe try out a new drink from the café or bar. Is this the season where flowers bloom? I forget, but there's a park with lovely flowers." he began listing, trying to filter out the ones that involved less people or crowded places. Though, maybe some of his guesses weren't completely on point. "We could also go to the museum, I heard one Halloween, people were abducted. But other than that, its quite peaceful." he would add, watching him as he waited on a response.
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O.O.C.
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Posted: Fri Aug 12, 2022 11:42 am
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tab Location : Soleil Library | Company : Saeyong | Mood : Cautious | Residence : 1513 Lumiere Housing District | Profile : Here
Occupation : Soliel Librarian | Status : Single | OOC : --
He's only ever cared for one person's opinion. And because Sumi was always honest with him, he already knows what that opinion is. It isn't as bad as he thought. Their last talk in person when Avi left, was bittersweet in a way. Masumi had his prototype ring on for the nullification magic so they could hug without needing gloves. His assurances that he still loves Avi and thinks he's a good person inside broke Avi more than he realized at the time. It hurt to have Masumi stroke his face without keeling over in pain. It left a brand on his skin when Masumi pressed a kiss to his forehead and ran his fingers through Avi's hair. It was intimate, and he ached for more. But he knew that it was a goodbye, a last shred of bliss before he left and distanced himself from all of them. They hugged, and he nearly gave up leaving and letting Carter have him when they both slipped their hands underneath one another's shirts. Masumi's hand warm against his hip, and his against the small of Sumi's back. Both of them just shared the knowledge that they could have this one last bit of them until it was gone. Maybe one day he will feel bad about placing his hands on Masumi's face to press a kiss into his lips. He will regret leaving things with one intense kiss without fear of hurting each other. "I don't care how people perceive me. I only care about who I hurt." Because how he perceives himself is the real problem. He's too busy being stuck under that to really pay attention to anyone else. To him, he's a killer and he's a monster. He just expects everyone else to see it that way.
"I don't drink," is his first response after all that the man has said. He's not regressing and falling back into monosyllables, but he didn't really have responses or reactions to the other comments. The library IS important to him for many reasons, and Saeyong has made it very clear that teasing Avi has become a pastime for him when he's here. "I don't like feeling hazy, and I don't like not having control over myself. My ability is already random as it is. But when drinking, it's somehow worse unless I am focusing really hard on it." The one time he got drunk, he was lucky that he was so focused on Masumi and not hurting him that he managed to keep his ability under control because it would have been unfortunate considering what they were doing. It would have definitely killed the mood. Though Masumi had anyways by being impatient, throwing a fit because Avi stopped him from doing something reckless, and then promptly passed out from crying so much. Apparently Masumi didn't take the rejection of Avi taking his virginity very well and went level 3 meltdown on Avi. After that, both of them decided that they didn't care much for drinking. They were kind of stupid and careless when they did drink. "The only time I tried wasn't a great experience towards the end."
He grimaces a little at the mention of someone coming over, the room filled with broken scraps, broken furniture in broken glass shards in boxes coming to mind. He tends to go through furniture a lot, and still has yet to donate the scraps for people to reuse. It felt wrong to just throw it out…but it doesn't exactly paint a great picture. "I haven't exactly…finished settling in. There is barely any furniture and I don't own a TV." Something even a bookworm like Castielle laments. He personally never used a TV, nor has he really ever seen the appeal of owning one. He might have also started working before he actually moved in fully. At least the kitchen is stocked? "I don't exactly prepare for any guests either."
"It meant the world to me, still does. But we have both closed to chapter we shared. He's with someone who doesn't hurt him now. Someone who is willing to give him his freedom and his voice back. I couldn't guarantee he would be happy with me, even if I wanted to." Couldn't just bury all of the trauma and the hurt they caused one another. There was no way to return to what they were. Not when part of Avi, the part Masumi fell in love with, is still stuck under Rehan's thumb, forever out of Avi's reach. So he gives a shrug as he takes a deep breath to make sure he doesn't start hyperventilating because it is a lot to think about. "I don't want to forget either."
He makes a face at the mention of the beach, already knowing that it isn't a likely choice of the beach is packed with people. "I was advised to visit the beach some time, but I've been hesitant since there is usually a lot of exposed skin involved. Too many opportunities to bump into someone. Cafe's are okay if they aren't busy, and the park is nice when it isn't busy with people either." Clearly there is a pattern here. Another awkward shrug as he moves his hands back to his sides to rest them on the ground. Better to not take any risks with touching someone at all. He still makes a skeptical face about the abductions part. "I didn't know there was a museum here."
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Posted: Sat Aug 13, 2022 4:33 am
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❛ Saeyong Joon ❜
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Anneyong! I’m 준 새용 || I'm feeling Somewhat intrigued and hopeful || I'm speaking to Octavius || Where am I? The Library || What am I wearing? Simple
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The man had turned to rest on his back now, with the man's leg still propping his head up a little. He squinted lightly from the lights over their heads, not that it bothered it much, but it took a moment to adjust to, before he shifted his attention back up to the man as he spoke. "Their opinions tend to lose value once you see them moving on so quickly, while you're suck in the past." he would speak, something that came from some of his own experiences. He recalled how he had killed the first man who ever laid hands on him, who took away the innocence behind those eyes when he was still a boy. He was cursed and abused by his wife, she even said things that a young boy, victim of the horrors he had gone through, shouldn't have heard. While it didn't seem to affect him much, the words remained, carving themselves in his brain to a point he just wanted to make them disappear and maybe talk to her to see how he could make it right. But, she...didn't seem as upset anymore. He didn't get to speak to her, but he watched her from a distance and she was nothing less than what he perceived as happy. At least he learned something that day.
The man's hues shifted back to the other when he admitted he didn't drink. A hand went up to his hair, his fingers combing through them as he pushed it all away from his forehead in thought. "Alright, no drinks then." he would respond, it didn't matter if there would be drinks involved in their interactions, but he figured that it would be something to loosen themselves up and be free-er. To be honest, sometimes he didn't know why he drank, he didn't necessarily need it too much and it impaired his own motor skills. It started with using it to keep his victims from making rational choices, to just a social thing. None the less, he wasn't going to push him to drink with him after admitting what he did, though, tempted he was to see what would happen if he was unstable and touched him like before. "Do you want to come to my place then?" he would ask, pushing that thought to the back burner as he focused on the task at hand, "I don't either, my personal space is quite personal for me. But, you'll be an exception I'm willing to make." he would add, looking back at him.
As promiscuous as he was, he often preferred keeping his personal space to himself, quiet and untouched, like it used to be. He trusted the other enough to let him in, mostly because he knew he wasn't like anyone else he knew in the past. Besides, he always needed an untainted spot for himself, devoid of the filth he associated with and a place to just, exist.
"You shouldn't be the only one to decide that." Saeyong responded to him, casting a glance back to him before he sighed and sat up again, upright as he brushed his hair back in place, though he wasn't one to give out love counsel when he was pretty terrible at it himself. "I suppose you can put the idea forward next time, when there is a next time. You know, allow your partner to decide if you two can make it work." he added before glancing back at him. "Maybe you wont have your ex's photo on your phone then." he teased.
Turning around to face him better now, he pondered on his words at the various options that he put before him. He could see that he was worried about people, exposed skin and well, potential touches. "We can give you a wetsuit if you want to go to the beach, or I know a few spots around that are quite isolated and still lovely to look at. But, you cant be taking people there, I discovered them first." he would say, childishly, though he was a tiny bit serious about it since he liked to sit on the shore there himself in times where he missed home. He didn't have much of a counter or comment for the cafe's or parks since he wasn't all too keen about them himself, "Oh there is, I heard it has the fruit on display too. I haven't been there myself so we can go there if you want. You wont have to worry about crowds there or exposed skin." he would added, "Follow it up with lunch or dinner, and we can call it a date."
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O.O.C.
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Posted: Mon Aug 15, 2022 3:07 pm
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tab Location : Soleil Library | Company : Saeyong | Mood : Unsure | Residence : 1513 Lumiere Housing District | Profile : Here
Occupation : Soliel Librarian | Status : Single | OOC : --
"If staying still in the past means I will continue to remember what I am, then I plan to stay right where I am. I don't want to forget what I was or what I did. I need to remember it so I don't let it happen again." Though his break down earlier reminded him that he certainly has a long way to go before he ever reaches a point of being okay again. Where he can confidently say that he isn't that person at all anymore. But it isn't something that happens overnight, and he knows that he has a lot of work to do with himself before he will ever get there. He can see what Saeyong means with changing, because if you don't, everything will pass you by. If he doesn't allow change, he will never reach a point of being "better", where is laughs don't confuse him anymore, and where smiles are happy and not sad. "But...I suppose that I can't stay stuck in everything if I want my situation to change." It made him think of the ring still on his finger under his glove, almost branding his skin as a reminder. It would have to start with that thing. He needs to get rid of it.
"Your place?" The man looks down at him with a look that said he was starting to question the man's sanity. Why on Earth would he want some random person to come over to his place? For Avi, it wasn't really "home" to him yet, so having someone over wasn't a big deal. He just didn't have the accommodations for a guest. But Saeyong has been here longer than him probably, and has probably had the time to claim his space for himself. "I am unsure why you would ever want to be with me in a private setting considering out interactions." He looks like he considers the thought before eventually shrugging. "Okay." That simple. It isn't like he is worried about getting hurt, as he has the skills to defend himself just fine. But he doesn't really get a vibe that he has to worry about fighting to keep his life in this scenario. "When I am better settled, I can return the sentiment." Meaning that the offer is returned when Avi manages to get his house in order to actually have people over.
"It wasn't just my decision. I wanted to work on my issues, and he wanted to work for his. We mutually agreed that we didn't have a healthy relationship, though that didn't lessen the feelings for one another. It just made us more determined to work on ourselves to be better. Not really for each other, but for ourselves and the futures we want." Futures they knew didn't involve one another anymore. It was hard to see one another that way after everything. Which is why it is easier for him to say what he does next without feeling like bile is rising in his throat. The sting is there in his chest, but it isn't as unbearable as the other day in the grocery store. "Before he was my lover, he was my dearest friend. I don't want that to change just because we decided we don't work. I just hope we can get back to that when we heal."
He doesn't really comment on the date bit, instead lifting his hand to pull the glove off so he can take off the ring. With his gloved hand, he reaches to Saeyong's to set the ring in his palm with his bare hand, careful not to touch him. After, he slides on his glove again with a sigh. "I will go and do whatever you suggest if you get rid of that. Sell it, keep it, throw it out. I do not care. I will never be rid of it if I try to keep it to do it myself and I need to let it go. I want to start there."
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Posted: Tue Aug 16, 2022 8:18 am
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❛ Saeyong Joon ❜
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Anneyong! I’m 준 새용 || I'm feeling Somewhat intrigued and hopeful || I'm speaking to Octavius || Where am I? The Library || What am I wearing? Simple
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"That part of us is so deeply engraved in our minds, I don't think we can forget even if we truly wanted to. But we can surely learn to live with it, to where it doesn't hinder our lives." he would respond, it wasn't like the other wasn't aware of that, at least he thought. He could tell so much by the way he was so careful about everything he did, including what he felt earlier on with him brushing his hair away from his face. He also seemed to remind himself, more himself than anyone else it would seem, by every little detail to be accounted for. Somewhere in the back of his own mind, Saeyong remembered too, though he wasn't actively trying to keep a leash around himself. The man would look back at the other when he spoke, nodding at his observation. "Right on the money." he would respond.
Saeyong would nod in confirmation when the man verbalized the thought he presented earlier, yes, he was allowing someone to come to his house. The look he made wasn't lost on him, but he would narrow his gaze as though he was intending to study the reason behind that look he gave him. His statement that followed gave him a hint, to which he would cross his arms across his chest in thought, "Well, for starters, I know I don't have to have my guard up with you, and I suppose I wouldn't mind the company." he would state, trying hard to think of other reasons, which would sound somewhat convincing. In all honesty, he wasn't trying to do anything wrong so he shouldn't even have to think so much. But, there he was. He looked at the man for a moment when he agreed. That simple 'okay' somehow much simpler than he expected that it took him a moment to realize he had agreed. Once it settled in, he nodded and looked back at the other with a slight glimmer behind those hues, "I need to know your food preferences and favorite pass times that are remotely entertaining. Even allergies list if you have that." he would add, making a fair attempt at being a good host. "You don't have to, unless you really wish to." he would quickly add, trying to tell the other it was quite alright on his part if he wasn't allowed to his home for any reason.
Saeyong sat there in respectful silence as he heard the other clarify the situation between him and his ex, looking back occasionally to make sure he was alright. He let those words sink in, trying to comprehend why the man would still want to hold on to those memories if they hurt still. He did explain, that he saw him as his dearest friend, but was that truly enough to want to be put through eternal suffering? In his silence as he was still thinking, he looked back at the other when he could notice him fidgeting from the corner of his eye. He turned over to face him better and held his hand out when he placed a ring on his hand. He looked down at it and examined it, only to look back at what the other had to say. Maybe his assumption wasn't far from the truth, but he wasn't sure if he should have voiced it, "Was this to represent you two?" he said anyways, but would quickly put it into his pocket without much of a thought. "If you're certain, I will not entertain you asking it back anytime in the future." he admitted. If he truly wanted it gone, it would be gone for good. Though for now, he had no clue what he was going to do with it, besides sell it.
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O.O.C.
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Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2022 11:27 pm
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Posted: Sun Apr 02, 2023 12:27 pm
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۩ Solomon Romero/Adramelech ۩
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ண
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♞Solomon found himself in a truly quiet place as much as the library could be it was enough. To send his mind to another plane of existence, he sat next to a window. In the corner tinted windows for privacy and his back to the wall so he could keep his guard up. He was very aware despite his surroundings, but the book he was reading was worth the read. it was a fantasy novel about losing everything, but it all back through determination and sheer will. A story not for the faint of heart full of gore, sex, violence, torture, and other darker themes. Yet in between these themes, the light of hope always shone through. It sounded a bit corny and cliche but it worked no man can survive in despair less they be walking husk of their former self. Solomon could relate to the book on a personal level he was far from the ruthless killer he once was. Being in this city had mellowed him down a bit and in his mind, he entertained the thought of a lover. ♞The thought was interrupted by a shark's pain in the side of his neck. With phantom pain from that bite, Atuma gave him not too long ago, he stop himself from touching the bandaged wound. Instead, he focused on the book the name called The Trials Of Darkfire. He was on book one of three and he was keen on taking some home with him. There was someone he was waiting for someone...special. ▇▇▇▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇ 々▇▇▇▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇▇▇▇
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OCC:
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Posted: Wed Apr 05, 2023 8:04 am
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"Try to knock some sense / Down in my bones / And even though they don't show / The scars aren't so old / And when they go / They let you know
You can't put your arms around a memory / You can't put your arms around a memory / You can't put your arms around a memory / Don't try, don't try"
☆═━┈ xxxx ┈━═☆Hands you a Business Card ❦ Voice Recognition ❦ I'm S-single ❦ My Pad: 1424 Doux District ❦ My Role: Coroner☥≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎☯≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎☥
It was about time he got back into reading medical journals. With his concussion finally gone he was able to keep his mind focused on one thing long enough while still being able to process that he could read the dense articles one encountered in such a technical publication. How the man who got sick at the thought of meat and nearly passed out at a death match could read about surgical processes as calmly as could be was a question not even he could answer. As magazines could not be checked out he would need to finish catching up here, and preferably in as few days as possible. That said, he would need something lighter at home to help his mind to relax after a tough day at work. With journals and a notebook and a pencil in hand he retired to the same table at which sat Solo. He had set his things down just in time to catch a flash of pain cross Solo’s countenance followed by his hand rising slightly to touch the injury. Emi quickly put his hand on top of Solo’s, ”don’t touch it,” he whispered. ”Do you want me to check it?” He had redressed the injury this morning, but perhaps he had messed up or maybe there was an irritant in the bandages themselves? As the pseudo-doctor of the household he took it upon himself to ensure his friend’s well-being, or at least be there to patch up his friend in case of trouble. Fortunately the need to patch had been steadily decreasing. ”Or do I need to hold your hand so you can’t pick on it?” He bore a slight smirk, confident Solo would scoff at him, but he supposed if his bestie actually wanted to hold hands he could do it. Friendly affection was always welcome.
☥≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎☯≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎☥Stiffs: Hans Solo ❦ Mood Meter: Depressed █▇▇▇▇▇▇█▇▇▇▇▇▇█ Manic ❦ Wearing: Warm Goth ❦ Out Of Corpses He blundering into your trap Solo.☆═━┈ xxxx ┈━═☆"Take the blade away from me / I am a freak, I am afraid that / All the blood escaping me won't end the pain / And I'll be haunting all the lives that cared for me / I died to be the white ghost / Of the man that I was meant to be" |
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Posted: Mon Apr 10, 2023 12:13 am
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۩ Solomon Romero/Adramelech ۩
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ண
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♞Solomon had hoped that Emi did not see his face or his movement but the man had good timing he guessed. It started with hand-over-hand touch. If he was blushing slightly Solomon didn't show it nor could it be seen, but this action spoke for him. He took Emi hand gently into his own and smoothly at that, and looked him right in the eyes. "Be my guest...and thanks it has been irritating lately" he said breaking the handhold just before it got awkward up in here. "What am I doing? he thought to himself but he knew the reason why he didn't want to say it. Solomon was hoping Adram would confirm his budding feelings, hell he already went out of his way for a gift. Though there was no response coming from the Kitsune most likely he was meditating. His foot unsoundly moved ever so slightly against a bag by his foot. The gift he bought for Emi is on its way here. ♞The slick man saw it in the window display and knew that Emi would love it and maybe even have a heart attack. The thought of giving Emi CPR was not unpleasing to the brooding male. He barely caught Emi's words but they made him smirk as well " Only if you take me out to dinner first" Solomon was half joking but since he said that s**t might as well go in? " Perhaps...I'll get that dinner date after all after you've seen what I got you" With that, he reached down and pulled out a jet-black bag. His arms crossed " I saw it and I just bought it for you even though I don't know why...just don't mess it up alright (baka) Enjoy Emelius." For once in a long time Solomon's voice was softer and had a bit more emotion to it. Even more so was that handsome genuine smile he was truly opening up to the man in front of him. Deep in his meditation within Solomon's mind, Adram was smiling ear to ear. He didn't need to tell Solomon what he was feeling was...love. ▇▇▇▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇ 々▇▇▇▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇▇▇▇
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OCC:
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Posted: Mon Apr 10, 2023 5:52 am
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"Try to knock some sense / Down in my bones / And even though they don't show / The scars aren't so old / And when they go / They let you know
You can't put your arms around a memory / You can't put your arms around a memory / You can't put your arms around a memory / Don't try, don't try"
☆═━┈ xxxx ┈━═☆Hands you a Business Card ❦ Voice Recognition ❦ I'm S-single ❦ My Pad: 1424 Doux District ❦ My Role: Coroner☥≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎☯≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎☥
Damn, so he had messed up. But he couldn’t exactly fix it at the moment cause Solo was…holding his hand? Huh, he hadn’t really expected that. It had felt nice in the short time it lasted, but soon Solo’s hand rocketed back to his side. ”Aww, he’s trying to show affection! That’s really sweet of him. It must be hard for him to drop the hard exterior, even around someone like me, a benign friend.” Never did he suspect he was anything other than a friend. Still, he gave Solo a reassuring smile, hoping maybe that would give his friend a bit more confidence when it came to sweetness. Maybe he should have started working on the bandage, but he had a suspicion Solo had something else in mind, and very soon he was proven right. Before he could even tell Solo he would gladly take him out to dinner, Solo had given him a present. ”Ooh! The bag is even my favorite color! You know me so well!” As soon as he opened the present he realized how accurate his words had been. He had to bite down on his lip just to keep from squealing like a teen seeing the Beatles on the Ed Sullivan show. ”OHMYGODTHISISSOCUTE!!!! I get to be the mothman! Better watch out, if you see me around a bridge! Unless I get distracted by a light…It’s super soft too! Have you felt it yet Hansy? Oh, of course you have you’re the one who bought it.” He hugged it tight and squirmed in delight. ”As soon as we get home I’m going to change into this! Thank you so so so much Solo!” Without thinking he leaned down and gave Solo a great big hug. Would have been a bear hug if it hadn’t felt so much like being hugged by vines. ”I guess I’m taking you out to dinner tonight then. Or I could fix something once we got home, but I hadn’t planned anything special so I’d have to go shopping…” He flopped down into the chair, still snuggling the mothman onesie. ”Oh! I was supposed to be checking your neck! I’m sorry I got distracted. Lemme take a look at it now, ok?” His fingers darted around Solo’s throat like a grandaddy longlegs in platform boots, yet he undid the bandage ever so gently. ”Hmm, I think it is healing well, but I might have something to numb it a bit for you.” He dug through the backpack he carried with him until he found his little medkit, which had been modified with Solo in mind. ”It might sting a little at first, but this should help make it feel better soon.” He dabbed a spot of ointment on his finger, then carefully rubbed it into Solo’s neck, tracing around the injury itself. ”Now I’m going to wrap it back up. I promise I’m not strangling you or anything.” He pulled some gauze bandages out and began wrapping them snugly around Solo’s neck. ”It’s kinda weird working on a living patient. Ninety-nine percent of the people I work with don’t blink an eye when I cut their chest open or pull out their organs. Bet living people wouldn’t be too cool with that.” Way to reassure him there, Emi.
☥≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎☯≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎≎☥Stiffs: Solo ❦ Mood Meter: Depressed █▇▇▇▇▇▇█▇▇▇▇▇▇█ Manic ❦ Wearing: Warm Goth ❦ Out Of Corpses Watch what you wish for…☆═━┈ xxxx ┈━═☆"Take the blade away from me / I am a freak, I am afraid that / All the blood escaping me won't end the pain / And I'll be haunting all the lives that cared for me / I died to be the white ghost / Of the man that I was meant to be" |
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Posted: Mon Apr 10, 2023 8:45 am
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۩ Solomon Romero/Adramelech ۩
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ண
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Solomon would notice that smile Emi made after the hand holding did…did he have his approval? “ Hm, that smile then there is only one thing left to do…seal the deal” he thought to himself. “ I wouldn’t be much of a friend if didn’t know your ikes,” he said in response to Emi's reaction to the jet-black bag. Got to earn those brownie points somehow right? Solomon was taken aback by Emi reaction somewhat when was the last time he had seen the man, so excited very few and far between this was a nice change of pace. Solomon scoffed playfully when Emi called him Hansy even making him chuckle a bit. “Hansy huh? I’ll remember that as for the Mothman don’t go around giving people heart attacks…or do I don’t care. As for the fabric I made sure to check it was comfortable and warm Mr jack Skeleton.” He offered Emi a smile after that jack skeleton comment for his friend did fit that bill, and his height didn’t help his case either. Then came the hug and the gratitude it sort of shocked the man and his reaction were a bit late. Solomon hugged him back just enough “ No problem Emi enjoy,” he said in a tone he hardly uses soft. As for dinner, he mulled it over for a few seconds it would be more intimate if they stayed home and cooked. Perhaps they could cook together it would be more personal best of all more private. “ I’ll take you up on that home cooking offer I’ll even help you out if you want." This whole time Solomon was holding back his blushes he was doing a good job of it, not that Emi could tell. Emi did a one-eighty as he went into medic mode and started to check on Solomon's wound. He ignored the onlookers who might be looking at them from afar and he’d give them a look that said beat it! “ Thanks, Emi-” Solomon winced from the pain but he took it like a champ. The Strangling comment drew forth another chuckle “ Hey I just might like your hands around my neck” he quipped slyly. Then he got all morbid about organs and corpses “ You’re lucky I’m not the queasy probably throw up all over this table.’"Another joke from him they had that in common they were both morbid individuals. Hell Solomon had killed his fair share of people his no stranger to the macabre. Perhaps that was just another fascist of their dynamic. ▇▇▇▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇ 々▇▇▇▇▇▇ 々 ▇▇▇▇▇▇
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OCC: Eh it will be worth it wink
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