20 fool proof excuses for not doing an essay

[The Full English]

I have one year left at uni , so i thought i would share all the excuse i have come up with over the years for not doing essays
1. What essay?
2. I did it, but I accidentally tore it up
3. I haven't got any hands
4. I'm dead
5. A burglar took it
6. The Time Literary supplement wanted to see it first
7. Up yours, four-eyes
8. We're too poor to afford toilet paper and my father has dysentery
9. I was in a plane crash and we had to eat each other's essay
10. The police confiscated it
11. I know it all-what's the point in writing it down?
12. My desk caught fire
13. I’m undergoing a personality crisis
14. I posted it to you-didn’t you get it?-huh, the Post Office these days, I don’t know
15. I made this bookmark instead
16. Everyone says you’re pregnant, so I didn’t think you would be here today
17. You must be mad- you’ve already marked it and give it back to me–I got an A
18. Look, just get off my back, will you
19. Oh God, I think I’m going to be sick all over you
20. Did you say you wanted me to take all my clothes off?  

[Super Buick]

" i haven't got any hands" did that actually work?? eek  

[Sablara]

If you want a REAL excuse, try RSI - it's too painful to use a computer. (Of course, that would also mean no Gaia. crying )  

[The Full English]

Sablara

If you want a REAL excuse, try RSI - it's too painful to use a computer. (Of course, that would also mean no Gaia. crying )

What's RSI?  

[Roland Isono]

The Full English

Sablara

If you want a REAL excuse, try RSI - it's too painful to use a computer. (Of course, that would also mean no Gaia. crying )

What's RSI?

RSI=Repetitive Stress Injury 3nodding  

[The Full English]

Roland Isono

The Full English

Sablara

If you want a REAL excuse, try RSI - it's too painful to use a computer. (Of course, that would also mean no Gaia. crying )

What's RSI?

RSI=Repetitive Stress Injury 3nodding

just use a pen.  

[Ybrik]

Question: How many of those actually got you out of your essay at least temporarily? Personally, I ALWAYS blame my computer. "The disk didn't save the data." My hard-drive was wiped." "The printer is out of ink." Technology excuses can be gold! xp  

[The Full English]

Ybrik

Question: How many of those actually got you out of your essay at least temporarily? Personally, I ALWAYS blame my computer. "The disk didn't save the data." My hard-drive was wiped." "The printer is out of ink." Technology excuses can be gold! xp

nearly all of them worked, don't think my computer breaking is a good excuse since you can handwrite it.  

[Sablara]

The Full English

Roland Isono

The Full English

Sablara

If you want a REAL excuse, try RSI - it's too painful to use a computer. (Of course, that would also mean no Gaia. crying )

What's RSI?

RSI=Repetitive Stress Injury 3nodding

just use a pen.

You can get RSI from almost any repetative activity. My work is a**l about preventing it - I'm guessing it's cost them a fortune in sick leave. eek  

[Ameliechan]

The Full English

Ybrik

Question: How many of those actually got you out of your essay at least temporarily? Personally, I ALWAYS blame my computer. "The disk didn't save the data." My hard-drive was wiped." "The printer is out of ink." Technology excuses can be gold! xp

nearly all of them worked, don't think my computer breaking is a good excuse since you can handwrite it.

yes that would my professor say,too.
every time you gave him something computer written he taught you found it somewhere in the internet and just copied it.  

[Ybrik]

Hmm, That's actually really interesting to me. All of my papers throughout high school and college were required to be typed, with 1' margins and have a header. They told us it was for efficiency's sake, however, I believe most of the teachers were just lazy and couldn't read many students' handwriting. sweatdrop Too bad. I would have loved to hand write things when I was younger and had a difficult time finding a computer source. As I said though, made for awesome excuses! biggrin  

[spectremis]

you forgot a really good one: because people like me are good at college BS, writing, and impressing teachers and whose services can be bought.  

[The Full English]

Ybrik

Hmm, That's actually really interesting to me. All of my papers throughout high school and college were required to be typed, with 1' margins and have a header. They told us it was for efficiency's sake, however, I believe most of the teachers were just lazy and couldn't read many students' handwriting. sweatdrop Too bad. I would have loved to hand write things when I was younger and had a difficult time finding a computer source. As I said though, made for awesome excuses! biggrin

that actually angers me. when i was in highschool not everyone had a computer. i got my first one 2001 when i was 14 just before i start my GCSE's. i got it for them.  

[Ameliechan]

The Full English

Ybrik

Hmm, That's actually really interesting to me. All of my papers throughout high school and college were required to be typed, with 1' margins and have a header. They told us it was for efficiency's sake, however, I believe most of the teachers were just lazy and couldn't read many students' handwriting. sweatdrop Too bad. I would have loved to hand write things when I was younger and had a difficult time finding a computer source. As I said though, made for awesome excuses! biggrin

that actually angers me. when i was in highschool not everyone had a computer. i got my first one 2001 when i was 14 just before i start my GCSE's. i got it for them.

yes, i highschool we had a teacher who gave you better marks if you send him your homework by mail! we had about 5 people in school who didn´t have a computer and over 10 people who didn´t have internet or an emailadress. i had both but i didn´t send him my homework, noone does it cause we all thaught it would be unfair.
my dad was always mad about technology i was 4 when we got the first computer it was an amiga.  

[The Full English]

Ameliechan

The Full English

Ybrik

Hmm, That's actually really interesting to me. All of my papers throughout high school and college were required to be typed, with 1' margins and have a header. They told us it was for efficiency's sake, however, I believe most of the teachers were just lazy and couldn't read many students' handwriting. sweatdrop Too bad. I would have loved to hand write things when I was younger and had a difficult time finding a computer source. As I said though, made for awesome excuses! biggrin

that actually angers me. when i was in highschool not everyone had a computer. i got my first one 2001 when i was 14 just before i start my GCSE's. i got it for them.

yes, i highschool we had a teacher who gave you better marks if you send him your homework by mail! we had about 5 people in school who didn´t have a computer and over 10 people who didn´t have internet or an emailadress. i had both but i didn´t send him my homework, noone does it cause we all thaught it would be unfair.
my dad was always mad about technology i was 4 when we got the first computer it was an amiga.

i just can't understand how any education institution would force all student use a computer, for work. I know plaenty of people who can't afford a pc and then that means they fail because their work is invalid for not being on a computer.