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BLONDE JOKES !?! Goto Page: 1 2 3 4 [>] [»|]

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Are you Blonde ?
  YES! (Proudly)
  yea... (Sadly)
  Not Anymore ( i dyed it )
  Nope, Never Was. (never will be)
  Nope, Never Was. (but will be)
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o0 Alura 0o

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 13, 2009 12:20 am



User Image
!!! JOKES !!!

Ok - Since There Are SO MANY
- And I Aint BLonde -
( LMAO )
I Decided 2 Start An Entire Thread Fer 'em...
User Image
Here goes !!!
POST 'EM IF YA GOT 'EM !!!


User Image - Blocked by "Display Image" Settings. Click to show.User Image - Blocked by "Display Image" Settings. Click to show.User ImageUser Image - Blocked by "Display Image" Settings. Click to show.User Image - Blocked by "Display Image" Settings. Click to show.

Disclaimer:
I have nothing against blondes. i swear i don't.
but hey - there's just so many jokes out there -
- so laugh with us and have a great read!

User Image - Blocked by "Display Image" Settings. Click to show.
 
PostPosted: Sat Jun 13, 2009 12:21 am


Q: Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
A: She was throwing all the W's away. Image

Q: Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice?
A: Because it said "Concentrate" Image

Q: A one armed blonde pirate is hanging from a tree. How can you get her down?
A: You wave at her! Image

Q: Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
A: Because red means stop. Image

Q: Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
A: You can park in the handicap zone. Image

Q: How did the blonde die drinking milk?
A: The cow fell on top of her. Image

Q: Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman than a regular one?Image
A: You have to hollow out the head.

A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor.
The doctor asked her "What happened?"
She answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang, but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear."
"Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But what happened to your other ear?"
"The person called back."
 

o0 Alura 0o

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o0 Alura 0o

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 13, 2009 12:23 am


Q: Why did the blonde try and steal a police car?
A: On the back she saw "911" and thought it was a Porsche.

Q: What does Star Trek's Dr Bones McCoy say before he performs brain surgery on a blonde?
A: Space. The final frontier..........

Q: What did the blond do when she missed the 66 Bus?
A: She took the 33 bus twice instead.

Q: Why do ya reckon Blonds don't have elevator jobs?
A: Cos they've no idea of the route.

Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes Twinkle?
A: You shine a torchlight in her ear.

Q: Did you hear about the blond Bear?
A: Got stuck in a hunter's trap, chewed off it's 2 paws and 1 leg, and was still stuck.

Q: How does a stereotypical blonde spell Farm?
A: E-I-E-I-O.

Q: How do you measure their intelligence?
A: Stick a tire pressure gauge in their ear.

It's with great tragedy that I report my blonde next door neighbour tried to kill her toy poodle.
She tried putting batteries in it.

To amuse a Blonde for hours, give her a sheet of paper with 'Please turn over' scribbled on both sides.

Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO?
A: There have been sightings of UFOs.

Q: What do you call a swimming pool full of blondes?
A: Frosted Flakes.

Q: What do you call a blonde holding a brief case, up a tree?
A: The Branch Manager.

Q: What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory?
A: Proof-reading.

Q: How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?
A: You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.

Q: Why do blondes love lightning?
A: They reckon somebody is taking their photo.

It's with tremendous sadness that I report a local blond girl has lost 95% of her brains....yes, her husband just died.

Q: What's brown, red, black and blue?
A: A Brunette who's been tellin one too many blonde jokes.

NEWSFLASH: Blonde girl fired from Banana plantation for throwing out all the bent ones.

Q: Why couldn't the blonde manage to make Ice-Cubes?
A: She couldn't find the recipe.
 
PostPosted: Sat Jun 13, 2009 11:28 am


Did you hear the one about the two blondes who walked into a building?
You'd think one of them would've seen it!

Santa, the Easter Bunny, a smart blonde and a dumb blonde jump off a bridge for a splash contest. Who wins?
The dumb blonde; The other three don't exist

LordMarthelas


GalateasFire

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 13, 2009 7:34 pm


A blonde was driving down the road one day when she noticed another blonde in a rowboat in the middle of a field.
The first blonde stopped her car and yelled at the other blonde.
"People like you are what give us blonde's a bad name!"
And if I could swim I would come out there and kick your butt!"
PostPosted: Sun Jun 14, 2009 8:56 pm


Why do blondes have such big belly buttons?

From sleeping with blonde men xd

dewshine_angel
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 17, 2009 2:32 pm


Ok i am blonde but not a ditzy one dew and li-mei can tell you that. Sooo anywayz i hope you like this one and understand it.
There was a blonde walking in town and then she decided to get a hair cut. The blonde walks in and says to the barber i need a hair cut. He asks her to sit in a chair and she did, then he told her to take off her head phones that she walked in with. The blonde says "I cant because if i do i will die" The Barber thinking she was completely crazy didn't listen and took the headphones off of her head. The next thing you know the blonde dies. The Barber completely curious as to what she was listening picked up the headphones and heard a voice go "Breate in Breathe out, Breathe in Breathe out?"

That makes me wonder what all ditzy blondes are listening to on their ipods.
PostPosted: Wed Jun 17, 2009 6:30 pm


How do you kill a dumb blond?

Put a scratch-and-sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.

LilChibiusa
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dewshine_angel
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Wed Jun 17, 2009 9:44 pm


Lol, my sweetie wanted to post that one Chibi!
PostPosted: Wed Jun 17, 2009 11:42 pm


I read your sweetie's mind? eek I guess that means I'm telapathetic! (another really bad blond joke)

LilChibiusa
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PostPosted: Thu Jun 18, 2009 11:29 am


dewshine_angel
Why do blondes have such big belly buttons?

From sleeping with blonde men xd


Eugh, that's disgusting. >_>
PostPosted: Thu Jun 18, 2009 4:19 pm


A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde replies, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help her with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then..." he says with a deep sigh, "Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."

rofl

dewshine_angel
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PostPosted: Sat Jun 20, 2009 5:00 pm


just making a mark today.
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 16, 2009 7:40 am


whoa thats a lot of blonde jokes O_O'

izuna_13_13

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