Somebody Make Me Feel Better =_=

[Ryu Redwings]

Uuuuugh.
I'm in such a bad mood, and don't know what to do with myself at all.
The day started out so nice too!
I basically spent a majority of the day drawing, on the computer, and playing video games.
Then I went to the art studio to help with the all night lock-in since I was going to be teaching a workshop.
Which was totally fine since I messed around with a few friends while we setting up, and then Pedro and I went back to my house for tacos and to grab Monopoly.
All was fine until my dad got home.
I swear, he acts like a child no matter what.
All the attention has to be on him, all the time, no matter who is in the house.
We're basically all at dinner, Pedro's sitting next to me as we try to eat relatively quickly, and he just kept making these horrendous (and inappropriate) jokes and being as loud as possible.
Then he offers to give us a ride back to the studio, but commences to complain the entire way there, finding every possible way to steer the conversation back to himself.
I'm just glad Pedro can tell when I'm getting kind of pissed off since he turned the conversation to Pokemon somehow, and my dad shut up.
He drops us off at the studio, and says he'll come pick me up at 9:30 since that's the latest you can leave the lock-in if you're not staying.
I wait until 9:30 and guess who doesn't show up?
My dad being the crack whore he is, is off getting stoned somewhere.
I had to wait until 11 to try and get home, and even then I had to take the bus.
I don't even know why I bother anymore!
I expect him to do stuff when he's completely unreliable!!
And here I am, home and not at the lock-in because we've got this 'family' walk thing tomorrow!
What the hell, I'm supposed to be walking around tomorrow pretending everything's just fine when my dad the biggest abusive a*****e in the world.
I should have stayed at the lock-in, but I was really too upset to stick around anyway.
All I would have done is been a complete downer because of how upset he got me.
And what sucks even more is that I can't even tell my friends because I'm too ******** scared to tell them!
"Oh hey, the reason I hate my dad is because he's an abusive crack-loving ********! He's totally not the awesome guy you all think he is!"
UGH.
All I was doing was wandering around the studio, trying to explain to my friends why my dad wasn't picking me up because he was off 'doing stuff'.
And now I'm tired, and cranky (if you can't tell, lol), and he's still wandering the house stoned out of his god damn mind.
I can't even get out of this damned house anymore because my friend Gracie, the one I was supposed to get an apartment with next year, is transferring to a school in Massachusetts.
WAY TO WARN ME GRACE!
Thanks for telling me this two weeks before the semester ends!
Thank you so much!!
I'm going to stop now because I'm pretty sure I can just keep going at this rate...

Post pictures of kittens or something, I dunno...
I just needed to rant really badly, and I still feel like crap.

tl;dr: ******** you, you, and you. Twice. With a jackhammer.  

[PainfullyVivid]

Kittens and Rainbows!



Maybe you should start out by telling one of your friends. At least then you will be able to rant to one of them.

Wow. Did she just figured out that she is transferring? O.o  

[Ryu Redwings]

RAINBOWS!

Yeah, basically, and just sort of told me this week.
:/
I'm more or less hiding the fact that I'm pissed at her for the sake of the friendship.
Plus, who needs that kind of drama around finals?  

[Myhrie]

Mmm I'm kinda in a similar situation with my mom. But still pretty different because I love my mom and I'm really close to her. But she really went downhill recently. After my dad died she got in this awful relationship (which is over now thankfully) and started drinking a lot and doing drugs (I don't know what kind, I didn't want to know) and she even got a DUI. But I don't really blame her because after my dad dying and being in this awful relationship, she got post-traumatic stress disorder. And she has a gazillion reasons for it that gave her all sorts of psychological problems that I won't go into but it's really amazing she's survived as a sane person as long as she did.

But it's frustrating because she's in a frozen state and can't help me with anything. I'm 18 and I don't have my driver's license yet because I have no one to help me practice. She can't help me because she lost her license temporarily from the DUI. It's so frustrating because she's one of my few blood family members and means so much to me. She's the only person really like me and she doesn't have any blood family at all but me.

And like you, I can't just tell my friends about all this because how am I supposed to say, "Oh yeah my mom doesn't work anymore and she got a DUI and she might still be doing drugs. My grandma gives her money so we can keep our house and not be hobos. Oh and she spends a lot of money on clothes and shoes to make herself feel better even though she doesn't even have an income." (She did stop drinking though because otherwise her limbs might have had to be amputated T____T)

It's awful because she's an awesome person. She was an incredibly talented graphic designer and photographer and seeing her like this is so hard. I can't bear to tell the people around me about it because I don't want them to think badly of her. But at the same time I desperately want to tell people so that they'll understand why I don't have a job or anything. Why my life is frozen too. I'm waiting for her really. ;^;


Okay I was supposed to make you feel better but that didn't really happen. lawwwllll I just complained a lot. xD Guess I needed to talk. lol  

[Ryu Redwings]

I'm actually really glad you posted.
I don't know anyone who's ever been in a situation like mine, so I guess it's nice to see I'm not the only one in world deal with it?
I do love my dad, it's just really hard sometimes.
He's my dad, who's loved me my whole life, but he's also an emotionally and mentally abusive trainwreck of a person.
Some days I feel like I'm going to lose since I'll be so stuck with this person who can be really great sometimes and then there's this other person who can turn around and be completely horrible.  

[Cinnamon_Digory]

Better than kittens and Also better than kittens  

[Yaoinaut]

I won't really say anything, since I have no experience with such situations, and would have to seem patronising or unsympathic. So here's some cute pictures