Nanas, Grandmas & everything in between

[damnatio memoriae]

So I'm going through a fairly difficult time at the moment with my Nana. This past thursday she had a mild heart attack. She's 95 and until this incident she lived by herself. She is truly a lady whom not one person could say one negative thing about. She has inspired me in every aspect of my life. Today we transfered her from the hospital to a nursing home, easily the hardest thing I've ever experienced. I know my days with her are numbered and I'm reaching out to you all for some support. We all have grandmothers and I'd like to hear all about yours, be it good or bad. (Yes, bad grandmothers do exist. My paternal grandmother is one.) Please share it will make me feel a little better! Also I'd like to hear any interesting nicknames you have for your grandmas.  

[Super Buick]

i'd tell you about my grandparents, but unfortunately, they've all passed on while i was young except for my mom's mother, who died a couple years ago, but i'd rather not discuss her. she and i really didn't get along.  

[LacertaRex]

My Grandma is 82 years old, and for the most part keeps active. She's lived by herself since 1994 up until last year or so, when she moved in with my aunt. Other than that she still bowls twice a week and is a fanatical Seattle Mariners fan. Back in 1999 I took her to her first (and mine) Major League baseball game.

I'd love to live to be 95 years old and still be active and independent. My stepfather's mother (I guess you could consider her to be another Grandma) was quite independent, and I'd always stay the night on the weekends and she would make pancakes in the morning. However, one night she seemed to be exhibiting the symptoms of Alzheimer's disease (forgetting where things are) and being a young kid then it worried me a lot. Apparently I was the only one who noticed this change in her, and as a result she went into a nursing home shortly thereafter.  

[Doressa]

I'm so sorry to hear about your Grandma, I hope she makes a full recovery!!!  

[damnatio memoriae]

Thanks so much for sharing and the warm wishes! I'm truly enjoying spending this time with her, just being near her right now is my comfort.  

[kekadu]

Best wishes for you and your grandma.

I would just say spend as much time with her as you can, which is definitely a good idea. Nursing homes are hard, but as long as you remind her that she has people who love her and visit her, it won't be so bad, I think.  

[Luciano LaChance]

I wish I had the chance to know my mom's mom better than I did, she passed away due to breast cancer before I reestablished contact with my mom. As for my dad's mom...

G-ma (yeah we even call her that)...the best way to sum her up is actually something I read off a pillow a few years back that I bought for G-ma for mom's day.

A Grandma is a little bit parent, a little bit teacher and a little bit best friend.

G-ma and G-Pa raised my brothers and I from the time I was 4 years old right after my parents divorced, till I was around 11 years old when Dad married the *itch. When I moved out of my dad's place when I was 20, G-ma was my link back to my family. My and and brothers are all bad about answering their phones. So at least once a day I would call her and chat about anything and every thing. She is the one person I can honestly turn to when everything around me is falling apart. She let me move back in when I was 23, I've lived with her since. Sure we have are arguements here and there, but in the end we're still close.

I tell her all the time that she is going to live forever, along with her siser my Aunt Betty. lol G-ma will be 70 years old this year, and going bowling every Friday morning, goes to bingo at least twice a week, and still works at the same hotel I do when we need her. She most likely the most active "old lady" I know. lol  

[damnatio memoriae]

G-ma and G-Pa.... I love it! Such awesome nicknames!  

[Noirkaze]

I only had my maternal grandmother growing up. My dad's mom passed when he was 11. The stories I've heard about her make her sound to be one dynamic woman, she would have had to have been to put up with my grandpa.

Me-maw was one of the people to raise me. She was around at my brith and took me to school as well as babysat me while my parents struggled to put a life together for the three of us. Not easy when you have children at 16 and 18. I have many fond memories of her as well as some pretty harsh ones. Both kinds are dear to me.
The harshest I would have to say it the one related to her passing. I didn't get to see her in the hospital and knowing that her last memories of me were all of worry bothers me to no end. The day she was transported to the hospital I was jumped on my way home from school. I get into the house and explain what had happend and then two minutes later she was transported to another city for surgery.
I think you should spend time with her and when you can. One happy memory is of us always clinking glasses when we hugged. It would always make me laugh.

I find it awsome that she has lived such an active life on her own. My pap-paw did too even after his heart attacks in in mid eighties. Fool was even out cleaning out the gutters a week after his open heart surgery. Don't let her give up, let her know you still care.  

[Bakura Amane]

Well, I have no grandparents living left to say the least. sweatdrop I never really got acquainted with my maternal grandma as she passed away when I was only one or two. My paternal grandma ("Granny" as we called her) was a bit of a predjudiced person and also very old-fashioned.

I learned a great deal of how NOT to act as she and my mom never got along very well. They practically always yelled at one another or got on one another's nerves quite frequently. I was often sent to easedrop on conversations that Granny had with the rest of the family to tell my mom what they were saying about her. confused

Granny also seemed to not get along with people who were not white. She felt that whites were the best it seemed. She was also very old-fashioned in the respect that, when I said I didn't like to cook or sew she told me I'd never attract a man that way. She even told me that I shouldn't want to do things that were considered a man's job, e.g., doctor or lawyer. xd Those were my two things that I always wanted to be for as long as I can remember (and I still have some of that passion in me, but not as much).

Granny (and the rest of the paternal side of my family) is also very penny-pinchy. They would/and do (not that there's anything wrong with any of this, but they do/did it to the extreme) shop at thrift stores, use greeting cards that are at least 20 or 30 years old, believe that a single US dollar will buy you at least 20 pieces of candy, wrap tape over and over (and over, etc.) a single AA battery so as not to buy a size D battery for a clock that requires one, and refuse to buy new clothing and undergarments (I know this because after she passed away I found several yellowed and ratty bras, underware, and slips in her drawers).

Lastly, we always (Steven and I that is) would turn in our report cards or grades to her and for every "A" that was on the card we would get one US dollar! I suppose that's why I strive so hard now to get A's, but I don't get paid any more for them. cry

On a different note, I have adopted (no not legally), two wonderful women as my new grandmas. One (Sara) is from my parish, who is not doing so well at the moment and requires a lot of attention and prayers. She always smiles and laughs. She is very frail and yet always seems to be happy and proud of Steven and me with what we can and do accomplish. The second woman is a co-worker of mine (Sandy). She is short (even shorter than I am), has what I call salt-and-pepper hair, wears glasses and enjoys my company. She called me once when I went on lunch break and she just got off work. Her only message on my voice mail was "I'm sitting here in my car watching you eat lunch. It was nice to see you at work today. Talk at you later. Bye." I had been sick both mentally and physically for a little over two weeks, and finally made it back to work that day. I had seriously thought about quitting even though I needed the money (just like now) desperately. That gave me enough courage and strength back to make it the rest of the day and week. It also convinced me that I am very important to at least one of my co-workers.  

[LadyGlamSlam]

My grandmother became my mother in 1989. My own mother passed away from a brain aneurysm and she took over immediately. Although my dad may be the favorite in the sense of her biological children (yes, she has a favorite but loves her kids equally. It's just that he's the youngest son who stuck around her the most. My aunt stuck with grandpa more.) I am her "fourth child" in a sense. She gave me a home with lots of love and support. She fed me, made nice clothes with me, and put up with a LOT of my crazy ways. She helped me and my dad out a lot.
In her hayday she was an esteemed seamstress. She's a good old fashioned Southern lady who still believes in wearing a girdle under all clothes and that makeup makes a woman feel good. She has a serious sweet tooth but sticks to a pretty good diet. She's a bit of a neat freak and a spit fire. (lol Gemini!) If she gets mad enough, she's liable to say anything on her mind.
Nevertheless, she is a very sweet and caring woman. That's why it's been a little hard lately to deal with her dementia. She's not a bad person at all for it, but, it has changed her personality and her way of remembering. All the family is being patient with her and we even took her to our nice time share in Orlando. Dad let her use the hot tub and we even took her to a fancy seafood place. You know, I'd love to have her around forever to watch me do my thing, have my kids and get married. Hell, I want everyone to be around forever. I know that cannot be but I know where you are coming from. I've got tears in my eyes as I write this because the subject of grandmothers is a dear thing to me. I mean sometimes yes she and I argue but she loves me unconditionally and I'd break my back to do anything for her. I do my best to love her as she is and what she has done for me.
That is why based on your post alone, I know there is lots of love between you and your gramma. Remember and celebrate the times you have had with her. Cherish, love her, and do all you can for her now. I mean, I don't have to say that because I am sure you're doing that now. You have my and everyone else's support here. *hugs*  

[damnatio memoriae]

LadyGlamSlam- your post brought tears to my eyes. I really appreciate you taking the time to share. Today was an especially rough day. I've been here for 3 weeks now and I'm beyond thankful for the time that I've had with her. She looked so frail today that my mom and I broke down several times while visiting her. I head home on Sunday and it's killing me that this will probably be the last time that I see her alive. I just want to be with her and hold her hand until the end.
My Nana was also a sewer. I received a sewing machine for Christmas a few years back, it's the best gift I've ever received. You should try it out. It's really not as difficult as it looks and finishing a project is very fulfilling. It makes me feel a connection to my family roots.
I'm so sorry that you have to see your grandma lose her memory. I can't even imagine the pain that you experience when she doesn't remember. I hope that you can find some peace in looking out for her now like she did for you when you were younger.

I'd like to thank everyone again for all the stories and support. It means the world to me that someone I don't know would take the time to share very personal and meaningful stories with me. It's beyond words.