Where do I begin?

[SeekatStyles]

Hello. I guess I'll start with a little background info. My name is Josh. I am the second oldest of six and the only boy. I was raised by my mother, grand-mother, and aunt (flopping back and forth between my mother & grandmother, then living with my aunt for all of high-school now I'm back with my mother). The one thing that was consistent was that I was always in church. I had been baptized at a young age but didn't know what it meant exactly. I was never really a 'bad' kid, I wasn't exactly Christian either. I recently accepted Christ in my heart last summer at a Youth Revival. Random Break, sorry: I figured I should mention the dreams, I had in which God 'spoke' to me. In one, He shielded me from death with His light. Another I was marrying His daughter. The last I was given a very clear message that I was on a path to hell. I have no idea what they meant at the time and I have speculations now. But yeah trying to set a scene here... After the revival, I got involved with this Christian organization called Young Life (If you don't know what this is, I'll make a separate post about it at another time). That was the first step towards me beginning to actually live for Christ after accepting Him in my heart.

I try to pray and read the bible. I attended church regularly and participated in a lot of activities there. I am looking into getting involved with Young Life activities here in Tennessee. I just find it hard to live a Christian life-style by myself, if that makes any sense. Like I believe in God, he's saved me from so much and has given me so many chances. I just find it hard to stay committed to reading his word and communicating with Him when I'm not asking him for something or in a group setting. Is it wrong that I need to be held accountable before I can engage with Christ? I don't know what to say; I'm just lost. I want to get to know Him but I just let other stuff take priority and I hate myself for it...  

[Blaise-Ingram]

Interacting with other Christians in a group is dandy and all, but maybe you'd feel more satisfied if you followed Jesus and did things like feeding and clothing the poor. Just buy some cheap stuff, food or clothing or otherwise, go into some crummy neighborhoods, and start passing out food and clothing to people. Don't even wait for anyone else like a canned food drive or anything to do it.

And then try talking with some people. Get to know them. Learn about their families, their daily lives.

The poor need love, and you can show your love for God and his commandments by going out and doing something directly in your community. Love your neighbor as thyself. smile

Church activities and Bible study are only so good and can only go so far because unfortunately, they don't improve anyone's lives except for the people who are already in the church. Don't get me wrong, they're great and fun... but don't just be a Christian at church, be a Christian ALL the time, EVERYWHERE. Go out and DO something. Be a fruitful tree; not a barren one. A barren tree is no better than a tree that bears crummy fruit. Doing good for the community and helping the poor is a really good way to produce good fruit. That way, you will also be setting an example for other Christians to go out and take a personal part in your community.

Also don't be concerned about your own salvation as much as helping others. Put others before yourself and do God's work and salvation is something that will likely follow. Don't worry about going to Hell, worry about all the other people in your local community who have little to no food or clothing, or are struggling to get by. They will appreciate any help you can give. Other people need salvation, too, so don't worry about yourself too much.

If you're worried about transportation, maybe convince a friend or family member to drive you once a week, or even another member of the church who has a car. If you're worried about money, ask for donations at church each week that will be used to go and buy food and clothing for that week's run.

Maybe it will be a while until you really feel like you know Christ. But think of how many people say and truly believe "I know Jesus!" but are barren trees that don't do any work, or follow Jesus's teachings? So I leave you with one question:

Would you rather be the kind of Christian who feels good all the time about knowing Jesus, or the kind of Christian who actually makes a difference in their community?  

[Blaise-Ingram]

TL;dr version:

If you're so grateful that God has given you so many second chances, go out and show your thanks to God by doing exactly what he did for you, to other people who need second chances too.  

[SeekatStyles]

Blaise-Ingram

I know what you mean. I want to do that, I should and hopefully will do that once I get settled in here. Right now, I'm focusing on getting used to everyone's schedules here and getting a job. After I do that I want to volunteer at an animal shelter since I love animals so much. If I can stretch my time even further I'd like to volunteer at a homeless shelter. When I lived in Ohio, I used to feed the needy at a soup kitchen on Sundays. I guess I can't rush faith... change comes slowly...