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 Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:53 pm
OK. I face a large problem. Now, I'm going to put this all into one post, and I want honesty, but please read the whole thing first.
---Recently, I've been trying to come up with and idea of what I'm going to do with my life, 'who I'm going be, what I'm going to do, etc.' and I've been thinking what would work best for me; Here is the first problem: Who is 'ME'? I've got a lot to consider, and yet I don't even know who I am in person. I want my life to have something meaningful, yet still retain my dignity of who I am. Ego has nothing to do with this. Anyways, what I mean is, 'what lifestyle path am I going to follow, or live with, and what am I going to do in life', and yet, that leads to another big problem; Acceptance.
---I want to be able to live like I want to, without critism, but that's not going to happen. For one, my Dad; he wants me to be more social, and less withdrawn. There never has been a lot of support from his end, in the way that I'd like it to be done. Then, there is his family; they have their heads stuck so far up their asses. They all want one thing: a perfect little family that does everything their way, and is the same as everyone else. Not ******** likely. It's not going to happen. But the problem there is that they can't even help but critisize others. They think it's funny to critisize my sister for being friends with guys. I'm not even going to mention that I'm friends with women. They also have closed minds. One minute, they say that there is nothing wrong with being Bisexual, or Homosexual, and yet, the next time someone mentions anything to do with that, they say "Oh, that's disgusting!". We get incredably pissed off at that.
---Now, onto my city. It's a wrather small city, with a populace of 78 000 citizens. Everywhere you turn, you find a church, or something to do with God. Now, I'm somewhere in between Athiest and Pagan. When somebody who isn't part of their "one true" religion says right out that they aren't part of it, they tend to treat you like you have the plague. If they see someone who wears something dark, or gothic, or their definition of normal, they gossip and insult them, or call them a freak, and treat them like one too. Then there are the close-minded teens who try to convert people, and sometimes go far enough to jump people. I have fears of what would happen to me if I ran into some of these people.
That's pretty much it. So, now I'm stuck with having to either:
-----Keeping this stuff bottled inside until I can't take it anymore.
--OR--
-----Let these things involving this subject slip, and end up facing everyone and their opinions.
I could use some help and ideas on this subject.
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Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:51 pm
*That first problem is not at all uncommon. I've also several times found myself going through that crisis of "Who am I/who will I be?" - many teens do. On the bright side, you still have several years to sort this out.
*It can be pretty hard to gain acceptance if you're introverted. I'm sorry to say this, but I agree with your dad on this aspect - if you have confidence, it often makes acceptance much more attainable. As for their views on differences in your family and their critical views on others, there's probably nothing you'll be able to do about that but keep your own values.
*How can you be "in between" those two when one involves complete disregard for any kind of god? Perhaps you mean to be an agnostic?
Anyway, confidence and assertiveness (not aggressiveness - stand-up for yourself, but don't threaten or perpetrate violence or verbal abuse) - again - may be your only tools when faced with such types.
As for bottling up or letting things slip away, neither one is really the best thing to do. The former compounds your problem; the other ignores it. For one last mentioning, be assertive about your problems and try to solve them.
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-Resurrected Writer- Crew
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