Looking for critiques.

[Fishiesinthesky]

So, yeah, I'm a writer. You all know that. xd And I could really use some honest, constructive criticism on my fics. They're all one-shots, so you don't have to worry about settling down to read a twenty-chapter plot monstrosity or anything! It's my humble request of you, that's all.

Here's my ff.net:
http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1165192/

There are only four out of the five I have that are SxN. And just so you know, the one I need the most criticism for right now is Caffeine. I posted it just yesterday, and I think it's quite good by my standards. Don't even try to read Waiting out the Rain... ugh. It's horrible, and I wrote it at three in the morning on a sugar-high. So... yeah.

Tell me what you think! wink If you don't have a ff.net account, you can always just put your thoughts in a post on this topic. Thank you so much!  

[StrawBerry_Eve]

Uwaah!!! You're a writer!!! That's amazing. I hope I can pick up on writing my own fics sometime soon. 'w'

Anyways. Let me tell you, first of all, that YOU DON'T SUCK. You're pretty good, amatuer at the least. Here's what I think on all 4/5 of those fics:

Waiting In The Rain - I don't understand why you think it's horrible. It actually got a few chuckles from me. Yes, it is a little on the side of stupid, but it's quite humorous. You might wanna be careful with the beggining, though. I feel that if you put your attention on the time & setting of a story, that you're really just over-dramatizing it a bit. [Heh, does that make sense? I'm not always sure if I'm using the proper choice of words. sweatdrop ]

Sleeping Beauty - My favorite, tied with Caffeine. ^^ Lol, sorry, I have nothing really else to say. I'm drained from not sleeping after a long day, yesterday. >_< Lol, but I just knew Kakashi was awake the whole time, clever ol' him. >w< Oh, and it wasn't too unoriginal [at least not to me]. You did a good job, and that's what counts. -w- *being laidback*

Midnight - I think you put it on a smooth pace. [If you know what I mean.] Even though it was short, it had an sir of nostalgia and all. But I think you should of expanded that one-shot a bit more, but not too much. Like, per-say [sp?], about 435 - 750 words? Sorry if that doesn't flow correctly for you, I just lik reading a lot. xD

Caffeine - My favorite, tied with Sleeping Beauty. ^^ I think it's very creative to have Naruto as the narrator in present tense. But here is the advice. Which you don't need to follow, btw. I don't think it'd be best to go off the subject. Occasionally, yes, but more than less, not so much. I think you went a little bit there. But I due understand that in your A.N., you wrote clearly that there was no plot, much less a pre-determined one. So you do have to use what you have at your full advantage at times.

Lol, sorry if I have confused you in anything or anyway. I don't think I'm the type to give good constructive criticism. [Maa~ can you really blame me, though? I'm only 12 years-old.] ^^"" But nonetheless, I liked your fics at a 'Amatuer, Yet Satisfying' level. You know what I mean? Lol, if you think I might be a bit snotty & all [which I can be when I want to be], then if it's any consolation at all, I'll tell you it made my 'morning'.

P.S. - Dude, I didn't have an ounce of sleep tonight!!! We insomniacs have it hard sometimes, ne? -3- And I was just thinking about banging my head on this keyboard a few times to get rid of the throbbing headache....... Thankfully your stories came in and gave me a boost of energy!!! ^w^

 

[Fishiesinthesky]

Yeah. 3nodding I totally get what you mean... thanks for this, by the way! Wow, I'm surprised- I never thought my stories could possibly do that for someone! XD

Waiting out The Rain was never meant to be a "good" story, though, in the first place- it was the first thing that flowed forth from my fingertips upon my muse's return. I was so overjoyed to finally be able to write after that two-year silence (TWO FLIPPIN' YEARS! That's a heck of a long time for someone who needs to write to survive!) that I went ahead and posted it, not even waiting for a second or even third burst of inspiration to hit. If that explains it a bit. sweatdrop (I appreciate the ideas, though. I can definitely work on fine-tuning my stuff. And you do an excellent job at pointing out exactly what feels funny about a piece of fiction.)

Sleeping Beauty- I know what you mean about the sleep. xd My clock reads 3:38... I'm gonna have a monster headache tomorrow. Thank you for your review of this one. smile It's one of my favourite pieces, too.

Yeah, I guess I could have made Midnight longer... but I was aiming for a certain word count. I had to cut out a few parts to make it shorter. I probably should have left them.

Ah, yes, Caffeine... I know I went a little off-topic on that one. I wanted it to seem like Naruto's thoughts were coming out of nowhere, that the reader was seeing them at the moment that Naruto was thinking them... but I guess I messed up. more evidence that I still have a long way to go as a writer. ;D I'll work on that, I promise.

Naw, don't worry about it! I think we have more in common than you might think- I can be snooty, too, without even realizing it. And, yeah, I really do know what you mean. Because I've thought the same thing, too, about lots of fics. Thank you sooo much for doing this- I really needed an honest critique, and I'm really grateful.

Haha, yes. We have it harsh. I'm glad I helped a fellow insomniac. whee Take care- I know I end up bumping into walls sometimes...