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 Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2012 2:06 pm
I, am just LIVID and need to vent, so, so hard.
A few months ago (June to be exact) my great aunt Ida died. We didn't even know she was sick, my grandma went to visit her after getting home from a cruise, and she was sick. She went to the hospital, and they said she doesnt have much time left. We got no call, NOTHING. They called my grandma, and told her that she doesn't have much time left, and she might want to come set with her, so she wasn't alone. My grandma told the doctor that they "weren't that close". So aunt Ida died, alone, in a hospital.
Fast forward a month, turns out *surprise surprise* that aunt Ida left my grandma some money. 100,000$ to be exact, with the stipulation that she takes *the whole family* on a trip, of some kind. (We didn't find the amount, and that last little tid bit out till later) We went to her house, for a visit, since she enjoys visits from my niece, the only baby in the family, and her first great grand child. Well, when we arrived, she asked if dad had mentioned anything awesome, and announced that she was taking "the whole family" on a cruise in April, of next year. Of course my sister and I both instantly wondered, if our mother was included in "the family" since my parents were divorced a few years ago. (everyone still calls her aunt Kathy, she goes to the family get togethers, she buys presents for holidays, and everything) I asked "who all is going?" she said "everyone" so, I got straight to the point, and asked "well, like, is mom going?" her exact words, that still fill me with, basically hatred, were "no, not mom! Shes not part of this family anymore!" That made me sooo mad, but it actually gets even worse!!!!!
My sister and I planned to save up, and take mom with us. It would break her heart to be left out, and she deserves better, shes just an amazing beyond all belief person. So a few days ago, when we were at my grandmas house again, my sister asked if my mom could go, if we payed for her (we thought she was getting a group discount, so we wanted to get in on that if she was). She said yes. This morning, my sister got a call from grandma, I don't know everything that was said, but my sisters exact words to me, in a face book message are thus "so grandma called me this morning and told me that mom cant go now that she dont want her too" so yea, I am livid, I cant believe this crap!!! If it wasn't for my mom, my grandma wouldn't even have gotten any mothers day presents from my dad, EVER in the 22, that's right TWENTY TWO, years they were married. They weren't married for a year, and then divorced, or anything, AND it was my DADS idea for them to get divorced!!! I don't even want to go anymore, and honestly, I am wondering if she would get the money if i refuse to go, because, at this point, that looks like its going to happen. I am not ok with her taking everyone, including her BOY FRIEND, and not the mother of her own grand children, shes not even my grandma anymore, that's a title, I don't feel it, shes just not part of my family now, family lives in your heart, not in your blood, and most certainly not on some court appointed piece of paper!!!!!
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Posted: Wed Sep 12, 2012 11:25 am
That's messed up. My parents were never married but my father's family took my mom and my brother in like they were their own. Your grandma sounds like a mean lady. Is she the one that hates the rats?
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Posted: Wed Sep 12, 2012 12:32 pm
Vanilla eXee That's messed up. My parents were never married but my father's family took my mom and my brother in like they were their own. Your grandma sounds like a mean lady. Is she the one that hates the rats? she probably does, my other grandma doesnt HATE them, she just isnt really a fan, but yea, shes mean DX now were going to have to tell my mom that she in fact didnt want her going, to see if she wants to, and can go, so if she can, we can save up money for her, ugh, she deserves better than this >.>
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Posted: Wed Sep 12, 2012 2:59 pm
Honestly, cutting off your mother from the trip sounds like typical divorced family stuff to me, coming from someone with divorced parents. It's fairly common for in-laws to sever ties with their non-blood relative during a divorce, though I don't know the situation of your parents' split. However, my parents did not get along at all when they split, and them being anywhere near each other nowadays would dissolve into nothing but stress, arguing etc. My parents wouldn't want to go anywhere near their used-to-be in-laws, either.
As for your aunt passing, I have nothing to say in your grandmother's defense. She should've told you all.
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Posted: Wed Sep 12, 2012 3:11 pm
Lady Lagomorph Honestly, cutting off your mother from the trip sounds like typical divorced family stuff to me, coming from someone with divorced parents. It's fairly common for in-laws to sever ties with their non-blood relative during a divorce, though I don't know the situation of your parents' split. However, my parents did not get along at all when they split, and them being anywhere near each other nowadays would dissolve into nothing but stress, arguing etc. My parents wouldn't want to go anywhere near their used-to-be in-laws, either.
As for the grandmother thing, I have nothing to say in her defense. She should've told you all. This. Coming from a divorced home, this is completely normal. Your parents got divorced for a reason, and it would make things awkward and tense.
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Posted: Wed Sep 12, 2012 4:14 pm
Azusanga Lady Lagomorph Honestly, cutting off your mother from the trip sounds like typical divorced family stuff to me, coming from someone with divorced parents. It's fairly common for in-laws to sever ties with their non-blood relative during a divorce, though I don't know the situation of your parents' split. However, my parents did not get along at all when they split, and them being anywhere near each other nowadays would dissolve into nothing but stress, arguing etc. My parents wouldn't want to go anywhere near their used-to-be in-laws, either.
As for the grandmother thing, I have nothing to say in her defense. She should've told you all. This. Coming from a divorced home, this is completely normal. Your parents got divorced for a reason, and it would make things awkward and tense. Normally yes, but my dad has been living here for like a month and a half now. And my mom goes to all the family get togethers and everything. My mom and dad talk and stuff all the time. I mean, if it were the kind of house, where they drop the kids off, dont say anything, nothing, I could understand it, but she embraces my mom at other things, and now not this, only things that benefit her, and it really bothers me. ADD: well, my mom might not want to go anyway, shes planning to go to Idaho for an egging convention, and she needs her vacation days for that, and honestly, she would probably have more fun there. That still doesnt change that I am upset at the things my grandma has done...
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