Extremely Confused

[Tigcat2]

Hallo. I'm fourteen. /wanted to get that aside from the beginning.
I go by Alex, or Lucas, or Luke, or whatever else.

I'm Pansexual. I would say I'm a lesbian, but I like boys -- in a /gay/ way. I would say I'm gay, but I like girls in a lesbian /and/ straight way. Does that make sense?

I also believe I'm Trans*. I'm physically female, but about 90% or more of the time, I feel like a man. The other roughly 10% I feel /kind of/ female.

The reason I'm saying this: Isn't that a "sin"? I mean..if it is..I can't help it. I'm going to use a commonly used statement: You can't help who you fall in love with. And I just so happened to fall in love with a beautiful, amazing /girl/.
Isn't being Trans* a "sin"? Isn't that "living in sin"?

I'm just horribly confused..I mean, if "God" (a long time ago I broke off from religion, but this has been bothering me for the past month or so) is going to punish me for something I can't control..How is that "just" and "right"?

I don't know. Someone help me sort it out?  

[Phantom Jutsu]

well I can see that your self view seems clouded and confused.....the truth is, we are all born with sin. Sin was passed to all of us with Adam's faliar. With out God's help we sin with out trying. And whether we set out to do it or Not, Sin is still a violation of a law set down by a perfect and just God. Sinners are bound in the chains of sin; but God offers a salvation that brakes the chains and gives you the chance to fight the sin.  

[PuellaSumDei]

Regarding the gender topic, and homosexuality...It's acting on that sexuality that's considered sin. I believe that the sin in considering yourself homosexual is having sexual relations with those of the same gender.

"...If a man sleeps with a man as with a woman, that have both done a detestable thing..."
Levictus 21:13

Also, God made that body of yours, he knew all your attributes before you were born. He planned you to be born the way you were...  

[d i m i r h e x]

At the age of fourteen a lot is going on hormonally.
No one can blame you for being confused, but I honestly feel as if your hormones are running rampant and that you are going through a lot of changes that you, yourself do not understand yet.
It seems like you have a lot of growing up to do before you truly understand who you are as a person and sexually.

Personally, I would start by praying to God and asking for his wisdom, understanding and guidance while I went through this difficult and confusing time.
(That is just me though)

I would also reach out to a school counselor about my sexuality.
Then I`d seek out professional help about possibly being transgender.

Transgenders usually go through some testing to see if they have the characteristics of the sex they feel they are since there are chromosomes changed around or even missing.
There are even brain tests you can take (all professionally) to see if you are what you claim.
However, like I said at fourteen you are at the cusp of finding out who you are mentally and sexually and the dust has not yet settled for you.

Also, I do not believe that being transgender is a choice, let alone wrong since there is proof out there to prove that transgenders are made up differently.
That is not their fault in anyway shape or form. You cannot choose your chromosomes, or brain functions that is pure science.