Corrupt-A-Wish

[blue0212]

Granted, but the potato is evil and tries to kill you. (don't ask how)

I wish that I could teleport  

[Kusaragi]

Granted. But each time you do, you have to loose a body part.

I wish my Boyfriend was back home.  

[blue0212]

Granted, but your boyfriend decides to move, minutes after arriving.

I wish that I had friends cry  

[nedozuki_88]

granted, but as it turns out, they are nothing but 3 goats in a trench jacket

i wish it would rain  

[blue0212]

granted, but it rains so much that it drowns everybody (except aquaman, but who cares about him?)

i wish for the ability to read minds  

[nedozuki_88]

*granted, but as it turns out, everybody has the mind capacity of a tomatoe...

i wish for the rain to stop >.>  

[blue0212]

Granted, it starts to hail instead

I wish for a better attention span  

[Prinniesdood]

Granted, your attention span has incresed by 0.000000000000000000010%.

I wish I was Richard, the Chief Warlock of the Brothers of Darkness, Lord of the Thirteen Hells, Master of the Bones, Emperor of the Black, Lord of the Undead, Mayor of a Little Village Up the Coast, Mistress of Lava, and Lord of Dance.  

[Lobo-chan]

Granted, but no one ever remembers your full title so they just call you "Rich the Uppity".

I wish I had more time to do things I want to do.  

[Prinniesdood]

Granted, but when yo do the things you want to do, they never turn out the way you want them to.

I wish I had a can opener...  

[Lobo-chan]

Granted, but it only works on "Whoop a**" and you eventually get arrested for opening said can.

I wish that all of the loud things didn't happen right outside my window while I'm trying to sleep.